What You Came For
by HanareHatake
Summary: For Kakashi's birthday, Guy & Asuma decide it's high time to cross some things off the Copy Nin's bucket list: champagne, fondue fountains, buxom dancers... Kakashi just wants to Icha & chill but he's getting MUCH more than even his friends bargained for. Will one weekend in the big city change everything?... / KakaHana / Street Fighter sprinkles
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** Actually the very first Naruto fic I started. It's a romp with adorably awkward, hot Kakashi in his Sukea look for part of the time.

 **Rated M** for language, adult themes, villains being scummy and also because it got juicier than I initially intended.

Hope you like! Matta neh.

 **The Concept**

After Hanare's failed mission to the Leaf and Grandpa Lock's suicide to avoid capture at the hands of Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura, Lock Village falls into political chaos. Hanare renounces her ties to Lock and sets out to make a new life in the big city as a civilian, but the economy's down and she ends up forced to take a job as - what else - a stripper. About a year after Episode 191 it's Kakashi's birthday and Guy and Asuma decide it's high time to cross some things off Kakashi's "bucket list"...

 **Chapter 1**

"Guy! Let go of me. I don't even have a bucket list!"

"Of course you do, Kakashi! And it's the most youthful Bucket List that ever existed! Written entirely by me, Might Guy, of course - and featuring no less than one-hundred-ninety-one items that you, Kakashi Hatake, my Eternal Rival, must do before you die or risk leaving this world in shameful dishonor! Forever known as Kakashi the Cowardly Copy Nin!"

"Guy no-" Kakashi was ignored as Asuma grabbed one arm and Guy the other. They dragged him under the glowing neon sign.

"WHAT luck! Our first stop appears before us!" Guy waved his arm with a flourish.

Kakashi looked up and blushed, stunned. It was one of _those_ types of places - places he'd read about in his novels but had never set foot in. Places he'd pretended to be into to weird out the kids of Team 7 but that never in his life had he desired to actually patronize. _Pinku Paradisu_ beamed down upon him. A smaller blinking sign on the tinted window promised "hostesses and more!"

"Sweeeet," said Asuma. "Think I got enough smokes to last about five hours."

"Wha-no! Five hours? Asuma, Guy, look-"

"Tsk tsk Kakashi! No teleporting or escape jutsus allowed! We had Tsunade slip you a little potion to suppress just those kinds of urges," Guy cackled as Kakashi slumped, resigned.

"Let's go, famous copy nin," Asuma chuckled, giving him a friendly shove in the back.

"Time to put that Sharingan of yours to a real test!" Guy bellowed as they went in.

Kakashi's groan was drowned out by blaring music as his senses were completely overwhelmed by smoke and darkness and the sickly sweet smell of floral perfume…

 **the day before yesterday**

Guy woke up at 4 a.m., as usual, eyes snapping open at the first chime of his alarm. He threw off his bedcovers, flung himself into the shower, whistled a showtune for the 3 minutes he was in the water, then brushed his teeth furiously with half a tube of whitening paste. He groomed his eyebrows, combed his hair with pomade and dabbed on some expensive cologne. He jumped into his whitey tighties and cartwheeled into his jumpsuit. It all took him about 6 minutes total. He finished with a dazzling grin and huge thumbs-up at his own reflection in the hallway mirror.

"Good morning, you beast," he said.

Upon looking at his calendar next to the door, Guy gasped in nervous pleasure. September 13! Two days before his best friend and lifetime rival's birthday - time to put in motion the birthday scheme he'd been working on for the better part of a year. Guy dashed out of his apartment and headed to Asuma's, forgetting to eat breakfast in his excitement.

Luckily the Green Beast of Konoha always carried an emergency supply of protein bars - crammed in with the leg weights he wore beneath his orange knit legwarmers.

 **yesterday morning**

"I can't believe the Hokage went along with your ridiculous idea, Guy." Kakashi's voice was slightly muffled by his mask and the fact he was tied up and smashed in the middle of the backseat between an enormous Hello Kitty doll and a gigantic bunch of a few dozen helium balloons. Not to mention the gauche bouquet of roses and wildflowers on his lap was irritating his sinuses and making his voice thick and his head sleepy.

"Aunty Tsunade was only too happy to help," Asuma grunted with a smile from the front, flicking his cigarette ash expertly out the window while he drove cavalierly with his other wrist draped over the steering wheel.

Asuma glanced into the rearview mirror. "She said you needed to 'get some miles on you' haha! Any idea what she's talkin' about there Hatake?"

"None," the copy ninja replied grimly. Asuma grinned. Then his smile slipped.

"The old man liked a good party gag like this too," Asuma murmured.

"I'm sorry," Kakashi said sincerely. Asuma shook his head, pulling out another cigarette and waggling it in front of the rearview. Kakashi nodded in understanding. Asuma lit up and they drove in silence awhile. Kakashi hated the station Asuma had it on… some kind of country music… but he figured the right thing was to let the bereaved younger Sarutobi listen to whatever the hell he wanted to.

Then just like that, the peace was shattered.

Guy's head popped up from the pile of guidebooks, brochures, maps and flyers that covered the passenger seat. "I'M OVERFLOWING WITH THE FEELINGS OF YOUTH," he sniffled, eyes wet with unshed tears. "It… it says right here-" he jabbed a steely finger at a spread-eagled brochure, "that there's a complimentary champagne fountain in the hotel lobby every Friday! And a complimentary chocolate fondue fountain… every Saturday brunch…!"

Kakashi tried not to roll his eyes. "So? What are you getting at, Guy?"

"TODAY IS FRIDAY… WHICH MEANS TOMORROW'S SATURDAY!" Guy cried out, tears spilling over as he pumped both fists. "Think of it Kakashi - champagne tonight, chocolate fonduuuuue tomorrow!"

Asuma laughed. Kakashi closed his eyes, stifling a sigh.

The scenery rolled past the windows, changing from Leaf region forest to green hills to a more arid horizon. Signs appeared, then poles and wires. Then more signs.

Kakashi felt himself getting sleepy. _So far… it's a very strange birthday._

 **last night**

"So that's it then? That's your answer?"

Kakashi turned his face, trying to reply. _NO, that's not it, I need to tell you-_

He couldn't breathe, something was suffocating him. Everything was dark. He turned again, trying to find the source of the voice. _Maybe if I take off this damn mask…_ His fingers flexed and scrabbled but he couldn't free them.

"So that's it then?" The voice was softer, sadder. Kakashi tried to shout, to scream, but he had no air and the shadows were choking him.

"So that's your answer…" her voice was a whisper, trailing off. A sudden gust of wind brought her faint scent to him, and he knew he was too late - she was gone.

"Kakashi?! Kakashi!"

He blinked. _Did she come back for me? Did-_

"A youth-induced nightmare, nothing more, nothing less!" boomed an all-too-familiar baritone.

Kakashi felt the bindings loosen from his hands and he reached up to snatch everything away from his face, squinting angrily at Guy as he did so.

"It had nothing to do with youth! It was induced by you nearly suffocating me with this thing!" Kakashi shook the offending Hello Kitty behemoth with his right hand. He had the urge to give Guy a good thrashing with it.

"Aw, look at little Kakashi. Mad about some pussy on his face," Asuma drawled. Guy did the honorable thing and tried not to laugh at first, which of course only made him go cross eyed. Then he and Asuma burst into guffaws, slapping each other on the back and then Kakashi too as they hauled him out of the backseat.

Angry at first, as Guy straightened his uniform for him and Asuma said simply, "We're here," Kakashi felt himself grin beneath his mask. Though this was definitely not the birthday he would have chosen for himself, the company of these two was infinitely preferable to bad dreams alone… which, though he didn't like to admit it, he'd been having more frequently.

"Are we in time for the champagne fountain?" Kakashi offered, and Guy turned to him with such a beaming idiotic grin that Kakashi supposed it was worth it.

 **this morning**

Kakashi woke up with a raging headache. He cursed all champagne everywhere, and himself for partaking, and most of all his best friend and self-proclaimed rival Guy for coming up with these ludicrous birthday plans and also challenging him to the champagne-fountain-drinking contest the night before.

"I feel like shit," Asuma chuckled from the other bed. "How bout you Kash?"

"Same." They could see Guy outside on the balcony, already fully dressed and doing pushups. The sun was peeking around a nearby highrise.

"I shoulda stopped after a few glasses and gone out for a smoke with that redhead," Asuma said remorsefully. He rolled over toward Kakashi and reached for his lighter on the nightstand. "Anyone catch your eye?" he asked.

Kakashi shook his head.

Asuma grunted, giving him a disbelieving look. "Saw a couple of local types tryna get your attention. Pretty. Real pretty. Couple of dudes, too. Don't think you noticed, though."

Kakashi shook his head again.

"Dudes were pretty too," Asuma said more to himself than Kakashi as he rolled the other way, out of the bed, and pulled on yesterday's pants. He waved his pack of cigs in explanation, and Kakashi watched as he joined Guy on the balcony where the latter was now doing jump squats.

Kakashi lay in the bed with his arm behind his head. The previous night had been raucous but ultimately uneventful. Guy had scared off every would-be hookup within a minute of meeting them, and Asuma was only half-assing it though he'd never admit it. Kakashi had watched the interaction with the redhead carefully - she was a confident woman, had initiated things with Asuma. She knew what she wanted and all Asuma would've had to do was go smoke. Kakashi had a vivid memory of the woman's gold-lacquered nails trailing up Asuma's arm.

No, Asuma was definitely holding back, and Kakashi had to wonder if it was related to the gossip about Kurenai back in the Leaf. Kakashi smirked under his mask.

Guy had actually looked much better than usual, in Kakashi's humble platonic opinion, because he'd ditched the green jumpsuit for a black one. He'd added a leather blazer instead of the standard Konoha flak, and had put on fringed blue suede boots and a metallic gold belt. He still looked ridiculous, but it was a shiny ridiculous that seemed suited to the city and kind of gave Guy an artsy or musician type vibe. Guy's idiosyncrasies hadn't gotten a makeover though, so parties initially turned on by his avant garde attire had soon been turned off by his megawatt personality.

Kakashi had been truthful to Asuma about no one catching his eye and failing to notice those persons whose eye he'd caught. The champagne was nauseating in large amounts and Kakashi wasn't much of a gambler in love or money. All the people around he remembered as one big abrasive, sweaty, sparkly blur.

Kakashi, in truth, had been bored.

But good-naturedly so.

Just then Guy burst back into the room from the balcony.

"Who's ready for a chocolate fountain?" the green-clad taijutsu master boomed with a thrust of his hips and a finger extended toward the door like some parody of a conqueror's statue.

Kakashi winced as Guy's loudness set his head throbbing. He didn't bother reminding his pal that he hated sweets. He tried to pull the covers over his head so he could doze off again, but Guy was already ripping the comforter off the bed.

 **now**

The Pink Paradise's entry was an iron-barred door that led into a dark, close, warm tunnel of a hall that in turn opened into a vaulted room awash in dim soft coral and purple lights.

"Was there something anatomical about all that or am I imagining things," Kakashi mused despairingly to no one in particular.

"This place comes highly recommended," puffed Asuma.

Guy marched up to the greeting kiosk and smiled, which had the effect of frightening the staff into leaning away from him. A dude in a shiny shirt appraised the three of them coolly.

"Gentlemen. What's your pleasure?" he said. His voice was as silky sounding as his light bluish-green hair was silky looking. Kakashi immediately disliked him.

"Girls," Asuma said, nonplussed. He handed over their IDs. The silky guy took them politely and examined them under a small blacklight lamp.

"Hey, what's with the mask, bro?" A huge man next to the silky one said, pointing a fat thumb at Kakashi. _Must be the bouncer_ Kakashi thought, automatically visualizing how he'd take him out if it came to a fight.

"Indie comic convention in town. Didn't you hear?" Asuma lied easily, taking their IDs back with a courteous nod. He jerked his head toward Kakashi. "He's playing that dude in the film version. You know."

Kakashi had no idea what Asuma was alluding to. The only new releases he paid attention to were Icha Icha adaptations.

The bouncer's eyes widened. "That's my favorite series! Oh wow. Oh wow-hey, could I-"

"No pictures," Asuma said firmly and the bouncer crumpled in disappointment. "But you two are sweet, so we'll make an exception." Asuma winked at the teal-haired dude, who, to Kakashi's surprise, seemed to blush.

Asuma nudged Kakashi forward. He posed for an expressionless selfie with the doorman and bouncer. They thanked Asuma and Kakashi and told them they could get them some better-than-the-usual seats. The teal-haired man picked up his walkie and radioed some instructions. A minute later a petite woman in a bright pink maid outfit appeared.

"Your seats are ready, masters, welcome to Paradise! Follow me, please… this way to the VIP box!" She extended a graceful arm to draw back the gauzy curtain just past the greeting kiosk.

"Thank you, gentlemen. Yuki will take care of you. Anything you need, just let her know," the silky guy gave them a respectful bow and the bouncer jumped to hold the other curtain out of their way.

"I'm his manager!" Guy informed everyone unnecessarily, jabbing his thumb at Kakashi and puffing up his chest with self importance as he marched past first.

Asuma swaggered in coolly like he'd done it a thousand times. Kakashi stuffed his hands in his pockets and tried to follow his lead. When Yuki paused at a crowded ramp, Kakashi leaned near Asuma. "Was all that about a movie really necessary?"

"Didn't want 'em to hassle you bout the mask," Asuma replied quietly. "I know how you like to keep it on. Besides. Got us free VIP." The tanned shinobi showed his pearly whites around the cigarette dangling from his lips. It was an unapologetic smile.

They were moving again. Kakashi thought he saw a trapeze somewhere off in his left periphery. The sweet smell of perfume, some kind of incense, towering flower arrangements and ladies' hair products created a miasma that had Kakashi deeply regretting every bite of chocolate fondue. Bass assaulted his ears along with punctuating outbursts of male voices amidst the backdrop of female ones. Yuki was leading them down toward a central stage and Kakashi hesitated on the ramp… before a waiter bumped into him from behind and he had to keep going.

"My apologies, sir!" the server looked terrified that Kakashi might be angry.

"No harm done," Kakashi said distractedly. The server disappeared into the shifting crowds. _It's just like a mission_ he told himself, but his palms were sweaty and he felt like he wanted to bolt. He kept his eyes on the back of Asuma's head to avoid having to look anywhere else.

As they descended the ramp he noticed the clientele looked wealthier, and suddenly Kakashi felt underdressed. Asuma, in an embroidered shirt, red leather moto jacket and an heirloom watch fit right in. Guy of course stood out like a sore thumb but could be chalked up to "eccentric." Kakashi felt people looking at him as they were led to the VIP section and now he second-guessed leaving his mask on and his black v-neck t-shirt and nicest pair of dark jeans seemed inadequate.

Closer to the stage there was definitely a higher density of _human flesh._ Kakashi had to look at the ceiling. He took a deep breath, unsure of how to act or what was expected of him. He got the impression of a lot of bodies - female bodies - all around him, and the smells and colors were overwhelming him. Something soft and skin-like brushed up against the bare part of his arm and he actually jumped.

 _Damn Guy's scheming_ Kakashi fumed, seriously considering making a break for it. But he didn't want to make a scene. _I'd look a fool, and Guy would just drag me back._ And… the girls here would probably be offended. Running out would be disrespectful. _And damn Lady Hokage for helping these two out with her suppression potion._ Kakashi knew it'd be days before he could flicker again. He could feel Tsunade's alchemy cutting off access to the chakra points he needed for that kind of thing.

Kakashi's mind wandered to a chapter in Icha Icha that had been set in a place like this. Was that how he should act? In the novel the protagonist had seen a beautiful woman from across the room, ordered an expensive drink and had it sent to her, only to discover the woman was an employee and couldn't drink on the clock. So he'd bought a private dance with her instead, and she was embarrassed to be compelled to perform for him as an object, but she really needed the money and in truth he seemed like a decent guy and though she had no idea he _was_ actually truly interested in her as a person but he kept up the high roller facade because he was too afraid she'd-

"Sir?" A polite feminine voice cut into Kakashi's brooding. The copy ninja glanced down carefully… to see the little hostess Yuki holding out a chair for him. She was smiling, patient, with soft brown bangs framing her face, dimples, a lacey little hat and gloves… and a line of cleavage as long as Orochimaru's tongue between snowy marshmallows of breasts barely contained by the pink satin of her uniform.

"Th-thank you," Kakashi said, quickly sitting down. He thought he heard Asuma order some drinks. Guy was professing his love for Yuki, who seemed to be taking it in stride with professional giggling. Kakashi stared really hard at the table in front of him.

"Something wrong, Kash?" Asuma elbowed him as he lit a cigarette. "You're tense. Did I miss something? There aren't missing nin in here or something, are there? On my damn vacation…" Asuma glanced around.

Kakashi felt bad for worrying him. "No, nothing like that." He tried to muster up a smile for Asuma beneath his mask. "Just… getting lost in my head again!"

"Kakashi, you need to live more in the moment," Guy announced, butting into the conversation, leaning across Asuma and wrapping his arm protectively - or possessively - around Kakashi's shoulders. "You are the best kind of ninja. You come alive on the battlefield… like poetry in motion!" Guy extended an arm as though painting a picture. "You're there for your team and fully committed!... But off the field, you're a lone wolf. A solitary hunter. You bury your nose in those books of yours and never really open up… to anyone." Guy sniffled.

"Not even to me," he finished, tears starting. Right on cue the drinks arrived and Guy snatched his Cosmo up as salve to his pain.

"Would you rather be on the dude side?" Asuma said pragmatically, sipping his whisky neat.

Kakashi sighed. "No, this is… perfect. Really, guys. I just have a hard time… relaxing. Off duty."

Guy had dried his face. "Well, that's what we came for, isn't it, Asuma! Full blown, totally consuming, all-out and undeniable sweet, sweet relaaaaaaaaxation!"

Kakashi swallowed. "Right." Guy ruffled his hair.

"That's the spirit, Kakashi!"

The lights dimmed. "Looks like the next number's gonna start," Asuma said.

"Sweet baby kami," said Guy, rubbing his hands together.

"Great seats," Asuma murmured. Kakashi glanced up. They _were_ great seats. Great, expensive, wonderful, _right next to the damn stage_ seats. The chair was leather and cushiony, very nice and obviously expensive. Kakashi tried to get comfortable.

"...see _everything_ ," Guy was saying.

"Aren't these a bit… close?" Kakashi said weakly, looking back toward the rear of the room where an oasis of regular tables mocked him.

"... _smell_ everything," Guy was saying.

Kakashi blanched but no one could tell because the lights were so low and he was always that pale anyway.

"Every _thong_ , you mean." Asuma chuckled. He and Guy started laughing. Kakashi turned to his right, thinking he'd just side-eye the stage… but there was a pole to the right, sticking right up from their cocktail table.

"Wha-" Kakashi said. Outwardly his expression hadn't changed, but inside he felt like he was shaking, seeing his own doom, staring down a superior enemy.

"Hip and cool Kakashi, pretending he doesn't know what the private pole is for! Playing it coy. I like it!" Guy cackled and gave him a mega-thumbs-up.

"See something you like and we'll spring for it," Asuma said. "It's your birthday, after all."

Kakashi hoped he looked interested. He turned longingly to the back of the room again only to have someone's bare butt pass by inches from his nose. He whipped back around.

"That was an eyeful," chuckled Asuma appreciatively, craning his neck to watch the owner of the eyeful derriere walk all the way across the room.

Music started. Or had it been going already and just got louder? Kakashi honestly couldn't tell. He felt a tiny drop of sweat roll down from his temple to under his mask. He slouched down in his seat. He squirmed to the side. Then he tried leaning back.

" _Great_ seats," Asuma said again.

"Yep. We're ALL gonna feel like we have the Sharingan tonight!" Guy slapped his thigh and guffawed at his own joke. Asuma chuckled supportively. Kakashi fantasized about slapping Guy.

He couldn't get comfortable. Yuki had come to check on them. Asuma ordered a round. Time was going so slowly! Finally Kakashi just grabbed his drink and downed the entire thing in one gulp. Bourbon seared his throat. The guys were snickering over some joke and not paying any attention to him. Kakashi leaned forward, jammed his elbows onto his knees and propped his face half-hidden behind his hands. _There. Ready to begin being uncomfortable._ He waited impatiently for the bourbon to do its dirty work of either dulling his senses and easing his anxiety or tricking his brain into making this more enjoyable. Or both.

The emcee was saying something, but Kakashi only caught every other word. People assumed, because he liked smut, that he was some kind of confident smooth operator. They mistook his silence for detached suaveness, his boredom for coolness. They assumed his lack of interest in women of the Leaf stemmed from some kind of secret, expansive intimate experiences that must have happened at some point... (on foreign missions? In Anbu? Maybe he only does it with high ranking types! Maybe he's got some kind of exclusive arrangement with the Hokage(s)!)... and that these near-classified experiences had turned him off of relations with mere mortals or civilians, that he was some kind of deviant connoisseur.

 _I am picky._ That was the only grain of truth in any of the rumors.

"Get some miles on him…" Tsunade had come close to revealing a lot, but it was just Guy and Asuma, anyway. Kakashi told himself he didn't care what they knew. _They can think what they want._

Asuma clapped manfully. Guy was hooting and fist-pumping at whatever the emcee'd just said.

 _I could be reading_ Kakashi thought wistfully as the stage curtains opened.


	2. Chapter 2

"Rei! Rei! Pssst… Rei-chan!"

The brown-eyed woman blinked slowly. Her hands were paused above her head, slender fingers still holding a bobby pin. She frowned into the mirror. _Did I seriously just space out again?_ A vivid image of blue sky and clouds over a green valley danced at the edge of her consciousness. She shoved it violently back into its assigned place far, far in recesses of her brain. And mentally slammed the door on it with a vicious shove.

"I'm sorry, Yuki! Just uh, spacing out yet again." The woman laughed lightly as she hurried to finish her hairstyle.

"You. Number-One Space Cadet!" Yuki said in a silly voice, giggling as she gave Rei a formal salute.

Rei flung a hairpin at her friend without taking her eyes off the mirror. The pin lodged itself lightly in Yuki's cleavage.

"How do you do that?!" Yuki laughed, amazed. "One day, Rei. And not the champion-dart-thrower story again. One day you're gonna tell me the truth!"

"But not today," Rei said, grinning, as she checked the back of her updo with a hand mirror. Her dark green hair was swept up in a traditional style. "What were you trying to tell me Yuki?"

"Oh! Right. Wanted to give you a gooood tip! There're some real Ichiros in tonight. I heard it straight from Dante and led them down myself." The buxom hostess beamed with pride. Rei chuckled at how adorable her friend was sometimes.

"Where?" the green-haired woman said seriously.

Yuki leaned further through the dressing curtain and the hairpin fell from between her breasts, _pinging_ on the concrete floor."Box 1," she said conspiratorially. "The one in A is supposedly an actor or something!"

Rei rolled her eyes. "Did Dante tell you that?" She stood and let the dressing gown fall from her shoulders. Beneath it she wore an ornate kimono.

"Not like a huge name, an _indie_ actor."

"Right." Rei picked up an instrument from a chair and slung it over her shoulder.

"Oh Rei, you're such a skeptic," Yuki scolded. "I see your inner frown and it's going to give you wrinkles on the outside."

"Everyone gets wrinkles, Yuki!" Rei laughed. "How long do I have?"

Yuki pulled a pocketwatch from under her petticoats. "Four minutes. You were scheduled for 9 p.m. but Bonnie was a little late getting out, because they had to buff the floor after Bambee brought that guy on stage and he slipped. I hope he doesn't sue. Nothing broke, I think he slipped on his own sweat! You know how they get when Bambee makes them grind on her boba butt-"

" _Thanks,_ Yuki," Rei interrupted, smiling kindly at her friend. The other woman covered her mouth with a lace-gloved hand.

"Oopsie, sorry Rei! Time for your moment. I'll catch you after the show! Break a leg."

The pink hostess vanished through the curtain, leaving the smell of cotton candy in her absence.

Rei closed her eyes. She took a deep breath and went into a light meditation. When she opened her eyes, she felt poised and ready. She was an experienced performer in many senses of the word, moreso even than any of her coworkers knew. She coldly appraised her reflection. Hair in lacquered whorls, skin powdered to a youthful brilliance. The yellow kimono sparkled with sequins and metallic thread, a nod to old customs but definitely made for a gaudier type of show.

Everything was perfect.

Of course it was. She never did anything less than perfectly. Rei looked young with her ingenue features and even complexion, but she'd been… around. She looked delicate, with her slender wrists and smallish build, but the prettiness hid a strong will tempered by loss into a steel core and self-reliant nature.

Applause burst from the vicinity of the stage. The usual catcalls and whooping, too. Rei smiled. Bonnie'd done a hot one by the sound of it. A light blinked on the dressing table, accompanied by a buzzing sound. The thirty-second cue. Rei took a last glance at herself and headed down a dark hall to the wings, her geta making no discernable sound on the thin carpet.

…

"What is beauty?" The emcee paused, as if really waiting for an answer.

"Tits!" Some moron shouted from the back, to scattered applause. Kakashi held his head in one hand and absently spun his bourbon glass with the other. Empty. Asuma noticed and motioned for Yuki. Kakashi was pretty sure another round was a bad idea but he couldn't think of another way out of the hell he was in.

The emcee nodded sagely. "Yes, the body - especially the female one - is a profound source of beauty, as many of our lovely ladies have already proven tonight!" More applause. Men calling out the names of their favorite dancers. Guy shouting out _Yuki-chan!..._ loudest of all.

The emcee, who looked a lot like a purple version of Jiraiya, raised a gloved hand. The audience quieted. _Miraculous_ thought Kakashi. _I need this guy's panache._

"Yet. Some traditions hold that the _expectation_ of beauty - the suspense, the longing for release, the yearning for fulfillment - is the real treasure."

Kakashi's ears perked up.

"Some have raised the cultivation of unfulfilled desire to a high art form! And though we respect such tradition, here at Pink Paradise we are not so cruel."

Kakashi felt the ripple of relief flow through the room. He felt mild disappointment.

"And yet!" The emcee toyed with them. "We do recognize the raw power of delayed gratification! So please join me in welcoming to the stage Paradise's sorceress of shamisen, the avatar of lost arts, our cruel mistress of unfulfilled desires-"

Kakashi lifted his head for the first time in two and a half hours.

... _shamisen?_

"-Lady Rei! Welcome her, so that she might smile kindly on us and deign to fulfill our desires!"

Wild cheering followed the emcee's words as he theatrically bowed and re-bowed his exit, like a serf would at the advent of a monarch.

Kakashi slowly reached for his glass without looking, his eyes fixed on the stage.

Asuma nudged Guy, unnoticed by Kakashi. "I think something caught his eye. Weird thing is, she hasn't even come out yet!" The other two shinobi stifled their mirth but Kakashi seemed oblivious anyway.

The curtain drew apart, revealing a lone woman dressed up to the neck in a canary yellow kimono. Her back was to the crowd, and she cradled an instrument in her lap. Kakashi felt like he couldn't breath. Was he seeing things? He tried to remember how many bourbons he'd had but could not. The kimono looked a little blurry, so he reasoned it had been too many.

The sad notes of a shamisen rang out over the crowd. It was the polar opposite of the last act, which had started with a lasso and ended with twerking, and during which Kakashi had gotten to know the woodgrain of their table quite well. He'd glanced up once through his lashes and instantly regretted it and was certain he was scarred for life. And he still hated country music.

Kakashi watched the shamisen player's shoulders tense and relax in turn beneath the fabric of her kimono as she plucked out a melody on her instrument. _What a strange performance for a place like this_ Kakashi thought, suddenly terrified that a prick in the cheap seats would take it upon himself to interrupt the woman with some kind of lewd outburst.

 _I'll just kill him._ Kakashi blinked, realizing what he'd just thought. _Definitely too much of this._ He started to put his drink down, but just then the dais upon which the woman sat rotated around and forward, bringing her front side into view.

"Nice effect!" Asuma puffed, noting the stage mechanics, not the woman.

"Eh, not my type," Guy said, slouching back into his seat and pretending like he wasn't looking around for Yuki.

Kakashi's glass slipped from his fingers and crashed to the floor, shattering all over his shoes.

"Euh?! Wha-hey, Kakashi, what was that?" Guy exclaimed. The background music had swelled, swallowing the Green Beast's words in a crescendo, but the copy ninja wasn't listening anyway.

"Kash, yo, you spilled your drink-" Asuma started, then, seeing what he took as his friend's "enraptured" face, motioned at a passing busboy instead.

"We'll clean it up immediately, sir!" the busser whispered, and Asuma pushed a bill into his palm.

A new drink was brought and the old one cleaned up without Kakashi registering any of it.

When the dais had brought the woman to the fore of the stage, the lighting on her hair changed and what Kakashi had thought was raven hair in an old-fashioned geisha's style was actually dark green… _dark green._

The recorded music became a shamisen-tinged slow pop tune, and the woman put down her own instrument to strong applause. Kakashi needn't have worried, despite the number being far from the usual club fare the crowd was transfixed. The woman was serene, elegant, enchanting… the women wanted to be like her and the men wanted to please her. The shamisen player slowly raised her head as the music's bass increased.

Kakashi lurched forward and knocked his newly refreshed glass of bourbon off the table and onto the floor, where it promptly shattered.

"Kakashi!" Guy scolded, reaching out to steady his best friend.

"Wow, she's beautiful," someone behind their box said. Guy felt Kakashi's muscles bunch under his hand and wondered what the hell was going on.

"I… I need to go," Kakashi stammered out. But his eyes were still fixed on the stage.

"Probably needs to piss. He's had a lot," Asuma said, tipping another server who was already cleaning the new mess.

The woman onstage was fingering the deep V made by the overlapping front of her kimono. It had looked demure from the back, but now Kakashi could see skin all the way down to her sternum. "I gotta-" Kakashi tried to loosen Guy's iron grip and edge around the table toward the aisle.

"I'll take him after this," Guy interrupted. "Don't wanna walk out now and be rude!" He slammed Kakashi back down into his seat with one hand. "You're mature, Kakashi, you can wait till the lady's done, can't you?"

Kakashi didn't answer. He just stared dazedly at the stage, exposed eye fixed on the shamisen player who was now turning slowly to show her back again.

The music changed once more, smoothly, into a dancey number by a popular American artist. The lights changed, too, from soft and elegant to colder flashes of bluish white that unwontedly reminded Kakashi of his one and only original move…

"I really need to-" he began, but both Asuma and Guy's hands clamped him in place before he could even twitch.

The shamisen player was slowly lowering the back of her kimono now, exposing her neck, then her shoulder blades, then her spine…

Kakashi desperately wanted to look away, close his eyes, faint, anything-

But he found that another part of him wanted to keep watching, just as badly.

The yellow kimono was draped down to her lower back now, exposing the top of some Western-style lingerie - a corset - also yellow. Her hair was still up, showing all of the nape of her neck… framed perfectly by the line of her dark green hair. She moved her hips slowly, purposefully, in time with the music. The kimono fell from her body, and she turned to look over her shoulder…

{ _and everybody's watching her}_

Right at Asuma.

{ _but she's looking at you}_

Kakashi had scooted as far right as possible, into the shadow cast by a large potted palm. Asuma, meanwhile, was sitting right under a light. Naturally her eye would fall on him. Kakashi's tactic had worked. His fellow shinobi were still holding him in his seat, preventing him from leaving, but at least now he was basically invisible from stage.

The intense stare was unmistakable. The beauty mark under her right eye was unmistakable.

"Wow," Asuma breathed under his cigarette, "She's looking right at me."

"Wow," breathed Guy into his sixth Cosmo, "Look at the ruffly… uh… ruffles!"

Kakashi refused, mentally steeling himself to keep his line of sight at hip level and above. He felt irritated at Asuma for no good reason but forgot the next second because the woman started taking down her hair.

Pin by pin, she swayed her… ruffles… in front of Asuma while alternating between shyly looking down, unpinning a lock of her hair, and making daring eye contact with Asuma, whose cigarette was dangling precariously from his open mouth.

Kakashi had had enough. The blue lights flashed across the dancer's skin and she lifted her arms gracefully as the rest of her hair tumbled down. _Stay on mission_ Kakashi told himself. _Quick, need to be quick…_

{ _we go fast with the game we play}_

The copy ninja ignored the throbbing in his head and surreptitiously used his free hand to expose his Sharingan eye. Guy and Asuma had gotten caught up in the performance and failed to notice. Kakashi tore his gaze away from the stage and scanned the areas surrounding it.

{ _who knows why it's gotta be this way}_

 _There_. His augmented sight easily showed him where the main electrical box and line were located. The dancer was seated on the dais again, beckoning Asuma to join her. Kakashi gritted his teeth, reaching slyly under the table for a piece of broken glass the waiters had missed. The stage bouncers came over and motioned Asuma to go up.

{ _we say nothing more than we need}_

"Should I do it?" Asuma mumbled, to himself mostly.

"Of course!" Guy released his grip on Kakashi in his excitement to propel Asuma onto the stage. Kakashi's fingers closed around the piece of glass.

{ _I say, "Your place," when we leave}_

The dancer was loosening her corset.

{ _baby, this is what you came for}_

Kakashi took aim. _One shot_.

The adrenaline had cleared his head. Asuma was onstage.

{ _lightning strikes every time she moves}_

The dancer was inviting him to kiss her foot.

{ _and everybody's watching her}_

Guy was whooping it up. _Breathe._ The woman… standing, guiding Asuma's hands to her laces, while she danced…

Kakashi channeled his chakra, sure of his aim, and with an unseen flick of his wrist sent a charged shard of glass at the electrical of the stage, severing the line…

{ _but she's looking at…}_

Just before he released his chakra he thought he saw the dancer freeze, and jerk her head up in his direction…

{ _...you, oh, oh-}_

The lights went out.


	3. Chapter 3

Someone screamed.

"That's ridiculous. It's just a little blackout!" Guy said, his voice thundering through the room since the music had cut out, too.

The crowd seemed to take Guy's words to heart as there followed more confusion than panic.

Asuma _poofed_ back into his seat, sounding bewildered. "Is this part of the-"

"Where's the woman?" Kakashi demanded.

"Who? What, the dancer? I think she went backstage. As soon as the lights went she stopped the routine and the emcee came out to help her."

"Ah," Kakashi said. Asuma scratched his goatee, wondering why his buddy sounded so damn satisfied.

Guy leaned over and peered through the darkness. "A shame, these technical difficulties. I'd really started to enjoy that performance, despite my initial reservations."

"Mmmm hmm," the copy ninja agreed in a Cheshire-like tone. Guy squinted at Kakashi's form in the dark. The silvery-haired jonin was reclined in his chair, one leg propped on the other and his hands laced behind his head - the portrait of a man at ease.

Guy grinned. "Why Kakashi, I think you're finally starting to relax! A little chaos, it makes him feel right at home! Yes, that's my Eternal Rival for you."

"Wonder how long it'll take them to fix this tech issue," Asuma grumbled.

"A long time," Kakashi said happily.

Asuma and Guy exchanged looks, but "the man who copied a thousand jutsus" didn't notice. He was looking up at the ceiling and humming, a smile on his face beneath the mask.

…

"Vega, what was that all about?!" Rei flung her kimono over a dressing chair and stormed over to a tall man in a suit who was already surrounded by a group of chattering girls. Luckily the back of house had a different control panel so they still had light in the dressing rooms.

"Watch out, the Lady's mad," snickered a tall tanned woman with impossibly long legs. Her wavy hair was wreathed in exotic flowers and she wore a miniscule bikini made entirely of shells.

Rei crossed her arms as she came to a stop in front of the suit. "Leilani's right. I _am_ upset." The green-haired woman was far shorter than the man in the suit but her ferocity made them evenly matched. "Fixing _all_ technical concerns was a pillar of our contract renegotiations last month!"

"Rei, Rei - I know this was frightening but-"

"I was not frightened."

"But accidents do happen," the suited man said soothingly. He extended a charitable hand toward Rei and strove to make eye contact with her. Finally she threw a glance at him. He smiled.

"I assure you, Rei - and the rest of you dear girls - that this had nothing to do with past structural… weaknesses. We aren't sure what exactly happened but my people are on it now and I've already got a specialist on the way. We'll get this fixed and won't let anyone go out there until we know it's absolutely safe." He smiled even more broadly, at all of them.

"And just to put a nice finish on a rough night… I've cleared out Skyloft for the night and had the chefs prepare an appreciation dinner for all of you!" The suit put a hand over his heart. Bonnie gasped in excitement. Someone else sighed audibly in admiration. Rei turned her head and had to exert extreme control over her facial expression not to roll her eyes.

"Won't it be dark?" Bambee asked.

"Candlelight," Vega said smoothly, rotating his hand like a magician casting a spell. Some of the girls _oooh'd._

She felt Vega looking at her. Putting on a pleasant, neutral face, Rei turned to the group. "You heard him - no one will be performing till it's _absolutely safe_. Which I hope is soon, cause… I don't know about you, but _damn_ do I need those tips!" The other dancers cracked up and Rei spread her hands. "Let's go eat that free dinner!"

The group broke up, some girls heading straight up to be first to Skyloft, others going to their dressing tables and lockers to gather their things or change clothes first. Rei and Vega were left alone in the middle of the room.

"You weren't hurt, were you?" Vega inquired seriously, his gorgeous dark violet eyes intense below a brow furrowed in concern. Rei looked down at her nails.

"No, I'm fine. Thank you."

Vega brushed invisible lint off the raven lapel of his Dolce & Gabbana suit. "I'm glad," he replied simply.

"Someone sat on my shamisen in the confusion, though."

"I'm so sorry. I'll buy you a new- I… I mean… _Paradise_ will see that it's replaced immediately." Vega looked away now, scanning the mirrors for imaginary dust.

"No-!" Rei started, then caught herself. "I'd rather, if possible, that this one be repaired…"

Vega stared down at her sweet face, so perfectly framed by that luxurious hair that switched from emerald, to dull moss, to imperial jade depending on the lighting. So unique. Like a rare gem.

Rei glanced up. "That instrument in particular has-"

"-sentimental value," Vega finished for her. "Don't give it another thought. Consider it fixed." Rei nodded, and Vega took the chance of reaching out and gently taking hold of her elbow with his long, slender, strong fingers. "With that off your mind, he said softly. "Do you think you can enjoy dinner now?"

Rei felt her body having some kind of reaction to her boss's touch, though her first instinct had been to shy away. She stayed still and let him keep up the contact, knowing he crossed a line on purpose. Her face gave nothing away but prettiness.

"Dinner will be nice," she said evenly, stepping back with a polite nod. "All us girls work so hard… it's a great way to sharpen the appetite."

Vega raised a well-groomed eyebrow. "Yes. So it is."

Rei smiled sweetly again. "I'm going to change. I'll see up you up there."

Vega only nodded and kept staring at her, so Rei turned around and walked away, knowing she was giving him a freebie look at her butt but not really having any better options. _He's looking alright,_ she glowered to herself feeling her sixth sense tingling. _Should of kept the kimono with me._

 _Ah well. Shoulda woulda coulda_ Rei chuckled as she reached her dressing area and determinedly opened the door to the changing room. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Vega only now turning away to walk up the stairs.

 _Pervert,_ Rei scolded in her mind. _He is gorgeous though. My gorgeous, skebe boss._ There was a rumor that before he'd bought into the club he'd been a fighter on the UFC hopeful circuit. A different rumor claimed he was an undercover agent - and an assassin. Rei shrugged at that - anyone could be anything, no one knew it better than she. Vega did have an athletic build under those pompous suits, and according to Grace he was grade-A cut, ripped beyond the level of your everyday run of the mill romance novel cover model.

Rei shrugged at that, too. _What's being ripped if you can't back it up?_ Muscles were supposed to be _for_ something, not just looking pretty. There was something about a guy who was fit, but also demonstrated prowess at something. Something interesting. Prowess at lifting weights didn't count. _Strength should be for something, too… building things, or helping others… carrying some-_

Rei stopped cold as she realized where her thoughts had been drifting.

"Rei!" Yuki's voice was a bell in the fog. The green-haired woman turned around gratefully as the pink hostess ran up to give her a huge hug. "It's crazy out there. Dante said I could take fifteen. So many clients to help! Did you see the Ichiros? One of them kept breaking glasses, right during your show. The actor, I think. Did you hear? I hope it didn't break your concentration..."

Rei slipped a loose yeĺlow dress over her corset. She reached up and under and yanked off the ruffled panties, tossing them in her bag.

"No I didn't notice, Yuki." On went some white cotton briefs instead.

"Which one did you think was cutest? The actor, I bet. He seems like your type," Yuki giggled.

Rei slipped into some white flats and grabbed her bag. "Uh, I don't know?" She ushered Yuki towards the stairs before the girl's penchant for ceaseless talking cost them a free nice dinner. "I mean, wasn't that the guy I brought on stage?" The man had been tan and well-built, unique and with a nice sense of style. The facial hair wasn't Rei's cup of tea but some girls she knew went positively gaga over the bad-boy look.

"Oh no, that one is handsome too but he's the… the um, well, I'm not really sure what that one does but he isn't the actor."

"I thought you said 1A…" Rei said, confused, as they clattered up the stairs.

"Yes, that's where the actor was. On the far… your left. Then the one you brought up, then the _manager."_

Rei frowned. She prided herself on her memory. "I don't get it," she said. "I must be getting old, Yuki," she laughed."I only saw two."

"The actor is kinda hard to miss," Yuki said, genuinely puzzled. Her pal Rei was one of the savviest dancers and the sharpest person she'd ever met. "He's very tall."

Rei _hmm_ d a reply, taking the last steps two at a time. _I hope there's lobster._

Yuki paused in her description to puff for breath as she followed Rei gamely, DDs bouncing.

They reached the landing. "He's only wearing a t-shirt and jeans…" Yuki continued as Rei reached for the employee door into Skyloft. "But his hair is this odd pale color and the weirdest thing is he's wearing a m-"

The door swung open before Rei's fingers even touched it. There was Vega, smiling like a fox, a rose in his left hand.

"I hope you don't mind, Rei, that I presumed to set the balcony for two." He slowly looked her over in a way that was kind of gross yet also flattering. Then he grinned at them both. "Yuki, of course, is welcome to join us."

The hostess squealed. "Oooh, Rei! I've never even set foot on the Diamond Balcony before! Isn't this fun?"

Rei set her smile to 85% pretty / 15% nervous. "Um, yes, lots of _fun…"_

Vega swooped in and took her arm, leading her past the buffet. Rei cringed as out of the corner of her eye she saw heads lift to follow their movement across the room and out through the French doors to the balcony. _This is going to affect my position with the other girls_ she thought in annoyance.

But it was a _nice_ dinner. The balcony had a great view of the courtyard and street, and well… her boss _was_ gorgeous.

 _I am only human after all_ Rei mused as she looked out into the night. She felt like she was forgetting something. Yuki had been talking a lot on the stairs. _Maybe I missed something._ For some reason her mind went to just before the lights went out. She could have sworn she felt a chakra flare from the palm plant at the corner. The flare had components that felt somehow familiar… and though Rei tried to keep it away, the thread of thought dragged a memory to her anyway.

Kakashi's chakra. Cool and hot at the same time. Pinpricks of light in a sea of dark blue. Rei felt her eyes moisten as she took in the cityscape. _Lights. Lights in the dark. I wonder what he's doing now._

There was absolutely no reasonable explanation for the chakra signature of the palm plant except that perhaps that was near where the short started and the electrical surge had coincidentally shared some arrangements similar to Ka-

Similar to _that person's_ chakra nature _._ Rei resolved to stop this. _Just erase him from your mind…_ something she'd considered a thousand times…

"Rei?" A gentle shake of her bare shoulder startled Rei back to the moment at hand.

"S-sorry, I've just been really tired lately," Rei looked away from the cityscape, smiled at Yuki and gave a demure nod to Vega, who was still standing, waiting for her to sit first. Rei sat, realizing it felt as though she'd been spacing out for hours when really it had only been a couple seconds.

"A toast," said Vega, raising his glass of sparkling rosé. "To unfulfilled desires."

Rei drained her glass, ignoring the surprised looks from her dining companions.

She smiled prettily at Vega. "Got any tequila?"


	4. Chapter 4

**_Note: This chapter contains a scene of "attempted" sexual assault. I just don't like ppl to get surprised by anything they are uncomfortable with. Cheers!_**

Kakashi was staked out across the street from the Pink Paradise, hidden in the crenellations of the patisserie, having the best birthday weekend of his life.

It was 5 a.m., Asuma and Guy were still sleeping off the pills Kakashi had slipped them last night, and he was free to snoop.

The club hadn't been able to reopen Saturday night - the electrical damage was too extensive. Kakashi chuckled to himself on that point. It was a gleeful, self-satisfied chuckle. _A job well done._

But as the minutes dragged on and he squatted in silence next to the rooftop pigeons, his mien turned serious.

 _What the hell was I thinking._

His memories of the previous night felt raw and too intense, jumbled and piled like a trashed jigsaw puzzle. He didn't want to pull any particular piece out of the mess for fear of what he'd see when he flipped it over. So for now he left it in chaos and put it aside.

One thing was certain: _It was her_.

Kakashi wasn't sure what to do about that either. Never in a million years would he have expected a chance run-in like this to happen… never would he have orchestrated such a reunion… he was fine with martyrdom, with things unfinished and unrequited. He had resigned (or resolved) never to see this person again in his lifetime.

But now… Now that this _had_ happened, what, if anything, should be done about it?

"I'm stalking her workplace." Kakashi felt it best to start with the obvious. He silently chastised himself for his actions but then an image of Jiraiya floated by in his mind, tittering " _Heehee… research!"_ and Kakashi felt somewhat vindicated. _This is much more noble than that… isn't it?_

Kakashi decided to move on. "She's become… a… str… strip…" He found he had difficulty with the breadth of the job title. "She's a dancer," he told the pigeons, who cooed skeptically.

"She's beautiful." That slipped out, and had no bearing on the mission.

"She's good at what she does." Also superfluous? _No._ "Perhaps she enjoys the job…"

That was relevant. Wasn't it?

Kakashi shook his head. He actually had no idea where he was going with this. What was the point of analyzing something when you had no goal? Why reason something out when you didn't know what you were doing it for?

The pigeons got bored of him and flew away. A truck pulled up in front of _Paradise._

Kakashi frowned. _Engineering specialists from Lightning._ And with them, a tall, ponytailed guy in an expensive suit. Kakashi narrowed his eyes. _I've seen those stats somewhere…_ He pulled his bingo book from his vest and flipped through it.

 _Like I thought._ Kakashi's eyes quickly absorbed the info on the page. _But what's he doing here?_

The day had just gone from great to intensely annoying. _Those engineers will have this place open by tonight_ Kakashi grudgingly acknowledged. And now he was aware of a dangerous assassin in the vicinity of his Hana…

Kakashi shook his head, astounded at what he'd just been thinking. " _Mine"...? Ha!_ Nothing could be further from the truth. _Well, if she's in danger, though… aren't I obligated to look into it?_

Something wet splattered onto Kakashi's sleeve.

Kakashi looked up, a dangerous glint in his eye. "Alright, I get it! You want your spot back. Look, I'm leaving." He gave a last glare to the circling pigeons before he jumped from the roof, intent on changing his shirt back at the hotel before he implemented the next part of his plan…

…

Rei lay in her bed, just thinking. It was early in the morning, she hadn't slept well, and part of her was simply burned out.

 _Last night was way too fast_. She glared angrily at the ceiling of her studio. This would change things. She'd underestimated Vega's… _arduous_ _tendencies_ … and now she had to react.

Rei began to go over what had happened, in case she'd overlooked anything.

They were dining on the balcony. After several rounds of tequila shots and her acting more and more tipsy, Vega had told Yuki that Dante was looking for her, mad that she was way over her break time. Yuki had dashed out, leaving Rei alone with Vega.

He'd gotten up from his seat, cornered her one side of the balcony.

"You know I want you," he'd said, cupping her chin in his hand and forcing her head up to look him in the eyes.

"No need to blush, it's just you and me," he said. Rei remembered thinking, _it's tequila-flush, not blush, genius…_

He was good at his game, though, she had to admit. Rei recalled how he'd grabbed her wrist, touching the pressure point so she'd involuntarily let go of her cocktail glass. He'd caught the glass before it'd gone far.

 _Definitely not civilian reflexes._ He'd done all that to show her he could overpower her if he wanted to, expecting it'd impress her, turn her on and/or help otherwise coerce her into acquiescing to his desires.

Then he'd just gone for it. Which, in retrospect, seemed like a slip - a loss of control - on his part.

Rei recalled how he'd flung the glass over the rail. She remembered hearing a distant voice shout out, " _Ouch_! _A harbinger of a youthful riot, no doubt!"_ She'd registered it as odd at the time. But then Vega had pushed himself up against her, forcing her into leaning back on the rail, and she'd had to really work to stay focused.

He tangled his hand in her hair before he yanked her head back so she was exposed over the edge of the balcony. Then he slid his other hand down the side of her breast and ribs and hip and rump until his fingers dug into her thigh right below her ass and her jerked her leg up to put her even more off balance.

 _Then he kissed me._ And it was fine as kisses go, tender at first, a strange contrast to his rough handling. His lips just brushed hers, and then he sucked her lower one a bit, and then his kiss became more like his touch and he forced her mouth open to receive his tongue.

Rei had counted to thirty. It was a long first kiss. When he paused for breath and pulled back, she was ready.

Her hand snapped up and slapped him across the face like a biting snake, leaving red trails across his perfect bone structure.

Rei could see the other girls watching through the French doors as she knew they would be, their expressions ranging from shocked to horrified to jealous.

Vega turned on her like a snake himself, eyes blazing cobalt. He grabbed her arm, but just then Yuki burst through the doors.

"Rei! Look, the actor's down in the courtyard with his friends, I didn't want them to leave without you getting a chance to-oh, excuse me, Mr. Vega! Am I interrupting something? I'm so sorry Rei!"

Rei smirked to herself. Yuki wasn't half as dim as people thought. _Brilliant, Yuki_. Not like she'd been in any real trouble, but Rei'd learned long ago not to ever turn down the timely help of an ally.

Vega whirled on Yuki, giving Rei the opening she needed.

She burst into tears.

Pushing past both Vega and Yuki, Rei ran sobbing through the watching crowd of dancers, straight to the Skyloft exit. She listened carefully to the other girls' murmurs as she pushed open the door.

" _I can't believe he did that!"_

" _Poor Rei…"_

" _Serves her right."_

" _Good for her, fighting back!"_

" _Flirty slut got what she wanted."_

Rei smiled to herself as she escaped to the stairwell.

The girls would be divided in their reactions, but that was the best that could be hoped for given how publically this had played out. All she needed was _some_ support, and most of the vocal girls were her friends. She'd earned their trust by advocating for - and successfully winning - better working conditions for the staff.

Rei had gone to her dressing room thinking work was over for the night, but how wrong she'd been…

 **last night**

"Ouch!"

Kakashi glanced back to see Guy rubbing his head. "A harbinger of a youthful riot, no doubt!" Guy was laughing and holding up a glass. Kakashi had no idea how neither Guy's head nor the glass had taken any damage. He glanced upward. A balcony. A flash of green hair? Kakashi squinted. Someone having a party that was for sure.

"Kids these days," Asuma grinned. Kakashi looked at the balcony once more, but it seemed to have quieted down.

 _They're not reopening tonight. She's safe. I'll be back tomorrow to make sure._

"C'mon, Kash, let's go. Maybe you get invited up there next time, eh?" Asuma winked and rubbed his belly. "I'm starving."

Guy already had several brochures out in each hand. "What luck! There are no less than twenty-seven eating establishments within a five-minute walk at which we can regain our youthful glow!" Guy started reading off options. "Curry? Katsu? Curry katsu? Ramen? Pork ramen? Barbecue? Italian? An izakaya! A steakhouse? Udon, perhaps, or soba? If you prefer sushi…"

Kakashi slowly started after Asuma and Guy's fading voice, feeling like something was holding him back. He paused, listening, but it was pretty quiet now.

 _What could happen?_ He told himself he'd taken care of things for the night. It'd be fine.

…

Rei had been in her dressing room, gathering her things and pondering her next moves with Vega, when the door crashed open.

Not slammed open, or forcefully thrown open, but literally kicked-off-its-hinges-destroyed. Rei jumped back onto the dressing table, shielding her face with her arms, and inwardly rolled her eyes at the melodrama and vulgarity.

But this was real and she needed to concentrate. _Get your head in the game_ she reprimanded herself.

" _Rei."_ Vega said it like a caress, but his eyes were murderous. Rei felt a shiver run down her spine. She looked up at him with wide eyes as he stalked towards her, taking his time, letting her wonder what he was going to do.

 _Seeing if I'll break._

Rei bit her lip and edged back nervously until she was up against the dressing table mirror with nowhere to go. Yet she remained staunchly silent. No apologies nor whimpers escaped her. She looked up at Vega, frightened but stubborn.

Vega felt his blood running hot. _I'll just have to fuck an apology out of her._ His lips twisted in a smirk and he reveled in how Rei's whole body tensed in response. She looked around for a last-ditch escape but there was none. Everyone had gone home for the night. Vega had locked this wing from the inside. The dressing room was far too small for her to run from him.

He'd reached the dressing table. She was perched on it like a trapped animal, legs curled up to one side and her arms still guarding her face and chest.

Vega, with a flippant smile, reached out one hand and grabbed her knee. He yanked it to the side, forcing her legs apart and exposing the white underwear she had on.

He laughed as he held her there, taking his time, just staring at her panties and shaking his head.

"A little chaste for a stripper, don't you think?" he said as he lightly ran his pinky finger along the elastic that circled her right leg.

Now Rei whimpered, and he rewarded her by grabbing a handful of her yellow dress and ripping it straight down the front. Her bosom spilled out, held in check by the yellow satin corset she'd had on for the show. Vega was delighted she still had it on. He adored that costume.

"Stop. Please. I don't want this." Rei didn't have to fake the last words that came out in a gasp because he pressed himself between her legs, right up against the dressing table, and jerked her hips forward to meet him.

"Of course you don't," Vega purred. He'd ditched his suit jacket and his shirt was open, revealing a hint of the infamous snake tattoo that circled his torso. He still had his suit pants on, and the pants were tight. The wool gabardine was stretched to its limit in its effort to accommodate him.

Rei blinked, momentarily distracted by her estimate of the size of the… impending intrusion… that was currently hugging it out with the crotch of her briefs.

Calculations. The worst that could happen was _the worst case scenario._ Which luckily Rei had never experienced to date, yet which she was fully prepared to face as a job hazard in the same way that men of similar professions were always "ready to die."

Vega bent down to kiss her, and Rei burst into tears again. Not a little trickle of pretty hentai weeping, but a full-on, stormy, snot-nosed tsunami of sobbing that startled Vega into backing off an inch.

"IS THIS WHAT YOU THINK I WANT," she sobbed at an ear-splitting volume. Rei grabbed Vega's shirt and actually pulled him closer - so she could blow her nose on the expensive silk.

Aghast, Vega backed off another three inches and grabbed her wrists - not to pin her down, but to keep her from ruining more of his outfit.

"Stop tha-" he began, but Rei wasn't finished.

"YOU THINK I'M A SLUT," she screamed, breaking loose of his grip and jumping off the dressing table like a banshee. She curled into a ball ten feet away from him near the dressing room door. Then she turned and glared, flinging both of her shoes at him in turn. He dodged, of course, but his expression was bewildered.

"I hate myself!" Rei wailed. "All I wanted was for you to like me! I thought _if only he'd ask me out…_ And I did, I did try to get your attention I admit it, but I was just hoping maybe we could have dinner alone or take a walk in the park or go to the zoo or maybe Bed, Bath, and Beyond then the library and gelato-"

She sprang to her feet with a quickness that had Vega backing up. "But now instead of taking me out you're here trying to r-" she pointed an accusatory finger.

" _Ravish_ me like some kind of bad romance novel, and, and-"

Once again Rei broke down sobbing. Vega stared at her openmouthed. Any ardor he'd felt had frozen over and he really, really just wanted her to _shut. Up._

"I… I did take you to dinner!"

"A FREE DINNER DOESN'T COUNT!"

Vega felt himself on the verge of a migraine. "Rei, I do like you, I do, I-"

"You're just saying that." She was lying facedown on the floor, weeping inconsolably into the thin rug. Her beautiful hair was dishevelled and her dress, of course, ruined. Vega was surprised to find himself kneeling by her side.

"Rei, Rei. Stop crying." The crying increased in volume. " _Please stop_ crying."

A sniffle. The crying seemed to lessen slightly.

"I made a mistake. I'll take you to dinner."

The crying stopped.

A sniffle.

Vega held his breath. Rei rolled over and sat up. She looked up at him with bright, soulful, hopeful eyes. The dress had fallen completely off of her now and she looked gorgeous with her hair mussed and her body all but naked. Vega felt his desire returning but quickly squelched it.

Rei leaned forward, her breasts dangerously close to pulsing right out of the bustier with her next breath. Her brown eyes shone brightly. Her lips parted as she tilted her face up toward Vega's.

His head spun. _Now she wants to kiss me?_

But then she turned her face, missing his lips by a hair's breadth, and instead, she whispered into his ear.

" _Make sure the restaurant has lobster."_


	5. Chapter 5

**Present. 7 a.m. Sunday.**

Kakashi swung down from the hotel roof and onto the balcony, slipping into their room through the crack he'd left open in the sliding door. Guy and Asuma were just starting to stir in bed. Kakashi ignored them, heading straight to his pack to pull out a spare uniform. He was still irritated by the more serious turn the day had taken, but it was also somehow calming - giving him something to accomplish, grounding him in familiar routine. He was definitely more at ease investigating a tangible threat than avoiding naked strange women or thinking his way around a relationship he wasn't even in.

"Kakashi?" Guy sat up, rubbing his bleary eyes.

"Go back to sleep Guy," Kakashi ordered.

Guy stared blankly. His usually crisp ebony bowl cut was splayed over his head in all directions. His eyes twitched dully. "Is our vacation over?"

"Just for me," Kakashi said.

"Oh good," Guy lay back down. "I was with Yuki." Guy said plaintively, clearly out of it. The effects of the sleeping pill were obviously still in his system.

Kakashi checked his pouches and adjusted a few things. Guy raised his head once more.

"Wait - Kakashi, where are you going?" he called.

The copy ninja was already perched on the balcony railing. He'd left the sliding door wide open to air out the room.

"To work," Kakashi replied. _Gotta get back to Paradise before Hanare does._ He jumped off the balcony and disappeared.

Guy was puzzled. But then he remembered he'd left Yuki waiting at the elephant ride and he was supposed to bring her back a mango shave ice with coconut sprinķles. He rolled over in bed and shut his eyes.

…

Rei had finally dragged herself out of bed and into the shower. She turned the water up to nearly-scalding and let it try to burn some life into her.

The tantrum she'd thrown with Vega the previous night had really taken it out of her. She didn't have to fake the desperation - the stress was real and after the adrenaline had left her system she'd nearly collapsed. She had been mildly surprised she hadn't missed her stop on the train.

The water stung her scalp, drenching her. She sullenly picked up the bodywash and sponge and started lathering up. _Just another day in the life… romancing serial killers and showing strangers my tits._

She sighed, deeply.

The shower felt good. She soaped everything and shaved everything. She massaged her own feet and sulked in the bottom of the tub awhile. She thought about masturbating but it seemed too much of a hassle. She shut the water off and got out. _I'll take extra time flossing instead._

A little while later Rei emerged from the bathroom steamy and refreshed. Good dental hygiene was woefully underrated.

She made coffee, and fried some eggs. She heated up leftover portuguese sausage.

She ate breakfast alone by the window while skimming _The Economist_ and then re-reading Vega's file. She was grateful that at least this time the intel had been good, or she wouldn't have known about his woman troubles (stemming from childhood mother issues) nor his stress-induced migraine headaches.

She finished eating and spent another forty-five minutes looking at a fashion magazine and deciding what to wear to work for the day.

Around 9 a.m. she was almost ready to go. She looked in her full-length mirror and gave herself the stamp of approval. The dress was too tight to be elegant and a ridiculously aggressive shade of red. It made her hair look extra rich and green, and though the dress's cut was conservative the way it clung to every curve and nook of her body made it borderline inappropriate… but not quite.

Perfect work attire. "Merry Christmas," she told her reflection, sneering at what Vega's reaction would be to her new look.

She put on steel-heeled stilettos. No demure flats today. _I want my damn lobster_ she thought as she put large sapphire studs in her ears. Guys like this, they behaved better when you flaunted that you did pretty well for yourself. Or at least that you didn't care too much about _their_ money.

"What good is conspicuous consumption if you can't back it up," Rei muttered to herself, thinking about how so many rich guys weren't half as wealthy as they postured. She chose a silver clutch that could double as a bludgeon in a pinch. The shoes, too, were dangerous. She'd once stabbed an enemy in the throat with one of those heels.

Her hair was a bit wavy since she'd let it air dry. She finished things off with a little mascara and red lip stain. Better to go light on the face with the dress so over the top.

She spritzed on a delicate perfume with vanilla and jasmine notes in her hair and all the secret places. Jasmine was Vega's favorite scent, according to the file.

 _Why does he always carry around roses, then?_ Rei wondered. Something to find out.

Her reflection looked ready. Rei noticed her butt looked a little tired so she did some impromptu squats. The exercise put more color in her cheeks. _Better… worth a seafood dinner?_ She raised a brow at herself. She figured she was aging pretty well. She was actually older than most of the other dancers, but looked younger.

 _My eyes look different, though…_

 _...I… I wonder what Kakashi would think of me, like this…_

Rei blinked. It had happened again. "I'm definitely deleting him tonight," she snapped at the mirror, but her mind wasn't obeying. _He never tried to find me_ she thought sadly. _Perhaps he already had someone in_ his _heart._

She fell back, uneasily, into her memory of that kiss. His lips, shrouded by his mask, still tingling with energy through the cloth, still resting on hers a moment, testing, lingering, before he jumped up and started yelling at the kids.

Rei didn't even realize she'd started smiling there in front of the mirror. Kakashi's body had been pressed up hard against hers, nearly all of his weight on top of her, if only for a moment.

It was brief, but she'd felt his split second hesitation, the mounting tension in his muscles… the easy way their bodies seemed to simply fit together…

Rei snapped out of it when she felt herself blushing. _That's it,_ she fumed, spinning around and heading back into the bathroom. _Deletion. Tonight._ She glared at her pink face as she opened the vanity, gritting her teeth.

A second round of flossing was needed.

At 9:30 Rei left the apartment, teeth immaculate and mind totally focused on work.

…

Kakashi was engrossed in his stakeout by the time the 10:05 train pulled into the nearby station. He'd concealed himself in a tree that gave him a good view of Pink Paradise's employee entrance and the surrounding approaches. He heard the station horn and somehow he _knew_ she was on that train.

He'd watched Vega escort the engineers inside earlier in his recon, so Hanare wasn't in any immediate danger from the assassin. Kakashi watched the stream of tourists, students, salarymen and professional women flow around the blocks, down side streets, and through the plaza. He was scannìng the sea of neutral colors for a pop of green hair when something red caught the edge of his vision. When he turned to check it out he nearly fell out of the tree.

It was Hanare. Like he'd never seen her.

Her hair was wavy and she was wearing a tight-fitting red dress that seemed to conceal everything and nothing at the same time as it stretched over her curves. He was used to seeing her in shinobi sandals, but today she had on high heels that made her look tall and dangerous.

Kakashi's memories of her had included the bohemian street performer look, and the soft, conservative dress she had on when they spent the day together. Until last night, the most he'd seen were her bare shoulders. And last night's ruffly yellow bustier combo was certainly enticing, but in Kakashi's opinion even that was less blatantly sensual than this red outfit.

He reached up and adjusted his forehead protector, feeling a bit warm under the mask. He tried, and failed, to _not_ notice the shadows that curved between Hanare's full breasts and between her thighs. As she walked the dress seemed to highlight all the "attractions" and Kakashi wasn't sure if he was still doing surveillance or if he was just ogling her.

Just then Vega and the engineers appeared through a service entrance. Hanare was walking up to the plaza headed for the employee door. One of the engineers saw her and did a double take, the other looked up and then actually dropped his clipboard.

Vega turned to see what the fuss was about and froze. He stared for several seconds as Hanare got closer. Kakashi watched the tall assassin slowly reach up and adjust his collar, then his hair that he wore in a low ponytail. Kakashi regarded the other man coolly, a touch of disdain in his thoughts.

 _Hana doesn't care about that stuff._

She was much closer now. The engineers gave slight bows and called out polite greetings of "Good morning, miss" and "Lovely day, isn't it ma'am." Kakashi watched with fascination as Hanare greeted them in return, using a very sweet voice, then accidentally dropped her purse.

Well, it looked an accident, but Kakashi knew how agile and coordinated she was firsthand. Both engineers dove to pick up her purse for her, but Vega beat them to it. He swept in gracefully, retrieved the item and offered it to her in one fluid motion. Hanare thanked him, tilting her face up appealingly and smiling, laughing about how clumsy she could be sometimes. As soon as the words were out of her mouth, all the contents of the purse accidentally spilled out onto the sidewalk.

Kakashi narrowed his eyes. Hanare was now blushing furiously and held up her hand to keep Vega from helping. Then she knelt down in front of him to gather her things. Vega ran a hand over his ponytail and didn't seem to know where to look. He seemed to want to look down at Hanare, but it seemed he couldn't for more than a second at a time. Hanare was chattering away and putting her items in her purse slowly all while her head was right at crotch level. Every so often she'd look up at Vega and smile, and the assassin would respond, swallow hard, look away and adjust some part of his hair or shirt or jacket.

Kakashi frowned beneath his mask. He'd seen Hanare's deft fingers loosen the latch on her purse. She'd let it spill on purpose. But why? What was she doing?

Finally everything was picked up and Vega held out his hand to help her rise. Kakashi clenched his jaw as their fingers touched. Then, to his shock, Hanare wrapped her arm around Vega's in a… _girlfriendly_ way, and Vega started to lead her off after giving some last comments to the engineers. The engineers put on their hard hats and walked away briskly, clipboards in hand. Hanare was headed down a small side street, still on Vega's arm.

And Kakashi was experiencing a brand new emotion. Or perhaps an old emotion in a brand new context.

Never prone to personal jealousy, having had no relationships to speak of to be jealous over, Kakashi had experienced jealousy as a student when his sensei praised his teammates or when he didn't get the best scores. He appeared nonchalant, but was highly competitive even at a young age and even with childhood friends. Kakashi's desire to be the best drove him to excel and to train hard, but he still thought himself better than others - the talentless - like Guy. Kakashi was willing to work for recognition, but deep down he felt he _deserved_ that recognition and that the world should give it to him - if the world knew what was good for it.

As he got older, Kakashi's competitiveness and ambition increased until he hit rock bottom as a youth: losing Obito and Rin, his best friends and teammates, in part due to his own hubris, gave Kakashi a jaded edge. No longer so much competitive and ambitious, he simply became cold and withdrawn.

Over the years his edge mellowed, but he still liked being recognized. He took more of a resigned martyr approach, but he still enjoyed being the best. He still liked beating Guy at everything. Team 7 had softened him (as kids usually do) but at his core Kakashi still felt he was damn good enough to be respected and given credit when it was due. He would never be OK with coming in second to losers and dregs; he would never not fight for something when a fight was brought to him.

Kakashi flitted from branch to flagpole to billboard to wire to building to double-decker bus to streetlight to branch… tracking Hanare's progress through downtown. She still had her arm through Vega's, and was keeping up a light, smiling banter with the assassin. Vega seemed at ease, gesturing at sights and telling her stories about them. Kakashi finally realized he was clenching his jaw and forced himself to take some deep breaths, though the frown line between the copy nin's brows remained.

"And this is the memorial to the artisan who first brought cheesemaking to the city in its fledgling days," Vega was saying. "Do you like cheese, Rei?"

 _She's out with you, isn't she?_ Kakashi eavesdropped from an alcove high up on First National Bank.

Rei glanced at a large stone wedge she'd walked past many times. "Yes, very much. Especially soft cheeses. Do you always research the historical sights of the cities you visit?" she asked.

"Of course," Vega said. "A city is nothing more than a place on a map, without its history."

Rei just smiled. The morning had not been at all unpleasant so far. _Men for you. Put blowjobs on their mind and suddenly they're all romantics._

They went into a small but high-end looking cafe.

"Triple espresso and a scone for me. A nonfat chai latte and macha macaron for the lady."

"Yes mister Vega. Charge it to your account?"

"Thank you." Vega nodded and the girl showed them to a lovely table set with flowers, larger than the others and a bit secluded in the front corner of the cafe near the window.

Rei sat when Vega pulled out the chair for her. "How did you know what I like?" she asked in amazement as he sat down across from her.

"I asked Yuki," Vega laughed, waving away Rei's incredulous look. He leaned forward. "I hope it was alright I took the liberty of ordering for you. I just want you to feel taken care of, Rei."

Rei smiled warmly and was about to answer when a busser sweeping nearby knocked a saucer off the table and it shattered noisily on the floor.

Rei jumped, glancing over at the young man. "Sorry about that miss." The boy's dark hair hid his eyes.

"It's fine, no trouble at all." Rei smiled at him, but the young man didn't look up. He seemed engrossed in cleaning up the saucer spill.

The cashier rushed over with a box of chocolates. "So sorry about that mister Vega. He's new. Apologies, ma'am. Please enjoy these." The girl bowed. Vega nodded with an annoyed quirk of his eyebrow for the busser, but then he turned to Rei with a grin.

"What would you like to do next?" he asked smoothly, putting a piece of scone in his mouth. It wasn't very suggestive, but something in the way he phrased it made Rei's lower back tingle.

"There's a jewelry shop I've always want-"

"Lulu l'Etoile?"

"Why yes, how did you know?"

"The style suits you. Something to match those sapphire earrings you're wearing, perhaps."

Rei blushed and reached up to touch her earrings self-consciously. Vega smiled to himself. _Women. Talk about jewelry and they get wetter than a Roman fountain._ Rei was stirring her coffee, her lips pursed in a cute way. The busser seemed to be hovering nearby, cleaning the same spot for eons.

"Aren't you finished there yet?!" Vega's head whipped around toward the busser like a striking viper. Rei startled, dropping the last bite of her macaron.

"Just. Finishing. Up. Sir." The busser nodded, nonplussed, and disappeared into the kitchen through a utility door.

Rei finished her breakfast with a frown, annoyed at Vega for startling her. He noticed her face and tried to put on a contrite expression which didn't suit his cruel, angular features at all.

"My apologies, Rei," he said sincerely. The littlest thing could ruin the long-term plan for a day, he knew from experience. Rei was an uptight sort. He had to be careful not to annoy her. "After my mother died and I ran away, I worked for a few years in restaurants to support myself. I wasn't even thirteen yet. I have little tolerance for incompetent help."

"I see," said Rei. She was softened. That was all he needed. Vega smiled his playboy smile. "But enough about my issues. Let's get about adorning that perfect neck of yours."

Rei blushed and took his offered hand. They left the cafe, not noticing the young busser running up to the cashier, looking harried.

"Michiko, I'm so sorry! Don't know what happened-I went in the storage room to get paper towels for the bathroom and the door shut and locked on me! What did I miss? Please don't fire me, I wasn't asleep I swear!"

The cashier rolled her eyes. "Tomas, enough with the jokes! You've been out here the whole time sweeping slow as molasses and annoying mister Vega. Now go wash the dishes! Haiyaku!"

Tomas jumped to do as Michi told him - there was no telling what she was capable of when she had _that_ face… but as he rolled up his sleeves at the dish pit, he took a moment to scratch his head and rethink his morning. No, he was sure he'd been locked in the storage closet and not in the dining room sweeping… hadn't he?

Tomas ran out of time to ponder when Michi yelled she didn't hear any dishwashing going on. He shrugged and turned on the water.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

 **Present, Sunday 4 p.m.**

Kakashi sat on the railing of their room's balcony, just staring out over the city. He hadn't been back long. Guy and Asuma had left a note: they were going out to try the casino; they'd be back around dinnertime. Kakashi was alone with his thoughts for a little while longer at least, but he wasn't sure that was a good thing.

He'd stopped tailing Hanare only when she and Vega had returned to Paradise late in the afternoon. Vega had gone into what he'd promised would be a long business meeting, scheduled to run right up until the club opened, and Hana had met up with some other dancers and gone to the dressing area to gossip and refresh themselves before work.

With nowhere else to go, and needing time to think, Kakashi returned to the hotel and had been watching birds from the balcony for over an hour.

The copy ninja was confounded. He'd set out in the morning confident he was looking out for an old friend, and comfortable in his role protecting her. But as the day progressed he'd become more and more confused, until he felt like he was slowly losing a chess game he didn't even remember starting to play.

Hanare didn't seem to need protecting - she seemed to be out for a day of fun with her _boyfriend._ Kakashi felt himself tense up at the mere thought of the word. But there was no mistaking it… she'd taken Vega's arm, held his hand, eaten with him, laughed at his jokes, let him buy things for her… _even_ kissed… his… cheek…

Kakashi flung a handful of kunai and they peppered the side of the nearest building, embedding themselves deep in the stone with hard _thwok, thwok, thwoks!_

The breeze ruffled Kakashi's silver white hair, reminding him of Konoha… and the day Hanare came to the village. It had been a windy day. Leaves had blown around her. Her hair stirred in the wind. She smelled like tropical fruit that day. Different than today.

 _Well, she probably has a hundred perfumes, to go with each disguise-_ Kakashi reasoned, and something about that made him sad.

"All this time… I've risked my life… for a homeland I've never even seen," she'd said.

 _Have you found a home now?_ Kakashi felt a flare of anger he couldn't trace. None of it made sense.

The ventilation shaft in that damn jewelry store had been extremely uncomfortable. He'd had to take off his vest and shirt and shimmy in on his belly to get close enough. And then there was nothing to really see or hear… except the intricacies of _jewelry shopping._

"Try this one, dear." The proprietor held up a necklace of blue stones that Kakashi thought looked like a bib. Hana put it on and Vega fastened it for her, unnecessarily caressing the nape of her neck as he did so. Kakashi watched the light blush form on Hanare's cheeks and had to resist the urge to burst from the air vent right then and personally break each one of Vega's fingers. _I've no right,_ he chastised himself. _It's none of my business._

Hanare was smiling at her reflection. Kakashi thought the necklace looked nice. The proprietor was holding up a mirror, nodding and beaming.

"I don't think so," said Vega. Hanare looked up at the assassin. "Something simpler, perhaps." He brushed a strand of Hanare's hair away from her neck with his long fingers. "With a beauty such as this, one should only enhance it. Never compete with it."

The proprietor nodded vigorously and went to put away the bib and take out several more necklaces. Kakashi frowned. That was a ridiculous sentiment. There was no piece of jewelry on earth that could ever _compete_ with Hana-chan, even if it was a diamond the size of Choji it'd still be nothing next to-

 _Wait… what was I just thinking?!_

"Let's try… this." Vega picked up something off one of the velvet trays. He brought it around to Hanare's waiting neck, slowly encircling her bare skin with it. When he finished with the clasp and stepped back, Hanare gasped. The proprietor looked emotional. Kakashi uncovered his Sharingan to get a better look.

"A flawless piece to enhance a flawless beauty." The proprietor smiled kindly at Hanare and nodded at Vega. "The gentleman has impeccable taste. And the lady is the epitome of elegance."

Kakashi squinted at the necklace from the air vent. A natural sapphire, high clarity and brilliance, several carats, teardrop cut. Italian chain, in platinum. Kakashi didn't get it. It looked kind of plain to him, and he thought Hana looked better without any jewelry anyway. If she was going to get something, why not get the one _she_ liked?

"How much?" Vega asked casually, admiring the necklace on Hanare as though she was something in a museum.

The proprietor said a figure. Vega handed over his credit card without taking his eyes off Hanare. Kakashi pulled his forehead protector back down over his left eye. The price of the necklace was half a year's salary for a ninja. He paused for a moment, watching Hanare smile up at Vega and touch the gem at her neck. It sparkled under the shop lights. Hana seemed to _feel_ pretty with it on. Maybe that was the point. Kakashi squirmed backwards through the vent. _Half a year's salary…_

"Kakashi! You've come back to us!" Guy bellowed as he flung open the sliding door to the balcony. "DON'T JUMP," Guy added, noticing Kakashi's precarious seat on the railing. The jumpsuit-clad ninja skidded to a stop, holding up both hands.

"Whatever it is, Kakashi, we can fix it. Together." Guy's upraised hands trembled and his eyes watered.

"Guy, I'm just thinking-" Kakashi explained, but before he could finish Guy had grabbed him in a huge bear hug and pulled him away from his peaceful vantage point.

Kakashi sighed. There wasn't much more to think about anyway. Hanare had worn the necklace for the rest of the excursion. She and Vega had gone into a lingerie shop, but Kakashi had called in a fake bomb threat so they had to leave. They'd stopped for lunch and eaten croissant sandwiches. Lastly Hanare had picked out a bouquet at a florist stand and then they'd headed back to Paradise via horse-drawn carriage because Vega had noted her feet must be "tired from looking so sexy."

The smell of Guy's hair pomade was actually a welcome change from the morning's recon mission. And that was saying a lot.

"Guy. I'm fine. You can let go." Kakashi smiled under his mask as Guy hesitantly released him. "Thanks," Kakashi said, patting Guy's shoulder. The jumpsuit-clad shinobi still looked a bit worried, but just nodded.

Asuma appeared in the doorway. "We should start packing up," he said around his cigarette. "Gotta make room in the luggage for these babies." He held up several stacks of cash in each hand as a wide grin split his face.

"You- you guys won?" Kakashi said incredulously, momentarily forgetting about his troubles with a certain green-haired lady.

Asuma chuckled. "Turns out I'm not too bad at poker. And turns out the Green Beast of Konoha has a green thumb when it comes to slots."

"A youthful touch cannot be denied," said Guy smugly, holding up the lucky thumb and winking.

"How much is that?" Kakashi asked.

"10k or so," Asuma said.

 _Almost half a year's salary…_ Kakashi leaned against the rail and gave his friends an enthusiastic nod. "Well done."

"We should head out early," Asuma said, snuffing his cigarette butt. "C'mon. Let's pack then go drink."

"A last trip through the buffet!" Guy suggested.

"I can't." Kakashi's eye was on Asuma's watch.

"Huh?" Guy and Asuma said at the same time.

"I can't go."

Guy looked at Asuma, who shrugged. Kakashi was staring out at the city again.

"Can't go where, Kakashi?" Guy said.

"Pack. Home. The buffet. Anywhere. I have to get back to Paradise."

"What are you talking about? The strip club?" Asuma frowned.

"Yeah. They open at five." Kakashi looked restless, so Guy proactively grabbed his arm to keep him on the balcony.

"You liked it that much, eh?" Asuma chuckled. "Gotta be first in line on a Sunday night… ok, well let's go right after we-"

"No. I need to leave NOW." Before Guy and Asuma realized what was happening, Kakashi had slipped Guy's hold and leapt off the balcony.

"Holy-" Asuma started.

"Kakashi!" Guy yelled, fretfully watching until he saw his silver-haired friend land lower down on a building's chimney.

"He made it right?" Asuma said, massaging his forehead.

"Yep. Headed due east." Guy said grimly.

"Is it just me or is he acting stranger than usual." Asuma lit another cigarette.

"The city may be overloading him with youthful impulses," Guy said worriedly. Asuma rolled his eyes and stuffed their winnings into secret pouches under his clothes.

"I guess we go after him, then," Asuma puffed with a sigh.

Guy looked down at his clothes. "I should change. I might see Yuki, and this isn't my best color-"

"Guy!" Asuma reprimanded. The Sarutobi was already flinging a cable from the balcony.

"You're right. If I have any chance with her, she'll have to love _all_ my jumpsuits," Guy followed Asuma, grabbing hold of the line. "Even the pikachu one…"

…

Kakashi was posted on an awning on a building adjacent to the Pink Paradise, deciding on how to best infiltrate the club and locate Hanare, when Guy and Asuma caught up with him. Asuma's watch read 4:57 p.m.

"Alright Kash, tell us what's up," Asuma growled, placing a restraining hand on the copy nin's shoulder.

"We want to help!" Guy pleaded, looking over Kakashi's shoulder and staring the same direction. "What are we looking at?"

"I don't have time to explain," Kakashi said in a dangerous tone. "If you insist on coming then fine, we'll go together. Like last time. But no questions. Don't use my real name. And NO surprises."

Asuma bristled but his curiosity outweighed his irritation and he nodded his assent. Guy patted Kakashi reassuringly. The three dropped down from the awning to behind a bush. To Guy and Asuma's surprise, Kakashi went into some hand signs…

 _Poof!_ Kakashi was gone and in his place stood a young man with wavy, floppy brown hair that nearly covered his hazel eyes. He was wearing a baggy, shapeless sweater and a plain scarf.

"Ohhh… kay…" Asuma grunted.

"Remember. No questions," the young man said. His voice was slightly higher than Kakashi's.

"Got it, Kaka- I, I mean, uh-" Guy stammered.

"We'll think of something," Asuma grumbled as the young man was already leaving them behind, headed for the entrance.

Dante and the bouncer were working the front door again.

"Oh!" Dante smiled, mostly at Asuma. "We're so glad the blackout last night didn't turn you off. It's wonderful you're back."

"No actor tonight?" The bouncer sounded disappointed, peering around them as if hoping the masked man was hiding in the hall.

"Had to go over scripts," Asuma ad-libbed. "We brought a producer instead. Told him how awesome this place was."

Dante looked worried. "VIP is full tonight, I'm afraid, some friends of the owner's are in from out of town and-"

"I hate VIP anyway," the young producer said. "You don't need to treat us any differently than other guests. Thank you for the thought, though."

Dante closed his mouth. The bouncer nodded. "Nice to see you guys ain't those regular Hollywood types!"

"Definitely not," Asuma chuckled.

"At least let me give you these," Dante made a little bow and handed them several free drink tickets.

"You're the best," Asuma hugged both Dante and the bouncer, patting them on the back and giving air kisses. They both blushed.

"C'mon… sir… let's make this a night to remember!" Guy gestured at the "producer" and led the way through the curtain.

Kakashi felt less anxious than the first time, so he could take in more of his surroundings. Plus, it appeared the club was a lot less crowded on Sundays, making it easier to move and think.

He remembered the vaulted ceiling, but he'd been too nervous to notice the large, square bar on the main level. Everything was nice dark wood, and it looked like you could walk up and order on every side. A quick glance around the rest of the room told him the floor was organized in tiers, with the stage at the lowest point and the VIP section where they'd previously sat right next to it. Above them seemed to be some large rooms with glass windows overlooking the main level. Private rooms, he figured. Maybe large-party rooms. He could see Vega's silhouette through one slightly tinted window, along with the shadows of some other men. _The "business" meeting._

Guy was waltzing in trying to look nonchalant and failing miserably. He was obviously anxious to see a certain someone. Every time a hostess would get near he'd show a glimmer of excitement, then wilt when it wasn't the well-endowed Yuki. Kakashi stepped close to Asuma.

"Did you bring the money?"

"'Course," Asuma said, "Didn't wanna leave it in the hotel room… wait, why?!" He puffed suspiciously as Kakashi just looked around, not replying.

"You never know," Kakashi finally said. Asuma didn't like the sound of it at all.

"There's a table with a good view open right there," Guy said, jerking his thumb at some seats near the second-tier railing.

Kakashi nodded. They made their way over. Kakashi took the seat facing the rest of the room and with a view of the bar. He also had a good bead on the VIP section so he could check out the so-called "out of towner friends" of the owner…

Suddenly Guy sat bolt upright and both Kakashi and Asuma turned to see Yuki heading toward their table, a smile of recognition on her face.

"Great I'm parched," Asuma mumbled. Kakashi leaned back in his chair and folded his hands in his lap. Guy had put on his most blinding smile, which was almost as many volts as the yellow color of his pikachu suit.

"You came back!" Yuki squealed, putting cocktail menus in front of them. She seemed genuinely pleased. "But… no actor tonight?"

"Mr. Popular," Asuma sighed, looking at the whiskey list.

"He had to go over his script," Kakashi said, repeating Asuma's story from earlier.

"Oh, of course!" Yuki said. "It's so nice of you to bring a new friend for us to meet. Who is this, master?" she asked the question of Guy. Guy couldn't get his jaw working in time, so Asuma stepped in.

"This is one of our producers… Kenta-san."

"So very nice to meet you, master Kenta!" Yuki bobbed a bow. Then, shyly, "You know, masters," she took on a confidential tone, "the reason I inquired about your actor friend was for my friend Rei!"

Kakashi blinked, a haze of confusion falling over him as he forgot the situation for a moment. _Did Hanare see me? Did she ask Yuki about-_

"You see, Rei doesn't meet many nice men here, and the actor seemed just her type!" Yuki giggled and Kakashi felt something in him settle in disappointment.

"How long have you known… Rei?" Kakashi asked.

"Since she started a few months ago," Yuki said. "You all don't seem like the kind we usually meet in this business, but don't tell her I talked about setting her up, okay?" Yuki winked.

"Macallan 30, one cube," Asuma grunted, tired of the gossip and ready to drink.

"Of course, master! So sorry for talking so much!" Yuki bowed.

"You can talk as much as you like! The sound is as refreshing as the first morning of springtime, pure youthful delight!" Guy said loudly, finally finding his voice and glaring at Asuma. "And I want a Kamikaze Bowl!" He patted Yuki's lace-gloved hand on the table in an extraordinarily chaste way.

"Bourbon…" Kakashi said softly, "...Yuki, if you don't mind… what is Rei's type?"

The girl kept smiling, but Kakashi didn't miss the slight change in her eyes from ditzy to calculating. He met her gaze, keeping his expression calm and open. The appraisal only lasted a couple seconds but Kakashi felt its intensity. Yuki might make a great interrogator in the intel division…

"She likes guys who are good at things. Talented or accomplished. It's not really about money with her. Funny, but not clowns, more like… the smart, sarcastic type. Quirky guys. Tall. Quirky like, different. Never the easy ones. Nope. Rei's always out for a challenge, it gets her in trouble. But she needs a nice guy! … Challenges aren't always a good thing…"

The last part had slipped out, and Kakashi noticed the sad change in tone.

"Which one's Rei?" Asuma asked.

Now it was Kakashi's turn to glare. "She took you on stage-" he caught himself, "the one you _said_ took you on stage last time. Wasn't that her name, manager-san?" He kicked Guy under the table.

"Ow- oh! Oh, ohhh yes is what I mean," Guy overacted, but he got the drift. "Rei was her name. Green hair. Yellow ruffles. Shamisen."

"Is Rei here tonight, Yuki?" Kakashi asked. Now Yuki's expression turned to a knowing smirk. "Ah, so naughty master has _heard_ about Lady Rei from his kind friends!" Yuki giggled again. She gave him a speculative look as she picked up the menus and laid down cocktail napkins, her gigantic breasts inches from Guy's face.

"She's here," Yuki finally said. "In fact, I think she just went up to the bar to get a drink before she starts work." Yuki winked at "Kenta." Guy had a puddle of drool on his side of the table. Asuma sighed loudly.

Yuki bowed quickly and was gone.

As she left their table, Kakashi's gaze flicked over to the bar.

There, standing with her back toward their table, was Hanare. She was still wearing the same red dress. Her green hair glowed under the soft lights in slight waves. She was smiling, chatting with some other girls _. It's her._ Kakashi felt his chest tighten beneath the shapeless sweater of his disguise. She was only fifty feet away, not with Vega… now was his chance.

 _Chance for what_? Kakashi had spent the entire day thinking and still didn't have a plan. _I need to warn her that her boyfriend is a dangerous assassin and cold-blooded killer._

Kakashi realized how ridiculous that would sound coming from him. _I let her go. She told me she… She told me how she felt, and I let her go. I stood there while she jumped off that cliff and out of my life. So her man's a killer, so what. So am I._

"Kakashi?" Guy had noticed him staring and followed his gaze. "Oh!" the Green Beast exclaimed. He nudged Asuma and tilted his head toward the bar.

Asuma narrowed his eyes and took a good long look and a few long puffs. "Is that was this is all about?" he whispered finally, eyes sliding over to Kakashi. Kakashi didn't mean to, but he nodded, once, slowly.

Just then Yuki came back with their drinks. "Fine scotch for first master. Kamikaze Bowl for my little pikachu…" she tweaked Guy's cheek as she set down his drink. The taijutsu master was looking at her in rapture.

"Gotta… catch 'em… all?" he asked hopefully. Yuki burst into more giggles, turning a pink to match her uniform.

She composed herself long enough to give "Kenta" his bourbon. "Bourbon for master Kenta… and fyi… Rei only has forty-five minutes before she needs to go change for her performance." With a last wink the little hostess left them.

Asuma was watching Kakashi. Guy slurped noisily from his fruity-looking fishbowl sized cocktail. "Kenta" took a glacial sip of his whiskey, eyes on Rei. She was laughing at a joke the bartender told.

"Now what?" Asuma said.

"Kakashi?" Guy prodded.

Kakashi was well-trained enough to recognize pivotal moments on the battlefield. A civilian might call it "intuition" but shinobi knew it was something more. An enhanced awareness, a comprehensive grasp of the situation… a clarity that could save your life and the lives of your friends, if you trusted it, followed its leylines, acted on it in time…

"Give me the money," Kakashi ordered, putting his hand on the table in Asuma's direction.

"What?" Asuma looked taken aback. "Look, Kash, if you wanna meet her let's just buy a dance from her later, after her show. That's the way it's done. Don't go being the weird guy at the club who-"

"Give. Me. The. Money." Kakashi's voice was a low growl. He didn't have a perfect plan, but if he hesitated any longer it would only get worse.

"Guy?" Asuma wasn't going to hand over their winnings without a second opinion. In fact, Sharingan Kakashi was beginning to piss him off.

Guy looked at both his friends. He rubbed his chin. He closed his eyes a moment. Then he opened them in a burst of excitement.

"FATE will decide!" he said, slapping both other men on the back with enough force to cause injury. Kakashi coughed and Asuma's cigarette popped from his mouth and flew across the table. "Rock. Paper. Scisssssorssss!" Guy grabbed his friends' wrists. Asuma groaned. Kakashi sweat under his scarf. He didn't want to risk his resources for the Hanare battle this way but he didn't have a better plan and…

"JON, KEN, PO…!" Guy screeched.


	7. Chapter 7

"Damn it!" Asuma swore, slamming his fist on the table.

"Don't worry. He'll pay us back. I'm sure of it or my name isn't Might Guy. My rival is a mysterious one, but he is honorable…"

"Shut up," Asuma groaned. "Ah well. At least he settled for only taking half."

"All's fair in love and war," Guy sniffled. "Look at him, riding into battle with only our cash to arm himself."

"$5K is pretty deece armor if you ask me," Asuma grunted uncharitably. Kakashi was gonna be buying him smokes for the rest of his _life_ because of this.

…

"Bartender," Kakashi inserted himself at one corner of the large square island that was Pink Paradise's main bar. He could see Hanare just twenty feet from him, near the next corner… A well-built young man with dark hair looked up and nodded at Kakashi, coming to stand in front of him.

"Welcome, stranger," the bartender smiled. He lay a cocktail napkin in front of Kakashi and noted the half-consumed bourbon in his hand. "Let me refresh that for you." The bartender's black vest and spotless white shirt stretched across his lean muscles as he bent slightly to grab some items.

Shinobi-quick the young man had a chilled glass on the rail and a block of solid ice in one hand. Kakashi watched in amazement as the bartender whittled the ice into a perfect sphere in a matter of seconds and eased it carefully into the glass. He reached back without looking and took a crystal bottle off the shelf. Kakashi read the label. _Hibiki._

The spirit was a golden honey color that flowed smoothly over the ice sphere. He put the drink to his lips. Hanare's friends had left and now she was being approached by a much older man. The bartender nodded at Kakashi. "I know you had bourbon, but I think you might also enjoy this. Please, it's on the house." Kakashi nodded gratefully. Maybe the word that they were VIPs had gotten around the staff. He felt a distant, negligible whisper of guilt. Such was the life of a shinobi. Deception at every turn.

"It's delicious," Kakashi said truthfully. The bartender inclined his head graciously. Kakashi took another sip, and cleared his throat. "Excuse me… I'd like to…" The bartender looked at Kakashi expectantly as he polished a glass. Kakashi took a deep breath.

 _This is it._

"I'd like to send that woman a drink."

 _There. I said it._ Kakashi felt sweat roll down the back of his neck. He felt worse and at more of a disadvantage than when he was fighting Zabuza, the Demon of the Mist, in the mist.

"Of course," the bartender smiled warmly. Kakashi felt slightly better at the encouraging reaction. The bartender was still looking at him.

"I.. um… could you help me with that?" _Unfamiliar ground_ Kakashi berated himself, knowing he looked foolish. "Do you know what she likes?" he asked the bartender in desperation. The old man was regaling Hanare with some story. Kakashi noted the diamond rings on his hand.

"I do." The bartender pulled some bottles off the shelf and placed them in front of Kakashi. He stared at them as Hanare's laugh drifted across the ambient noise to him. Had he ever heard her laugh that day? At least, if this all goes badly… I know now what her laugh sounds like…

"This is her favorite tequila," the bartender put his hand on a bottle that read _Partida Anejo._ "This is her favorite scotch whisky." _Yamazaki 12._ "Her favorite gin." _Hendricks. "_ Her favorite…" The bartender offered to let Kakashi taste them all, which he did, albeit a bit hurriedly.

Kakashi noticed Hanare checking the clock, and wished he had a sharingan for his palate. _What kind of drink did the hero send in Icha Icha?_ He thought hard and remembered it as something strong. Not juicy, like Guy's. More like what Asuma had. The thought of Asuma made Kakashi irritated for no reason.

"This." Kakashi pointed at a bottle. "One cube?" The copy ninja didn't mean for it to come out as a question. Luckily the bartender didn't notice or was too well schooled to show his thoughts outwardly. The young man only nodded with a smile.

"Right away, sir." The bartender prepared the drink gracefully, then hurried - without really looking like he was hurrying - over to Hanare down at her corner of the bar.

 _He'd make a great ninja_ Kakashi found himself thinking as time slowed down and he watched the bartender slide the drink across the bar. Hanare looked up, surprised, at the bartender. He leaned in to say something quietly to her. She listened, ignoring the old man still talking at her. She blinked. A slight smile crossed her face. The bartender moved away, job done. And then Hanare took the drink in her slender fingers, straightened and turned…

...Right towards him. Her gaze traveled up his disguise until her brown eyes met his. Kakashi's… _No, Kenta's_ he reminded himself. Hanare's lips parted slightly. _Will she recognize me?_ No. He knew this genjutsu was too thorough for that; it took extreme control and a substantial amount of chakra. The scroll from Kurenai helped, but he still wondered how he'd be faring in a few hours.

 _Well, at worst I end up in the ICU again._ He had prepared this genjutsu for an upcoming top secret mission to Water… well, maybe the Hokage would just have to take him off that job. It was partly her fault he was in this mess anyway. _And this… is an important mission, too..._

Hanare smiled. Kakashi found himself once again stunned by her beauty. It wasn't just her physical features, but a radiance and energy she had. An aura of serenity, passion, and curiosity she had all at once… Her eyes were alight now, wondering who he was, laughing inwardly at some thought - hopefully at the old windbag's expense and not his!-

Kakashi ran a hand through the floppy brown hair on his head and wished momentarily he'd created a less conservative genjutsu for his persona. But what was the point of that? Would he really be better off as Kakashi, instead of Kenta? Kakashi had let Hanare go. Kakashi, the famous copy ninja of the great Hidden Leaf Village. Sharingan Kakashi, son of the White Fang, with his flashy hair and smutty books. The man who copied a thousand jutsus but had nothing to say at the top of a cliff.

 _Maybe I just ruined my chances_ he thought, a calm cold settling over him as Hanare just stared, staying at her end of the bar. _No, I never had a shot to begin with_ he amended. The old man was yelling about yachts. Hanare had a little frown line between her brows.

Kakashi reached for his own drink, turning away from her. _I'll just finish this and go back… to Guy and Asuma…_ The sting of defeat was unlike anything Kakashi had felt before. It was like senbon needles, stopping his heart…

"Excuse me," a voice splashed over him. Bracing. Like ice water. He was terrified.

But he was alive.

Kakashi slowly rotated toward the voice.

"Excuse me," Hanare repeated, looking up at him. "Did you buy this for me?" She was quizzical, neither smiling nor frowning. He stared down at her green hair, her soft, curved lips. The beauty mark under her right eye.

 _Stay on mission._ "Yes," was all he could muster. He was glad Kenta's voice didn't break.

Now Hanare smiled. "Thank you," she said. "I've never had tequila with just one ice cube in it."

Kakashi's mind reeled. Was that weird? Had he chosen something really, really terrible? Adrenaline hammered through his veins and his mind grasped around for something-

"I heard you like things a little different," was what came out of his mouth, and it came out in a cool monotone that Kakashi was comfortable with.

Hanare looked surprised. Then her eyes narrowed and her mouth twisted in a cute show of outrage. "Yuki!" she hissed under her breath. Kakashi looked away. Hanare reached up and turned his face back towards her. Her fingers were soft and warm.

"Did a really buxom hostess serve your table by any chance?" she asked.

"I think so," Kakashi demurred. Hanare glared. "Aren't there a lot of… women like that here?" he said weakly. Was Hanare always this forward with strangers? _She works in a strip club. She has to be 'forward'..._ The nudity was to be expected, but this aggression… Kakashi felt like it was nearly more intimate than the dancing.

"Stop protecting her! She's always butting into my personal life, trying to set me up." Hanare had turned away from him so she could lean on the bar with both elbows and sulk.

Kakashi stayed where he was, except to lean a bit on the bar himself. He picked up his drink with his far hand. "Well," he said. "Do you need help with your personal life?"

Hanare blinked, then turned slowly to check out the guy she was standing next to. _Either that was the absolute worst come-on I've ever heard, or…_ He didn't look like he was being lewd. His face was serious, calm. She studied it. Brown hair flopped down over his forehead, a little curl to it, nearly covering his eyes that appeared to be brown or hazel and had a slight downward slant to them. His hair was unstyled but clean. His face was oval and the nose mostly straight, maybe just a tad long. He had a smaller mouth with nicely shaped lips a little on the thin side. There was a slight dimple in his chin.

Since he was wearing a baggy sweater _and_ a scarf - definitely strange club attire - Rei couldn't tell what kind of body he had but he _was_ tall. His hands were good sized. His legs looked solid. _Odd sense of style, but interesting. Not bad overall. Maybe he's in tech?_

"So what do you do," Rei started off with the most basic question. The young man looked confused.

"I… make movies," he said awkwardly. Rei raised a brow. _Is this that guy Yuki was going on about?_

"Are you an actor?"

"...producer."

 _Oh, so it's not him._ Rei felt slightly disappointed. She did like to satisfy her curiosity. "Did you come alone?" _Not one for much conversation, is he?_ Rei realized she might have to pull every bit of information out of him herself.

"No. With them." The guy gestured over his shoulder with a nod of his head. Rei peeked around him and saw a man in a pikachu jumpsuit waving at her, and-

"Oh! I remember those two," she said. "They were here last night. The manager and the other I brought on… stage…" Rei trailed off as she felt herself blushing. Which was completely absurd. The young man was looking gently down at her. Rei took a drink. _He knows I'm a stripper - we're at my work for pete's sake. And it never bothers me to talk openly about what I do, anyway!_ She irritably set her glass down on the bar.

"They enjoyed the performance," the young man said. "They mentioned… ruffles?"

Now Rei felt her face going from pink to red. _This is ridiculous._ She peeked up through her lashes at the guy. He wasn't smirking or grinning; he didn't have any expression she'd expect from someone flirting with her, yet she felt like she was being teased. He was watching her carefully, his eyelids partially lowered in a calm, almost sleepy-looking stare.

Rei had to look away. She felt a little warm under her dress and wanted to move the conversation away from the topic of her butt. Er, _ruffles_.

She was used to guys being off balance around _her_ , not the other way around!

Rei put her hand on her hip and turned a fully powered smile up at the young man, tossing her hair and arching her back a little. To his credit the guy kept his eyes on her face.

"What's your name?" she grinned.

"...Kenta."

"Hmm, _Kenta._ Healthy, strong… isn't that what it means?" The young man looked blank. Rei put a finger to her lips.

"And… _big… thick…_ I'm sure that's correct! So, is it true?" Rei leaned close to his chest and fluttered her eyelashes.

Kakashi felt like he was walking over a snake pit.

"Jasmine?" he said without thinking. Rei frowned and stepped back.

"What?!" she snapped. Here she was giving this laconic nerdmuffin a shot and he says some other girl's name-

"Y- your hair. It smells like jasmine. I spent some time in the Crescent Moon kingdom. It was common there."

Rei closed her mouth. _If that wasn't the most non sequitur…_ This guy - Kenta - was completely baffling.

"Oh…" she said. "You must travel a lot, for work?"

"You could say that," Kenta said with the tiniest upturn of the corner of his lips.

"Do you enjoy that?" Rei sipped her drink.

"I suppose. I never really thought about it."

 _Boy what a clam._ Rei soldiered on. It was better than him being a chatterbug, she supposed… and she definitely didn't want to go back to being talked at by Ancient Mr. Yacht over there.

"What's your favorite place you've ever visited?" Rei tried putting on her most non-threatening pretty face. _Maybe he's just shy._

Kenta thought for a moment. "The Land of Waves."

Rei was surprised. "That's a very small nation. I've heard of their economic troubles."

Kenta nodded. "When we arrived there were a lot of bad things happening due to the influence of a foreign syndicate. By the time we left, the locals had organized, destroyed the gang's chokehold, and it seemed better times were ahead for them."

Rei smiled her real smile. It was easy to listen to Kenta once he got to talking about something he cared about. He noticed her looking and smiled back. Suddenly Rei's eyes opened wide and she twisted around to look at… the clock over the bar.

"Oh no! I've got to go change," she said. _How did the time go so quickly?_

"Your show?" Kenta asked. He looked ill at ease again. He set down his half-finished whiskey with the beautiful, partially melted ice sphere. "You didn't tell me yours," he said. Rei was hurrying to finish her drink.

"My what?" she said, slurping tequila.

"Your favorite place you've visited." Kenta gave her a soft look. Rei felt herself blushing for no reason again.

"It's not important," she said. Kenta might have raised an eyebrow under those floppy bangs. She couldn't be sure.

"Well, if it's that embarrassing-must be something really good… let's see, could it be-"

"A small village. In the Land of Fire," she blurted. Kenta's face changed from almost teasing to serious again. "I'm sorry, I've really got to go. You- you can stay, you shouldn't waste that-" she motioned at his drink.

"I don't want to miss your performance," he said.

"Oh, you'll be able to see it all… that table has a nice view…" Rei squirmed, feeling self-conscious talking about work again. She shoved her empty glass lightly across the bar. "I hope you enjoy the show." She forced herself to laugh lightly. "Lots of leather tonight!" Kenta didn't look the least bit excited.

 _Ah well, maybe that's not his thing._ She bit her lip, unable to puzzle out why she felt so damn flustered.

"Thank you for talking with me, Rei," Kenta said. Rei nodded and picked up her purse.

"Sorry to leave so… I've really gotta get down there," she finished lamely, turning away from him.

"It's alright," Kenta said softly. "Go."

Rei paused mid-step and nearly stumbled, but Kenta's hand was already around her upper arm to keep her upright. _Go._ How did he move that fast? One second he was next to the bar, and then… _Go._

Rei put her fingers to her head. "Have- have we met before, Kenta?" she said without looking at him.

He let go of her arm. "Not in these lives."

Rei sighed. _No, of course not. And that was kind of a creepy thing to say._ She turned and gave him a formulaic wave and cute smile. "Thanks for the tequila. It was really good with one cube." He didn't say anything, just looked at a loss.

 _This seems so familiar._ They looked at each other a second more, before Rei shrugged and disappeared into the milling crowd that was starting to accumulate before the show started.

Kakashi went to retrieve his drink from the bar. He laid out several bills for the bartender, and went back to the table…

...where Guy and Asuma were well on their way to getting drunk.

"Kashi!" Guy slurred as he welcomed him back with open arms. Kakashi ignored the hug and sat down, his mind working quickly.

"Keeeenta," Asuma reminded Guy, "our bigshot _producer_ , remember?"

"Oooooo riiight!" Guy stage whispered, "No questions!"

Asuma made a dour "Kakashi Face" and they both broke down laughing.

Kakashi considered telling Yuki to cut them off as payback, but thought better of it when he realized they'd be less nosy if inebriated.

The emcee was coming out down on the stage. _So the show'll be starting soon._ Kakashi scanned the room. The lights were off in the meeting area where he'd seen Vega earlier. He had no desire to see Hanare in leather anything… well, at least… not _here…_

"I'm going to the bathroom," Kakashi announced, standing. "You guys had better order another round before the show starts!" He grinned at them with mock enthusiasm and waved peace signs in their faces before stalking off sedately to the men's room.

"Asshole," mumbled Asuma.

"Here comes Yuki!" Guy waved his arm to flag her down. "Whaddya say Asuma? Four Kamikaze Bowls?"

"Sure. Why the hell not."

…

After relieving himself Kakashi slipped past the bathrooms and through the heavy curtains around the stage. There were female voices coming from down the hall. He slid from shadow to shadow, working his way closer to the dressing room and keeping an eye out for Vega. He pressed himself flat behind an open double door as something - someone - in fringe and glitter galloped past him in platform shoes, toward the stage. He got the impression of suntan lotion and T&A, and was glad he was _behind_ the scenes during that particular act…

"... _not_ the actor." Hana's voice, up ahead. Then Yuki's.

"Oh, Rei, you're always so suspicious. He was probably just nervous. I thought he seemed nice…" Hanare said something he couldn't catch. "Yes," Yuki giggled. "I just took their table four Kamikaze Bowls. I think they're out for a good time!"

Kakashi listened to the girls laugh, feeling bad about eavesdropping but not bad enough to stop. "This is what gets Jiraiya in trouble…" he warned himself with a sigh.

He vaulted into the exposed ceiling work and shimmied along some piping. A large tube provided ample cover. He peered down over "Rei's" dressing room.

"Definitely in trouble," he muttered, closing his eyes quickly. Apparently what Hanare had meant by "lots of leather" was actually tiny pieces of leather in lots of places.

"I think this is tighter than it was last month,Yuki," Hanare whined, and both laughed.

"Ew gross! Ya your cha cha has totally gotten fat!" Yuki and Hanare dissolved into more giggles and Kakashi felt his face flushing.

Just then a door opened and Vega barged in. Kakashi instinctively reached for one of the kunai under his sweater.

"Looks like I came in at just the right time." Vega glided over to Rei. Kakashi steeled himself and looked down. The tall assassin was giving Hanare a kiss on the neck in greeting. His hands stroked her arms. The outfit she had on left next to nothing to the imagination and Kakashi bristled as Vega stepped back to look her over.

"I leave you alone for a few hours and you morph into a dominatrix," he laughed. Rei tossed her hair and brandished a long whip.

"Don't be too eager for your lesson, darling," she said lightly, cracking the scourge against the wall just inches from Vega's head. Kakashi was impressed by her accuracy.

Vega's arm snaked out in a blur and caught the whip. He gave it a hard pull, yanking Rei toward him before she had a chance to let go. Deftly he looped the whip around her body, tying her up as she fell forward into his waiting arms.

"And you don't be too eager for _yours,_ " he hissed in her ear. He reached down and gave her rear end a thorough groping before pushing her down on a chair and turning to leave. As he got to the door he paused and blew her a kiss.

"There are important business associates of mine in the audience tonight, Rei. Make sure your show's on point. And I may need to call you down for some one-on-ones."

Rei was blushing, looking at the floor. She nodded without saying anything. Vega left.

Kakashi hadn't realized he'd drawn the kunai. He stared at it in his trembling hand, trying to take a deep breath and calm down.

"Rei," Yuki was saying softly. "You okay?... I… I don't like how aggressive he is."

"Oh, don't worry Yuki!" Rei looked up and laughed, shrugging out of the whip. "He's just playing around. And I'm not taking it super seriously."

Yuki didn't seem convinced. "Yes, but is _he_ taking it seriously? You don't need to take risks to have fun, Rei."

Rei sighed. "Yuki… I promise, I'll be fine. I know what I'm doing. Okay? Thanks for being a great friend." She leaned forward and hugged the buxom hostess.

Kakashi slid back out of his hiding place in the ceiling. He'd heard enough. Time to get to work. _Let's make sure this show is on point, then._ His eyes narrowed dangerously as he climbed higher into the stage rafters.

 _And if Vega wants Hana to do favors for his friends... he'll have to kill me, first._


	8. Chapter 8

"That was the longest whizz in history!" Asuma exclaimed as Kakashi returned to the table.

"What?! A new record? A new challenge from my Eternal Rival for the title of King of the Stream of Youth!" Guy started struggling with the zipper of his pikachu jumpsuit. Kakashi just looked at him before sitting down.

"I'LL PEE FOR TWICE AS LONG." Guy ran off down the stairs toward the bathrooms.

The last act had just wrapped and the emcee was coming out.

"Seriously dude. Where were you?" Asuma was drunk but not as drunk as he was pretending to be around Guy.

"Had to take care of some things," Kakashi said vaguely, eyes on the stage.

"Smart," Asuma said. "Sometimes before a big mission I take a little extra time in the shower. Calms the nerves. I shouldn't tell you this but hell this weekend is weird enough... I got this one picture of Kuren-"

"And now ladies and mostly gentlemen…!" The emcee's voice boomed to chuckles from the audience. Kakashi was saved from Asuma's revelation. The emcee raised his hand like a circus ringleader.

"Looks can be deceiving! What looks like a delicate flower just waiting to be plundered might actually be a steel magnolia-just waiting to plunder _you_!"

Kakashi peered down at the VIP section. A man in a scarlet uniform and beret, a large boxer type and a bald man with an eyepatch were seated front and center.

The emcee waved his arm. "Tonight we have a special treat for you… the Lady Rei as you've never seen her! Prepare to be dom-"

Just then the sprinkler system came on.

Oddly enough the water fell mostly on the VIP area.

…

" _What_ is going on, Dante?!" Vega stormed up to the front desk.

"The sprinklers," Dante said in a bored voice, dialing something on intercom. "Valued patrons of Paradise, please bear with us. Drinks are on the house until we have the stage cleaned up! Please make your way to the bar or order from the nearest server!" Dante put down the phone and just looked at Vega.

"Aaasargh!" Vega slapped a hand to his forehead. _More_ free drinks? He couldn't stand the thought of giving away money.

Dante sighed. "Technical difficulties are a bitch." Vega gave him an icy stare and flung aside the curtain so he could stalk down the ramp.

Kakashi smiled as the assassin blazed past their table.

"What's so funny?" Asuma said.

"Glad we weren't in VIP tonight," Kakashi observed, sipping his whiskey.

"Ha! Yeah, those guys got soaked," Asuma chuckled between puffs.

A bevy of dancers and servers and hostesses were working to dry off the VIPs with clean towels. Vega was gesticulating and looked like he was apologizing profusely to the man in the red beret.

Kakashi didn't see Hanare in the clean up crew so he relaxed for the moment.

...Until he remembered what Vega had said about one-on-ones.

 _Now he's going to need to appease his boss. He might bring out Hana for that-_

Kakashi swore under his breath. _Should have seen it._ He looked around for Yuki. He needed to make sure Rei was busy _now…_

He spotted the little hostess on the next tier. "Yuki!" he called, jumping up from his seat. He waved at her. She glanced up. "Yuki!" he beckoned her.

"Whoa, need a drink that bad?" Asuma raised a brow. "You're not even done with that one…"

Yuki ran up to their table looking very concerned. "Yes master Kenta?"

"Yuki. I want to buy a private dance from Rei. Right now. Quickly. How do I do that?" the young producer gushed. Asuma's cigarette fell out of his mouth and bounced on the table.

"Oh! Is that the emergency?" Yuki giggled and picked up Asuma's smoke, poking it back into his mouth.

"Yes, please, I need to hurry-" Kenta was very anxious. Yuki looked at him suspiciously, but then followed his gaze down to the VIP section…

She too remembered what Vega had said and it all clicked into place. The petite pink hostess nodded. "Yes sir, private dance with Lady Rei coming right up! How much did y-"

"Four thousand dollars," Kenta said. Yuki blinked. Asuma's cigarette fell out again. "Please, Yuki…" Kenta's gaze flicked to where Vega was starting to head backstage.

Yuki snapped into action. "Meet me on B level in ten minutes, master!" she said, darting away into the milieu of people getting up for their free drinks. Kakashi watched her disappear, hoping she knew a quicker route to the dressing room than Vega…

Guy finally came back to the table. "Ha! Beat that whizz record, my rival!" He grinned proudly. "Asuma… why is your cigarette down there? You're supposed to smoke it, not just let it burn down! Plus it's a fire hazard… and not even in the ashtray! Now poor Yuki-chan will have to clean up your rudely spilled ash…"

"I'm going to… level B," Kakashi said tiredly, not caring if either of his comrades heard him or not. The game he was playing at now somehow seemed more exhausting than any mission he could remember. It was like he'd overused his Sharingan two or three times over.

"I don't know when I'll be finished. I'll see you two back at the hotel. Oh, and better give me the rest of the cash."

"No way," Asuma folded his arms. Guy looked dubious.

"Now, Kakashi, are you sure that's a good idea-"

 _Well, since they're going to be difficult…_ Kakashi sighed inwardly.

Kenta pushed aside his floppy bangs and suddenly his left eye flared red.

…

"Yuki! Okay, okay, I'm coming! What is the big rush?!" Rei trotted down the hallway with Yuki tugging on her arm. They weren't going the usual way to the upper levels. Instead Yuki was leading her on a more circuitous path that went through the utility corridors and the kitchen. Rei's spiky patent stilettos clicked across the floor.

"Sorry, Chef!" Yuki said as they ducked under some pots.

The big bearded man nodded kindly. He was used to the girls doing all kinds of strange things. "Just don't slip!" he bellowed after them in fatherly fashion. "Come get taiyaki later!" he called as they went up the stairs.

"Thank you!" Yuki and Rei said in unison.

"Sweet things," Chef murmured. Then he resumed glaring at his staff. "Get that simmering!" he shouted at a nearby cook.

Breathless, Yuki pulled Rei onto B level. The hostess sank down on the plush carpet. "Whew," she said. "We made it."

Rei chuckled. She was barely breathing hard despite running in sky-high heels. "Care to tell me what's going on, you pink terror?" She nudged Yuki playfully in her ticklish spot on her side.

"Stop it, Rei! Just looking out for you. As usual." She stuck her tongue out at her green-haired friend.

"Why are we on B," Rei said. "Lighting's better on A."

"Mister Vega's probably taking his creepy friends to A."

"Yuki!"

"We didn't want you to do a private show for them."

"Oh? So you're my manager now? That would probably have been good money-"

"Or no money."

"Wait, did you say, 'we'? Who's _we_?!"

"You wait here and I'll go set him up, and then you can find out yourself!" Yuki snapped, getting wobbily to her feet.

"Yuki, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"Oh don't worry, _Lady_ Rei! You're the best judge of character around. I'm sure everything would be great, doing privates for those goons." Yuki huffed down the hall. "Now stay there!" she hissed at Rei. "Behind the pillar. Don't ruin all my harď thankless work."

The hostess disappeared around the curve in the hall, headed toward the public entrance to level B.

Rei slumped against the pillar and felt bad. She so wished she could tell Yuki _everything…_ but she'd never put her friend in harm's way if she could help it. Rei closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She'd just need to find another way to get info on Vega's superiors.

And what was with the sprinkler incident?! She'd been counting on impressing the VIPs with her show, and getting close to them after… What a night! Things just weren't going to go easy with this job. She could feel it.

Yuki was sullenly padding back to her.

"OK. Ready."

Rei stepped over and gave her a huge hug. "I'm sorry, Yuki. Thanks for having my back."

Yuki put her face down on Rei's shoulder. "You be careful," she mumbled.

"I will. I promise. Double pinky swear!" They did, and Yuki led her down to room 3, Cloud Room. Rei started to have a depressing thought about that but shoved it out of her consciousness.

 _Save it for later_ she thought tiredly. Yuki had stopped by the door.

"Alright, Yu-yu. Who is it?" Yuki just shrugged and giggled. Rei rolled her eyes.

Yuki put a hand on the doorknob. "Don't keep him waiting! He's all yours."

Rei sighed. Yuki winked at her.

"Oh yeah-and Rei… take your time… cause he paid for like eight hours."

Yuki's casual tone caught Rei off guard. "Wait, wha-" Rei began, but Yuki swung open the door at that moment and gently pushed her friend inside.

The door clicked behind Rei. She fumed a little at Yuki while her eyes adjusted to the low lights.

She liked Cloud Room. It wasn't gauche and overdone like some of the others. The walls were painted with nice sky scenery, the ceiling had little LED fake stars. The carpet was dark blue and soft and clean. It had a minibar and a little bistro table with stools by the window that looked out over the theater interior of Paradise.

The furniture was simple dark leather and relatively new. There was a loveseat and a chaise lounge and an armchair. The client was sitting in the armchair, all the way across the room, facing her. The lights from the showroom shone through the tinted large window on the far wall and made his outline a dark silhouette.

Rei wished she was wearing something that covered her up more - or at least had more layers - because this leather outfit didn't make much pretense at hiding anything and it was harder to build up tension with everything already showing.

She swayed slowly toward the window.

"Are you my master?" she said in a sultry, throaty voice.

There was only silence in response. A long silence. And then, finally-

"I… guess so?" said a familiar voice.

Rei's heel caught on the carpet and she went flying, very unsexily, at the armchair.

"Yahhh!" she cried out, flailing wildly as she tried, unsuccessfully, to regain her balance and retain some shred of dignity. _Nope, really gonna bite it this time..._

A strong pair of arms caught her mid-fall.

Rei sank into the baggy sweater, the weird scarf. Her face smushed against a muscular shoulder and she hoped her fake eyelashes wouldn't catch on something and pull off. They fell back onto the armchair together, the body in the sweater giving Rei a comfortable place to land.

"Kendfwuh?" she ventured, her voice muffled against rough-knit cotton.

"Yeah."

Rei sighed. So this one really had Yuki's stamp of approval, huh? Why?! Rei felt peevish. _We barely know a thing about him. I'm a bad judge of character?! He could be a serial killer for all Yuki knows!_

"Don't worry, I'm not a serial killer," Kenta said softly. Rei froze. She leaned back from his chest.

"Um, that's definitely something a serial killer would say," Rei accused. Kenta's bangs flopped lazily over his left eye and he had a placid, amused (amused? how dare he!) hint of a smile on his lips.

Rei realized she was sitting on his lap and to her shame felt herself start blushing furiously. _I've sat on dozens of guys' laps. There is nothing special about his._ She had to look away, though. She felt his hazel-gray gaze on her and blushed harder.

"So what now," she said, in what she hoped was an accommodating and flirtatious voice. She winced when it came out kind of annoyed and vexed. She peeked at Kenta out of the side of her eyes and his expression had changed from calm to confused. She felt a little guilty.

"Well, aren't you supposed to dance for me, or something?" Kenta said hesitantly, and Rei was sure _he_ was blushing now.

"I can do that," Rei said, and again it came out harsher than she intended. She had never had this problem with a client before. Something about this _Kenta_ just made her feel irritable, and off balance, and confounded at the same time. Yet there was something that was so familiar about him, too… it made her too comfortable, and that was cause for her to put her guard up. _Way_ up. She didn't want to stay sitting in his lap. That would mean eventually admitting to herself that sitting in his lap felt _really good_.

No.

 _Better work, bitch._ Rei hopped off of Kenta's warm (and apparently way more muscular than that sweater let on!) body and went over to the media shelf to grab the stereo remote. She was careful not to let the carpet trip her again. Yes, it was absolutely the carpet's fault and not her nerves…

She sashayed back over to Kenta and put the remote in his lap, slowly, and on a very particular place. The young man just looked down at it in surprise.

"Pick a song," Rei suggested, finally succeeding at sounding sweet. Kenta took the remote and flipped through some tracks. He didn't look the least bit excited. He looked like a little boy trying to choose which vegetable to eat out of the dire selection his mother had given him.

Rei checked a sigh.

"What… what do you like to dance to?" Kenta blurted. He was looking up at her with kind of a desperate plea in his eyes.

Rei arched an eyebrow. _What kind of guy drops four grand just like that for a private show yet can't choose what song he wants me to strip to_?!

Rei spoke without thinking. "It depends."

"On what?" Kenta said, leaning forward ever so slightly, eyes bright with interest.

"On whether I'm dancing with someone, or dancing alone. On whether I'm romantically interested in the person… or if I'm just stripping." As soon as the words left her mouth Rei frowned. _Wait, what did I just say?_ She blinked, unable to believe that she was spilling her guts to a total stranger-

"If you were to dance with me," Kenta offered her the remote, "What song would you choose?"

"Wi… _with_ you?" Rei stammered, looking at the remote like it was booby trapped.

"Slowly." Kenta stood up and took her hand in one of his, pressing the remote into it with the other. Then he just stood there, waiting.

Rei stared at the remote and the large hands around it, covering her own. Of all the wacky requests she'd privately heard, this took the cake. Rei shook her head. She wasn't sure she could do it.

"I… I've never slow danced with a client before…" she said weakly. There was something far more intimate about this than taking her clothes off. She peered up at Kenta. His eyes were dark and patient.

She started trembling. "I… I'm sorry, I can't-"

Suddenly his arms were around her in a loose hug. "You have nothing to apologize for."

Rei felt relief flow through her. She relaxed a little. The embrace felt nice-not asking her for anything, not seeking to take something from her, not a means to an end-just… a hug.

"Thank you," she said instinctively. Then, business returned to mind. "Your money-I can have Dante refund every-"

"Oh?" Kenta leaned away from her a little, just enough to look down at her face. "Who says I want my money back?"

Rei bit her lip. "I just assumed… if I'm unable to give you what you came for, it seems wrong to keep your payment..."

"I'm not sure what I came here for," Kenta shrugged. "So no refund necessary."

Rei's brow creased in perplexity. "But… then what do you want-"

"My task was just to spend the evening with you. When the evening's over-"

Rei felt dizzy. "K-Kenta, are you sure we haven't met before? Even briefly?" Rei had a hand to her head. Kenta looked at her beautiful face, strained with worry. His heart seemed to beat irregularly. She was so close. Not pressed against him, but still, in his arms… He opened his mouth to speak, but a thought flashed across his mind.

 _Everyone you've ever cared for is dead. Don't ruin this, too._

Kenta shook his head.

Rei sighed.

 _Just let her go._ The young man raised a hand as if to stroke the dark green hair. But then the arm came up and he scratched the back of his own head instead.

"So, if my calculations are correct…" Kenta's voice had taken on a more businesslike tone. "At the rate Yuki quoted me, I'm owed about seven more hours of your time."

Rei stiffened at the change in tack of the interaction. But then, business was business…

"Yes, that sounds about right," she said a bit coolly. She turned her face to the side and didn't look at him.

"It's about six thirty now. Which means I won't let you go till 1:30 a.m."

 _Won't let me-! Who does he think he is-_ Rei leaned further away, then suddenly, her eyes narrowed. _Impossible_ was her first thought. Then, _but he really reminds me of…_

 _No. He smells different. He feels different. There is just no way. You are absolutely losing it, Rei._

"Did I say something wrong?" Kenta said, noting her expression. Rei realized she must be flaying him with her eyes. _Bigshot baby-faced producer_ _is just weird. Used to getting his way I bet._

"No, no… look Kenta, the club is only open till midnight on Sundays, and-"

"So let's leave," he said. Rei was dumbfounded. Then flustered. Then, pissed off.

"I can't just leave work!" she snapped. "It's against protocol. And as we already established, you're probably a serial killer! And, for your information, I'm supposed to meet someone after work."

Kenta looked supremely nonplussed. He leaned back a little, putting his weight on his heels and stuffing his hands in his pants pockets. "The someone gave you that necklace I suppose."

"Y… yes! Yes he did-what of it?" Rei knew she was out of line but didn't care. He could take all his money and go to hell, prying into her life-

"It's a nice necklace."

Rei threw up her hands. Kenta put one hand on his chin.

"Hmmm. What if the club wasn't open?" he said casually.

" _What?"_

"Could you leave then?"

Rei sank tiredly into the armchair. She somehow felt like she was on the wrong side of an inevitably lost battle.

"Leave to do what? Go home? Yes, I suppose if the club was to suddenly close out of the blue I could call it a night." _Go home and eat leftovers. Catch up on Game of Thrones and Luke Cage._

"Excuse me. I need to use the restroom. I'll be right back." Kenta glided out of the room and down the hall to the right. As the door clicked shut behind him, Rei cursed Yuki's name thrice over.

"She knows nothing about the kind of guys I like," Rei mumbled sullenly into her hand as she stared at the clouds painted on the wall. One of them looked a lot like Kenta's shapeless sweater…

"AAARGH," Rei stormed over to the minibar and helped herself. Vega wouldn't care what she drank from the room's stock.

She put a tiny bottle of vodka to her lips with a sigh of relief. The cool liquid had just touched her tongue when…

...the fire alarm went off.

"Gah!" Rei choked, nearly jumping out of her shoes and spitting vodka all over the carpet.

The door swung open. Kenta stood there, half in the hall light and half in the dimness of the room.

"The fire alarm." He observed.

Rei rolled her eyes. "Yes, the fire alar-"

"Better get you out of here," Kenta said.

"I can wa-"

Kenta was at her side. He stooped and slid his arm under her legs and the other behind her back, hefting her with ease. Before she could voice any word of protest Rei found herself swept up off her feet and carried over the threshold of Cloud Room…

...out into the hallway…

...and down some service stairs…

...through a plumbing room…

...out of a door that said "do not use"...

...and safely into the parking lot. Kenta put her down on the curb and they stood in silence, as chaos slowly began oozing from the club. Dancers came out, and some customers, and passers-by stopped at the sound of the alarm, to stare and point at the building.

After about ten minutes, Yuki appeared. "Rei!" she shouted, running towards them.


	9. Chapter 9

"I'm fine, Yuki." Rei smiled. Yuki held her hand and launched into a detailed, chattery account of everything that had happened. Kenta stood to the side and slightly behind Rei, hands in his pockets, staring up at the evening sky.

Rei couldn't shake the familiar feeling, but there was also nothing to be done about it. She turned her mind to other matters.

"I was supposed to meet Vega after work. But Kenta here says he paid for me up till 1:30 a.m.!" Rei raised an accusatory eyebrow at Yuki, to say _look what you've gotten me into._

Yuki put a hand over mouth. "Oh!" She glanced at Kenta, who said nothing and didn't break his gaze that was trained on admiring the night cityscape.

"Well, I don't think you need to worry about mister Vega, Rei…" Yuki looked a little flushed, like she had a funny secret.

"What?" Rei put a hand on her hip.

Yuki let a giggle escape. "Well… as I was running out here I passed the executive office, and I'm pretty sure I heard mister Vega trapped inside! He was banging on the door and using all sorts of awful words, and the door was blocked by some fallen beams and brick!"

"Yuki! You left him inside with the alarm going off?!" Rei was aghast at learning of this apparently ruthless side of her little pink hostess friend.

"There's no fire, Rei." Yuki spread her palms. "Not even any kitchen steam or stupid customer smoking in the bathroom this time. I checked around as usual to make sure the girls were all out."

Behind Rei, Kakashi-disguised-as-Kenta smiled. _Yes, Yuki would be a great ninja. Maybe there's hope for her and Guy after all, if she's this tenacious._

"And just what are you smiling about?" Hana-AKA-Rei had looked and caught him. _Damn._

"It's nice to be outside with you." Kenta said.

"That was what you wanted, right?" snapped Hana. Kakashi smiled lazily in his disguise. _She'd make a great nagging wife._

 _Wait-what was I just thinking?!_

Kenta put his hand on his chin to cover his blush. "Well, I thought you could use some air after being in that stuffy club…"

Rei blinked. She just stared at Kenta for a moment. Then she gave a slight shake of her head and turned to Yuki.

"So you're saying Vega's not going to be showing up anytime soon."

"It looked like it might take awhile to dig him out of the office," Yuki nodded.

Kenta stepped up closer to Rei's side.

"Seems you're off the hook to meet." His hazel-gray eyes avoided hers, and were instead focused on a tree across the street.

Sirens sounded in the distance. Other dancers milling around started to aggregate near their group. Rei could see Bonnie's metallic cowgirl hat and Leilani's tinsel hula skirt shining in the lamplight. Bambee gave a little wave.

Rei shivered. She looked down and realized she was still in her leather S&M themed getup that barely covered anything. She crossed her arms and huddled down a bit, thinking of how to get her stuff out of the dressing room so she wouldn't have to get on the train like this…

"Here," Kenta said. He unwrapped the scarf from his neck and began looping it around hers. Rei noticed some of the other girls turning to watch and she blushed.

"Kenta! Stop that. What are you doing?" She tried to bat his hand away but he was too quick and her neck ended up snugly mummified.

"Urk… thanks?" She saw Bonnie and Bambee giggling. "Wait, Kenta, now wha-"

"You can take this too," he said, pulling at his sleeve.

"B-but… what will you-" Rei started, unsure if the prospect of seeing him topless filled her with dread or excitement.

Kenta didn't answer. He shrugged out of his baggy sweater with ease and Rei's eyes widened...

Under the sweater there was another sweater.

"Oh," she said meekly as Kenta pulled it over her head and then stuck an arm through each sleeve like she was a life-size doll. It was more than a little awkward and Rei could hear the other girls snickering loudly. She turned cherry red as Kenta finished adjusting the oversized garment, tugging it down smoothly over her body.

"Thanks," she said politely as he straightened up. She couldn't meet his eyes. The sweater was humongous on her smaller frame and hung down past her knees. The scarf was too long and piled around her neck like a brace. And both items smelled like him-a little cinnamon and a little freshly turned earth.

She felt ridiculous, but when she finally peered up at Kenta he was looking gently at her with that not-quite-a-smile on his face, and she couldn't help but smile a fraction back.

Yuki sighed.

Rei had every intention of glaring at her best friend but just then Leilani and Bambee joined them.

"Heya Stringbean. Who's your friend?" Leilani stood tall and strong in her coconut bra and tinsel hula skirt. She looked boldly at Kenta.

"Stringbean?!" Yuki said, putting her hands on her hips.

"Psh. Just our nickname for Rei. Don't be mad," Leilani grinned. "Anyway we know you call Bambee 'Boba Butt.'"

Yuki closed her mouth and blushed. Rei looked at Bambee and Bambee shrugged.

"Got it from my mama," she said. They all giggled. Rei looked up at Kenta, who was pretending not to be paying attention but had a flushed face.

"This is Kenta," Rei began introducing him."He's… um… a producer. "

"Yeah!" Yuki squealed excitedly. "Oh I forgot to tell you mister Kenta, your manager friend and the other one were kind of drunk so I sent them home, in a cab."

"...I see. Thanks." Kenta looked uncomfortable with all the girls staring at him.

"So you're with the movie group?" Leilani said, excited.

"...Yes." Kenta glanced down at Rei, wishing she'd step in and talk so he didn't have to. But she was just looking at him with a smirk. _Probably enjoying my discomfort_ Kenta sighed inwardly. He couldn't help but notice how cute she looked in his long sweater with his scarf all the way up to her chin. The sweater showed the curves of her breasts in a very sexy way but it wasn't overwhelming like the skimpy leather outfit. He could actually look at her and not feel like his head was on fire.

"Ahem?" Leilani had an expectant look. Kenta blinked. He had no idea what he'd missed. Rei's eyebrow was quirked up.

"Sorry. My mind wandered. What were we talking about?" He looked apologetically at all the girls. _Even as Kenta it's pretty awkward being me_ Kakashi lamented to himself.

Yuki giggled. He watched as Hanare gave a little sigh. Her green hair looked very pretty in the streetlights and Kakashi realized he wanted to touch it. He clenched his hands in his pockets to make sure they behaved.

"We were talking about what to do next," Hana was saying. _I wonder why she goes by 'Rei' here_ Kakashi mused. She patted his arm in a way that was businesslike rather than affectionate… but it was still nice. "Leilani asked what we were up to."

"Hmmm." Rei watched as Kenta touched his chin and thought about it. He really was quite nice looking. His eyes were almost drowsy as he pondered and Rei found something about that very sensual. The way his wavy brown hair nearly covered his left eye gave him an air of mystery and boyishness. And he was tall.

"Well," he finally said. "I was going to take Rei out to dinner at Nobu-"

All the girls gasped. They looked from Rei to Kenta and back again. Rei swallowed. Nobu was really expensive. _What's this guy tryna pull anyway._

Kakashi noticed Hanare's discomfort at his choice of restaurant. His mind worked quickly. He'd only remembered that in _Icha Icha_ after the lap dance, Tadashi had offered to take Junko somewhere nice. The advertisement for Nobu from their hotel had been the first thing that popped into his head. _Maybe she doesn't like the food there._

"...But since you're all here, maybe it would be more… fun?... to all go out… together?" As soon as the words were out of his mouth Kakashi regretted it.

All the girls gasped again. Bambee clapped her hands together in excitement. Bonnie scurried over and whispered something in Rei's ear. Leilani nodded approval. Yuki was beaming.

Kakashi couldn't think of a more overwhelming way to spend his one evening with Hanare. He sighed. Something about all the chaos brought Naruto to mind…

"What about ramen?" Kenta proposed. All the girls squealed. Rei glanced up at the young producer and caught him staring at her with a strange look on his face. _He looks almost… wistful_ she thought. Impulsively she hooked her arm through his. His eyebrows went up.

"Dancers," she chuckled conspiratorially, "Get really, really excited about food-in case you couldn't tell already!" She had an impish grin. Kenta smiled back.

"So do nin-"

He barely caught himself. "Actors." He faked a little cough. "So do actors."

Rei nodded and appeared to have missed his slip. "There's a good ramen place this way," she said, stepping onto the sidewalk. The fire department had arrived and flashing lights filled the street. The dancers huddled up onto the curb behind Rei.

"Ugh, all our stuff is in the dressing room," Leilani complained. "I hate going out in my work clothes." Rei nodded in empathy. A lot of the girls' outfits were _really_ skimpy, and no one else had someone to give them a coverup, like Kenta had given her his sweater. The group got to the crosswalk and before they even got to the other side the girls were besieged with cat calls and whistles.

"Ah you shove it, you don't gotta chance!" Leilani made her own rude gesture at a guy who'd said something particularly lewd. The dancers held their own and either intimidated or flirted their way down the boulevard, but Kakashi still felt bad. After all, this was his idea and now a dozen women were walking down the street half naked.

"Um, Kenta-" Rei had stopped. She blushed a little saying his name.

"Yes?" he said, stooping a bit to hear her better.

"I feel really weird being the only one dressed."

"I'm dressed."

"You don't count!"

"Oh."

"I mean the other girls are in their costumes, and-"

"Do you want to give me back my sweater?"

"Wha…? No!" Rei stomped her foot. Kenta leaned away from her a little, taken aback. "Let me finish," Rei ordered.

The girls had stopped behind them to watch and were snickering at the altercation. "Fighting like an old married couple already," Bonnie drawled. The others cracked up. Rei shot them all a look. Yuki shrugged happily at her.

Rei, shaking her head, turned back to Kenta. "Um, this is a really cheap store," she began, indicating the doors they'd stopped in front of. She was blushing more.

"Mmmm hmm?" Kakashi said, guessing where she was going but not letting on. Hanare was even cuter when she was uncomfortable. She ducked her head a little in a way that Kakashi remembered intensely, green hair falling over the sides of her face, obscuring the smooth lines of her cheeks.

"Would you mind buying them all some clothes?" she blurted. Kenta raised his brow. "I… I could pay you back," she added.

Kakashi tried to do a quick calculation, but found he had no idea of the cost of women's clothing so it was futile. "I'm sure we can work something out," he said instead, which was a direct quote from _Icha Icha…_

Luckily, it worked. Hana was really red. Yuki had overheard and bounced over. She said something in Hana's ear that caused her to try and pinch the hostess in retribution.

"What'd she say," Kenta ventured.

"Nothing," Rei mumbled, looking everywhere but at him.

"Ladies! Mr. Kenta is taking us shopping!" Yuki announced. The dancers didn't need to be told twice. They stampeded through the glass doors of the shop-

 _H &M… _Kakashi read as he went in with Hanare at his side. The store clerks looked mildly interested to have so many strippers in the shop at once. The girls split up and ran off in multiple directions to look at things.

"I'm sorry," Rei said. "It's a hassle and a lot of money. Not like the fire alarm going off was your fault…"

Kenta reached up and scratched the back of his head. "Well you know what they say-no good deed goes unpunished!"

Rei eyed him. "I'll pay you back," she said firmly.

"I think I can afford it," Kenta said, sweating under his sweater a little. _I hope_ Kakashi thought. _What if I can't. What if I run out of cash._ The thought was appalling-the hero always paid in his novels.

Rei walked over to a little bench by the fitting rooms and sat down. Kenta followed her and did the same.

They were silent awhile. Hana seemed serious and lost in thought. Her toned legs weren't covered by the sweater and mocked him from her side of the bench. Her thighs looked really soft. She was still wearing the black leather boots with a pointed heel and a cutout design. Kakashi decided to stare at a rack of gray sweatshirts instead.

"Aren't you going to look for anything?" he finally said. Hanare shook her head.

"I don't need anything. I already have your sweater." She plucked at the sleeve a bit.

Kakashi thought really hard back to the shopping scene in _Icha Icha_. "You might not need anything, but maybe you want something. If I can't give you what you need, I'd like to give you what you want."

 _There_. That was close enough. Kakashi was proud of himself for paraphrasing it so closely… until he chanced a look at "Rei" and found her giving him a mild stink eye.

"That sounds really familiar," she said. "Was it from a movie?"

Kenta shrugged. "Not one you would've seen." He hoped she'd drop it.

"Try me," Rei said, narrowing her eyes. Then she giggled. "That was from a movie too."

"Oh?" Kakashi was curious.

" _Aladdin_ ," Hana smiled sheepishly.

"Disney!" Kakashi couldn't help but chuckle. Hanare elbowed "Kenta" in the ribs.

"Now you," she demanded. "I know that was from something. No guy makes up stuff like that on his own." She was staring at him with her sharp brown eyes. He wondered if this was how her targets felt when she was in kunoichi mode and had them cornered.

Kakashi swallowed. Even in his disguise it was hard to discuss his favorite fiction series. "Have you ever heard of _Icha Icha…_ ?" He braced himself.

"Oh my god, it was in the _Paradise Lost_ made-for-TV special, wasn't it? That's right, right?"

Kakashi had to let the static in his brain dissipate for a second before he answered. That TV movie was notoriously filthy and he could _not_ believe Hanare had just implied she'd seen it.

He eked out a nod. Hanare was clapping her hands gleefully. "I knew I'd heard it somewhere," she said triumphantly.

Kakashi felt a warmth along the outside of his leg. He looked down. Somewhere along the line they'd gotten closer on the bench and now their thighs were slightly touching. Hanare was leaning forward, arms crossed under her breasts. Kakashi felt the warmth moving up his body.

"So you've-?" he asked, simultaneously moving a few millimeters away from Hana to keep things under control.

"Oh I've watched it all," she said. "But I don't usually discuss it." She fiddled with his scarf around her neck, leaning toward him again. He could smell the apple shampoo in her hair, the jasmine on her skin. "Cause when I talk about it I feel like a pervert," she whispered, eyes bright and mischievous, lips curved in a devilish pout.

It was too much. Kenta stood up suddenly. Rei looked up, surprise on her face, then confusion. Kakashi turned away before he had to admit she looked hurt, too.

Just then Yuki bounded up. "Everybody's coming down to try stuff on." She held up a lace dress. "I found this. Do you think it'll look good on me, Rei?"

Rei looked away from Kenta and smiled at Yuki. She nodded. "It's a nice color for you. Why don't you try it on?"

Yuki giggled and dashed into the fitting rooms. Rei sighed. The other dancers started filing in.

"You should get something," Kenta said. Rei shook her head.

"It's already too much to ask you," she said. Kenta shifted his weight uncomfortably. Rei kept looking at the floor.

"I want to get you something," Kenta said. Rei looked up sharply.

"Why?" she asked.

Kakashi had never thought so fast in his life. _Uh… because that's what they did in my book_? He scratched his head. So far the night didn't seem to be going that great… but then again, he didn't know anything about these kinds of things.

He watched as Hanare fidgeted in he silence, smoothing her hair and then touching the necklace she wore-

The necklace. "I want to get you something," he said firmly, moving closer so he was standing over her, "Because I don't like _that_."

"M...my necklace?" she said quietly, blushing a little. "You don't like it?"

"I don't like that _I_ didn't get it for you," Kakashi said, realizing it was true only as the words slipped from his mouth. He also heard himself sound harsher than he intended. _Will she be angry_?

Hana's blush had deepened. She fingered the sapphire at her neck. Her face went from embarrassed to irritated.

"Earlier you said it was nice!"

"It is," Kenta replied. Rei threw up her hands in exasperation. Kenta's mouth curved up in a slight smile. "But I bet you would've chosen something different for yourself," he said.

Rei's mouth dropped open. Then she closed it, and narrowed her eyes at him. "You barely know me," she said. "How do you presume to know anything about what I like?"

Inside, Kakashi exulted. Outwardly, Kenta just shrugged. "I bet no one here knows the real you."

A flicker of fear passed across Hana's face. Kakashi winced, realizing his mistake. _She's keeping her identity a secret here for some reason-that was stupid. I shouldn't have said that-_

"I mean, most strippers keep up an act all the time, right?" Kenta yawned and stretched. Kakashi tried to do it as disinterestedly as possible, the way a rich and entitled young producer would. He peeked at Hanare out of the corner of his eye and was gratified when her face and body immediately relaxed. She rolled her eyes at him.

"So you're an expert on strippers now, too."

It was so far from the truth that Kakashi started to laugh, but just then Bonnie came out of the dressing room.

"Rei check this out. Y'all never seen my girls look _this_ good." Bonnie twirled her hyper-curvaceous figure in the low-cut dress. Her blonde hair bounced and the dress's floral skirt spun. Rei nodded approvingly.

"That's a very flattering look on you, Bon. You should get more 1950's stuff." Rei didn't think she'd ever seen Bonnie with that much fabric on. It was very elegant for her.

"What do YOU think?" Bonnie asked Kenta, posing shamelessly with her chest out and her hands on her hips.

"I think… it's perfect," Kenta said, keeping his eyes on the wall. Rei covered her mouth with her hand. Bonnie giggled and sashayed ludicrously back into her dressing room.

"I know you're checking me out, Rei," Bonnie said over her shoulder.

"You caught me, as usual," Rei sighed with a laugh. With Bonnie safely ensconced back in her dressing room Kenta turned back to Rei.

He mustered up more courage. "If you're not going to get anything here, let me take you somewhere else, later," he offered. The protagonist had been very persistent in _Icha Icha_. Rei gave him a skeptical look.

"I can't figure you out, Kenta," she said.

"You don't need to," he replied. She smiled tentatively. He found himself wanting her to call him by his real name. _I don't think I ever heard her say, "Kakashi"..._ he mused. What would it be like to hear his name from her lips? Kakashi felt the idea as very exciting. _But, not happening anytime soon_ he sighed inwardly, resolving to just enjoy standing near Hanare while it lasted.

Yuki's head popped out from behind the dressing room wall. "I'm not sure about this, Rei!" the pink hostess wailed, looking fretful.

"Oh come on, just come out!" Rei admonished her friend. "We've seen it all-your uniform is pretty out there, I mean." Yuki giggled and stepped out from behind the wall. "Oh!" Rei exclaimed. Yuki had on a pretty, ivory lace dress that went off her shoulders. The hem was higher in front than back, exposing her very pretty feet clad in pink sandals. The neckline of the dress showed some of her impressive bust but not too much.

"Guy will love that," Kakashi blurted before he realized what he was doing. Both women turned to him and he blushed. "The-my uh, _manager_ friend," he amended awkwardly. Now it was Yuki's turn to blush-a lot, a fact not lost on either Kakashi or Hanare-and she smoothed the front of the dress self-consciously.

"Get it," Rei ordered. "She should get it, right?" the green-haired woman prodded Kenta, actually poking him in the ribs.

"It's a great use of my money," he affirmed. Yuki, looking extremely happy, ducked back into the dressing area.

"Thanks," Rei said softly. "Yuki doesn't treat herself enough."

"Maybe you could convince her to model it for a picture I could show Manager Guy."

Rei giggled. "Kenta. That's totally creepy. But sure, why not?"

Kenta smiled. "Hey, you watched the _Icha Icha_ TV special, too."

"You shut it." Rei blushed.

Eventually all the strippers had outfits and Kakashi found himself standing at the cash register waiting to hear the grand total. The girls were clustered around him, chatting excitedly with each other about the new clothes and ramen, their unexpected night off and work gossip.

"$1,130.86 sir," the cashier said perkily. Kakashi blinked. He wasn't sure he'd ever spent anything over $50 at a time on clothes. Maybe on his special gear like his sandals and his katana harness… He dug into the hidden vest pockets under his sweater and pulled out a wad of cash. The cashier's eyes widened.

Bonnie leaned over the counter next to Kenta to check out the stack of green. "Darn it, Rei, why do you always have all the luck?!"

All the girls laughed. Kakashi counted out $1,150 and waited for his change.

"Well then," he said as he turned to go, a grand poorer. "Who's ready for some ramen?" _Still have over $3K left. Should be enough for the night. I hope._

The dancers were stampeding again, only this time toward the exit, Kenta floating along in their midst. He felt a hand on his arm.

Glancing down, he was surprised to see Rei holding on to him, her arm curled around his. A warmth spread from her hand all the way up to his chest.

Since no one was paying attention to him at the moment, Kakashi-as-Kenta indulged in a genuine smile as they passed through the glass doors and went out into the night.


	10. Chapter 10

"They just opened this location," Rei said excitedly. Kakashi glanced around and discreetly sniffed. It smelled delicious. One benefit of being out and about as Kenta was no mask interfering with culinary experiences…

The sparkling new Afuri Ramen had stood by its promise of welcoming "groups of all sizes" and did not apparently discriminate even if the group was a small herd of strippers. In fact, the chefs behind the counter seemed mildly pleased as Rei gave them a polite smile and wave. While she wasn't looking, Kakashi smiled down at her. When she looked up, he was blandly staring at the far wall.

"This is sooo nice!" Bonnie squealed. "I love trying new restaurants!"

"I heard it's ono grinds," Leilani said. "Ai ya! Not cheap though." She pointed at the price of a bowl.

"Lucky for us, that's what Master Kenta is here for!" Yuki clapped her hands together and beamed at the brown-haired "producer."

Kakashi perspired under his scarf. But outwardly he nodded at Yuki. "Of course. It _is_ my treat," Kenta said like he took a dozen girls at a time out to dinner every day of the week.

He glanced down and was rewarded for his cool with a bright smile from "Rei"-Hanare's stripper alias was easy to remember, at least. Kakashi had a nagging feeling he should find out the reason she was using a fake identity. _Is she dealing with Jomae trackers?... Maybe she's embarrassed about her job…_

Kakashi looked around the spotless dining room. It was a pretty nice place, but it was just ramen. How much could exotic dancers eat, after all? The cash he had left _had_ to be enough...

"Um, Kenta?"

 _Later. Need to focus._ Kakashi wasn't exactly sure why he needed to _not_ screw this night up, but he felt like it required his full attention.

"Mmm?" he said. Rei was looking at him from her seat at one of the four tables they were taking up. All the girls were already sitting. There were a couple empty chairs. He was still standing, and felt momentary panic- _Do I take the one next to her? Is that going to make her uncomfortable? Or, will it insult her if I don't? Do they expect me to act like I'm with her…?_

Then a thought struck him.

 _What if there's a threat? What if she's on the run or that assassin boss of hers comes snooping around… I'd better sit where I can see the door._

The girls all watched, dumbfounded, as Kenta ignored the empty seat next to Rei and walked all the way around the table, taking the empty chair diagonal from Rei and in-between Bambee and Grace.

Yuki blinked. Rei, realizing her mouth was open in the remnants of what had been a welcoming smile, snapped it closed into a terse line. Leilani smirked. Grace blushed. Bambee scooted over good-naturedly to make room. Bonnie peered out over the top of her menu in amusement. Sadie elbowed Cat, and Cat giggled. Sheila was too engrossed in her menu to care while Aoki and Barbie were already deep in shoptalk. Ginger had preemptively ordered sake for everyone. Misty had left the table in favor of chatting up a sushi chef.

"This looks good," Kenta murmured, burying his face in his menu.

Yuki shrugged at Rei. Rei gave a narrow-eyed look in response and took a long sip of sake.

Leilani, chuckling at Rei's man troubles, looked around the table. "Who else is starving? Let's get some pupus to start, yeah?"

Everyone started suggesting appetizers. When the waitress came around, they ended up ordering about ten.

Kakashi sighed.

"Oh, was that too much, mister Kenta?" Kakashi glanced to his left as he felt a soft touch on his forearm. A dancer with pale blonde hair and large dark eyes was looking up at him apologetically through long, thick eyelashes.

 _What was her name? Grace?_ "Not at all," Kenta said. "Get whatever you like."

"Dancers eat way more than it looks like we do," Sadie chimed in with a wink. Kakashi blinked.

"Well," he said. "It's a physical activity."

All the girls except Rei laughed. Rei poured herself more sake.

"Ya, Sadie works up an appetite with all her _extracurricular_ physical activities," Leilani moved her hands and Kakashi's eyes widened- _Jutsu seals...?!_

But no. It was just Leilani repeatedly sticking a finger into her curled up other hand. Kenta blushed. The other girls laughed louder.

Except Sadie. She glared. "At least my cha cha's not so big it could crack a coconut."

"Come put your face between my legs and see how big it is for yourself, honey."

"I wouldn't be able to find it since you never shave that jungle down there."

"If only they made a dildo huge enough to fill your big mouth, Sadie Cockface. I'd do everyone a favor and buy one to shut you up."

"Somewhere there's an island missing it's idio-"

"That's enough!" Rei snapped. She glared at both Leilani and Sadie. There was a tense moment.

Then Rei reached for the sake bottle. "Can't you two see I'm trying to get drunk in peace?"

The other girls laughed. Sadie snorted and Rei nodded at her. "It's true. Once again, I need to drown my romantic troubles," Rei continued, passing the bottle around, first to Leilani. "So let's toast-to business as usual for Rei!"

Hanare smiled at them all, irrefutable. Bambi and Grace filled everyone's glass on the far side of the table. Bonnie beckoned Misty back for the toast.

Kakashi raised his cup.

"To love!" Yuki added, right before they all took the shot.

With the increased sake consumption and the arrival of gyoza and yakitori, tempers mellowed and the feud was dropped. There were a lot of dirty jokes and work stories. Kakashi wasn't sure if being a shinobi was as tough a job as he'd thought.

The girls were discussing their worst experiences with wealthy foreign businessmen and politicians.

"Y'all know it's true, the rich ones can never get it up," Bonnie said between bites of teriyaki.

"Unless they blow some of their money on a shitload of Viagra beforehand," Aoki snickered.

Misty smiled impishly at Kenta. "You don't have that problem, do you?"

Kakashi stopped with a dumpling halfway to his mouth. They were all staring at him. Hanare was staring at him. Steam was starting to spout from his temples. _This can't be happening. We're discussing whether or not I can get it up?_

Kakashi avoided Rei's eyes. "Ah… _no_ ," he said, feeling his cheeks turning pink. "I don't have that particular… challenge."

 _That didn't sound like a confident producer speaking_ Kakashi kicked himself. It had sounded like himself speaking, which was skin-crawlingly awkward.

"Do you have the opposite problem, where you get hard all the time, and at inopportune moments?" Misty chirped.

Kakashi felt the steam whistling out of his ears and his face going red as he looked despairingly at the perky redhead. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Hanare cover her mouth with one hand.

Thankfully the server showed up at exactly the right time. "Would you like to order your mains now?" she said.

"Yes!" Hanare said, saving "Kenta" from more questioning. Kakashi breathed a thankful, silent sigh of relief.

"I'll have the broiled mackerel." The green-haired girl set her menu aside.

"Make that two," Kakashi said. Hana glanced quickly over at him and smiled. He smiled back-just a little.

Hanare couldn't help but notice how charmingly Kenta's slightly curly brown hair fell over his left eye; the shallow dimple in his chin… how his expression was sleepy and vague but somehow gave her the feeling there was a deep undercurrent beneath the flat surfaces of the grayish-hazel eyes.

The nagging familiar feeling thumped in her chest again. He was still looking at her. Hanare felt a warmth spreading down from her cheeks toward her collarbone. She looked away and straightened her _ohashi_ across the sauce dish.

The others ordered entrees and more sake, and conversation broke up into smaller groups again.

Kakashi took a sip of his sake and peered across the table through his eyelashes. Hana was leaning forward and to her left, telling Bambi about the old man with the yachts who'd been trying to talk to her at the Paradise bar.

The way she was sitting with her arms crossed under her chest kind of squished her breasts forward and Kakashi caught himself as his gaze had drifted down into the folds of his brown sweater that clung to her body.

Hana was busy doing a perfect imitation of the yacht guy that had Bambee in stitches so luckily, she didn't notice.

"An' I'd even letcha play with the boom if you behave like a nice gal-" Hana said in a deep heavily accented baritone, and wiggled her eyebrows lecherously at Bambee.

"Rei!" Bambee gasped, giggling, "Stop! I'm going to pee."

"Well I ain't ever done that particular sex-tivity now missy but I 'spose thar's a first time fer everythang-"

Bambee snorted and Hanare finally broke down mid-impersonation. Kakashi was laughing too.

"You do that well," he said without thinking.

Hanare composed her chuckles into an impish smile. It was the cutest thing the copy ninja had ever seen. Her green hair shone under the lights of the restaurant. There were some potted bamboo behind her that framed her like a painting. His scarf was still around her neck. Her skin looked soft above the beige of the scarf…

If only it was just his scarf around her neck, and not also that sapphire.

 _Yeah. She doesn't even need the sweater. Just the-_

Kakashi snapped his eyes open wide, realizing what he'd been thinking. Hanare was looking at him. Her eyes were narrowed and her smile had turned to a definite smirk.

"Something on your mind?" she said, slowly taking a drink of sake. Her large brown eyes looked up at him as she sipped. Kakashi felt a precarious sensation in a particular region. Good thing his Kenta outfit was _really_ baggy. He thought of Guy in a sweaty jumpsuit, and immediately felt less excited. It was an old trick he'd used for years.

"I still don't like that necklace," Kenta said calmly. Rei glared.

"Well why don't you do something about it, then?!" she snapped, stretching her neck so the light hit the sapphire and made it sparkle offensively. Kakashi had to resist the urge to noticeably grit his teeth. The damn thing was really starting to aggravate him.

The other girls had gone quiet at Rei's outburst, and now they were all looking at Kenta. He took a drink and cleared his throat.

"After everyone's had enough to eat, it looks like more _shopping_ is on our agenda," he said pointedly, looking right at Rei. "I trust you ladies can lead me to a jewelry store?"

A gasp of collective glee, followed by dissent as to which jewelry shop should be targeted, erupted from their tables and Kakashi stifled an inner cringe. _More shopping._ Endless. Shopping. _More money_ … He could tell by the dancers' comments that they had a good deal of opinion and expertise in this area, which likely meant a huge blow to his pocketbook. _Well, to Asuma and Guy's technically…_ But that was water under the bridge.

Rei was staring at him with a strange expression he couldn't read. It looked part furious, part sympathetic. Maybe slightly guilty. Kakashi had no idea if he was playing this game correctly, and that depressed him.

The main courses arrived. The girls finished eating quickly, motivated by the prospect of browsing sparkly things. Kakashi sighed. Many of his friends were the same way around ninja gear. He was that way himself, around adult books and certain types of manga.

The night was in full swing when they exited the restaurant. With full bellies and Kenta's wallet a few hundred dollars lighter, they headed toward one of the big hotel's shopping boardwalks, following Bambee. Supposedly the best jewelry was to be had in that particular area. Palms blew softly in the night breeze. It was warm and crowded, tourists everywhere. The girls seemed to be enjoying their night off, getting to experience the city recreationally instead of as professionals. Kakashi smiled at that to himself. He knew what it felt like to be overworked and underappreciated.

Rei glanced at Kenta and saw him grin a little. _What a strange, strange guy_ she thought. He said little, but every time she was around him it was like she could _feel_ his thoughts and energy. And there was the nagging familiarity that hadn't diminished. _I must be getting old and crazy_ Hanare sighed inwardly. _And so what if he does like Rei. What am I going to do about it? It's not like he likes…_ _ **me**_ …

It was just another hazard of the job. Hanare's mind filled with melancholy as Rei smiled and carried on a conversation about shoes with Misty. She was so used to doing multiple things with different parts of her brain that it didn't faze her a bit. _Though I guess it does make me sort of like a robot_ Hanare concluded dourly.

Misty trotted off to ask Leilani about a brand of sandals. Hanare stared at the street lights until Kenta leaned over and startled her.

"Everyone's having fun but you," he said softly. "Why?"

Rei shook her head. "I'm having a great time! What are you talking about? And don't sneak up on me like that - what are you anyway? A ninja?" She'd meant it teasingly - mostly - but Kenta stiffened and Hanare wondered why. The producer drifted slightly further away from her and she felt immediately guilty. He was paying so much money to hang out with her…

Rei's arm snaked out and she grabbed ahold of Kenta, pulling him back to her. "I'm sorry," she said. "I didn't mean to snap at you. I startle easily." Kenta didn't resist her touch. He fell into step with her, shortening his stride. She held on to his arm and noted, for just a moment, how it made it easier to walk. The crowds parted for them. The cracks in the sidewalks didn't seem so menacing to her high heels. And he smelled nice.

Bambee was waving at them from the front of the group. A palatial building with a European theme loomed up ahead. The lights were golden, the fountain in front sparkled. The sky was a perfect backdrop of dark blue and violet. A strip of well-lit shops were visible along the avenue. Kenta was looking down at the top of Rei's head and admiring her green hair when he noticed her frown.

"Bambee…!" she called. The curvaceous dancer stopped and waited for Rei and Kenta to catch up. Rei leaned over to her and Kakashi pretended to not be able to hear what she was whispering.

"Bambee! That's the most expensive place in the city!"

"He can afford it - did you want to go to some pawn shop instead?" Bambee giggled.

"Well, no - but this is too much, really…"

"Rei, you need to learn to let a guy treat you if he wants to," Bambee's large dark feline eyes were kind and sympathetic.

"I… I don't want to owe him…" Rei mumbled. Bambee shook her head.

"You wouldn't, honey! No matter how much he spent. Rei, you have serious control issues. But if it makes you uncomfortable…" Bambee thought for a second. "We could go down to the boardwalk, so he could get you something nice and cute but not break the bank?"

Rei nodded. "I'd like that!" she said. Bambee squeezed Rei's arm and shouted out to everyone.

"Detour! Follow me, nasty women. And Kenta." Everyone laughed and they took a left across the street, toward the water.

Hanare breathed easier. She slowed and dropped back to walking alongside the producer.

"Everything ok?" Kenta inquired, looking down at her sleepily.

"Oh, yeah - fine! Bambee was… um, just taking us to a really nice store… but um… I heard they don't source all their gems sustainably, so I'd rather get something local." Hanare lied with bits of truth woven in. She did care about such things, after all…

Kenta raised an eyebrow. "I see," he said seriously. "You're very kind to take those issues into consideration."

Hanare swallowed. She felt too warm with all this walking and lying. She loosened the scarf around her neck. "It's not exactly kindness…" she said. "More just the right thing to do. It's responsible not to take advantage of people."

Kenta nodded. "Not everyone thinks that way." They were going down a slight grade as the street wound down to the seaside.

"Well they should," Hanare said firmly, taking his arm to steady herself as she navigated the slope in her sky-high stilettos.

Kenta didn't say anything, but he put his hand over her hand that was curled around his arm. Hanare blinked but pretended not to notice. She wanted him to move it, but didn't ask him too. Maybe she _didn't_ want him to move it. She wasn't sure, and that really bothered her.

Kakashi looked down at Hanare whenever she wasn't looking at him. He found he didn't mind calling her Rei - it was kind of cute. She was the same person, anyway. _A rose by any other name…_ isn't that how it went? Kakashi wasn't sure. He was better at remembering _Icha Icha_.

This part of town was more casual and had a mix of locals and tourists. Delicious smells and the sounds of cooking came from street vendors and food carts. Shops were one-of-a-kind for the most part, instead of recognizable chains. Paper lanterns were strung between streetlights, adding whimsical soft pastel colors to the scene. Flowering shrubs interspersed the palms, and you could smell the blossoms.

Up ahead was a little shopping center strip made to look like huts to go with the beach theme. Beyond that, Kakashi could see the actual beach and more hotels, then finally the dark sapphirine sea and its gentle waves.

The strippers and Kenta descended on the outdoor mall. There were street vendors hawking everything from windchimes to sarongs… signed pictures of Elvis to shell leis. The smells of food and suntan lotion were heavy in the air. The sounds of a band playing somewhere - bongos and ukulele - carried over above the general noise of shopping and laughing.

A brightly lit store with conch shells hanging above the entrance seemed to catch Hanare's eye. Kakashi followed as she veered toward it. A live parrot was outside and Misty and Bonnie stopped to pet and admire it, chatting with the parrot's charming, tanned handler. Yuki and Bambee crowded in to snap a selfie. Hanare bypassed the parrot and ducked into the store, pulling Kenta along behind her.

Inside, the shop was made up of many smaller counters and kiosks, each boasting jewelry and knickknacks in varied styles. Hanare seemed right at home, browsing and visiting with the vendors, but Kakashi was dizzy from sensory overload. There were just so many items. So many snippets of conversation… so many strange fragrances. And somewhere along the way, Hana had started holding his hand. Kakashi couldn't remember when. Or why.

 _Why?_ _Does it matter?_ He couldn't stop thinking about it. _Kenta's hand, not mine…_ he reminded himself. Hanare seemed unaware herself of the change… unless that was part of her act. _I don't know her very well - how do I know she's acting at all? What part is an act and what isn't? Am I… I mean, is Kenta just part of her cover? This is a cover, right? Or is it just the home she found without me…_

"Kenta?"

Kakashi shook his head, for a moment paralyzed by the implications of his thoughts and with the fear that perhaps he was so transparent that someone had read them. He glanced down. Hanare was looking up at him, a perplexed smile on her face. Her brown eyes were gently concerned; her pretty lips pursed in an unspoken question. Kakashi realized he could look at that face a long time and never grow tired of it.

"Yeah, Rei?" Kenta said, returning her smile with a careful one of his own.

She giggled. "Yuki's always accusing me of being spacey - looks like I've met my match!" The green-haired girl poked him in the ribs. _Are we… a match?_ Kakashi knew that wasn't what she meant, but the words struck him anyway. A strange feeling was growing in his heart and mind and he wasn't sure he liked it.

"Sorry. I was just… thinking…" he said vaguely.

"About me, of course," Hanare said and batted her eyelashes at him. Kakashi blushed. _She couldn't know…_ "And how much money you'd like to spend right here on Auntie Bola's fine handcrafted jewelry, right?" Hanare was giving him a big wink and then she and the vendor - Auntie, he presumed - broke out laughing.

"What a nice young man," the elegant woman behind the counter said. "Only the decent ones blush, Rei-chan. You should hang on to him." Kakashi felt his fingers twitch. The parrot cawed outside.

Hanare suddenly seemed to realize she was holding his hand. "I guess… I am," she murmured. And promptly let go.

Kakashi tried not to feel anything about it, and put his hand in his pocket. Hanare had turned away and was looking studiously into Auntie Bola's jewelry case.

"See something you like?" Kakashi said, making sure Kenta was using his smoothest sweet-talking voice - the voice that got Hokages to agree with him and Tenzo to pay for his ramen. _If nothing else, I'm getting that damn sapphire off her neck._ Competitive anger was something Kakashi could deal with. Yes, and he could deal with it well, when motivated…

"Um." Hanare was fiddling with the ends of his scarf that now hung loosely around her neck. The baggy sweater was either making her too hot and she was getting flushed with warmth, or else she was blushing.

"My style is perfect for Rei," Auntie Bola said. "But I only work in gold. She never could treat herself before even though she and the other girls work so hard."

"Auntie!" Hanare was definitely blushing now.

"Well, that's what I'm here for," Kakashi said. It seemed like a producer-ly thing to say. "Get whatever you like."

Hanare was silently staring at the case. Kakashi held his breath, afraid she might change her mind and refuse to let him get her anything. Or, that she'd choose something way out of his price range and he'd be shamed out of the store, tail between his legs… He'd be stuck staring at Vega's rock all night and would have to figure out another route to its demise…

"Could you take that one out, Auntie?" Hana pointed at something. Auntie Bola smiled happily and unlocked the case, reaching for a tray. Kakashi sighed inaudibly in relief. She was choosing something and it looked like the tray wasn't overflowing with diamonds or anything.

"This one, yeah?" The jeweler lifted a sparkling something from the tray. It was a gold chain, with a… Kakashi's eyes widened.

"The little leaf, eh?" Auntie smiled gently as she unclasped the chain. "It means good things will grow. It has green energy, like your hair." Hanare turned around so Auntie could lean over the counter and put it around her neck. Kakashi couldn't take his eyes off the necklace. He watched as Hanare's graceful fingers moved her hair aside, tucked the sapphire under the sweater… and the golden leaf took its place. He felt like his heart was beating in slow motion.

"Why a leaf?" he blurted.

Both Hanare and Auntie turned to him with weird looks - Auntie's kind of aggressive, Hana's kind of surprised and suspicious… then embarrassed.

"Why _not_ a leaf?!" Auntie said, finishing doing up the clasp. She put her hand on her hip and raised an eyebrow at the young producer.

"I… I didn't mean to be rude," Kenta amended. "I was just curious…"

Auntie handed Hanare a small mirror. Hana held it up and looked at herself, adjusting the charm on the chain. There was no mistake. It was a finely made leaf-shaped charm that closely resembled the shape of the Konoha symbol. Kakashi felt a little light-headed. He tried to pinpoint his feelings and found that he couldn't.

"It looks beautiful. On you," he said, both slightly hoarse and very awkward. Hanare's eye were downcast, her cheeks pink. Auntie was staring at him. She nodded.

"Perhaps the matching bracelet?" she lifted out another tray with a smile.

Hanare laughed. "Auntie!" The women shared a chuckle. Kakashi couldn't figure it out. He scratched his head.

"Is that the one you want?" he asked Hanare. She nodded.

Auntie took out a gift box. "Rei's had her eye on it a long time."

"Better late than never," Kenta said. Hanare glanced up at him. He smiled at her. She almost smiled back.

"Thank you," she said seriously.

"You just want to wear it, honey?" Auntie proffered the gift box. Hanare nodded. "I thought so!" Auntie put the box in a pretty bag and handed it to Kenta. He took it and reached inside his vest, looking away from the enchanting sight of Hana in the leaf necklace to settle up with Auntie.

"What do I owe you?" Kakashi tried not to sweat the answer.

Auntie shrugged. "For you, $499."

"Th-thanks…?" Kakashi managed to say. _Thank Gamabunta that Bambee didn't take us to that other shop-_ he thought fervently. _I wouldn't have had enough judging by what Hana was saying…_ The Copy Ninja unfurled the necessary bills from his diminishing stack of funds.

"A pleasure. Thank you," Auntie nodded, accepting the payment.

"Thank you," Kakashi said. He looked at Hanare. She was touching the leaf at her neck, a faraway smile on her face. The sapphire was nowhere to be seen - banished beneath the brown fabric of the baggy sweater. Kakashi smugly put his hands in his pockets.

"I like it," he said. Hana turned to him and her smile faded.

"I'm glad," she said, but seemed to be burdened by something. Then the bright smile returned. "Auntie, thank you so much!" The jeweler stepped out from behind the counter and Hanare moved in to give her a big hug.

Kakashi scratched his head, silently trying to figure out what could be on Hana's mind. He figured she'd be happier, about the necklace…

"Rei!" Barbie, Aoki and Grace had found them. "Oooh, is that what he got you?" They crowded around to see the charm. "So kawaii!" he heard Barbie say. Aoki was nodding vigorously, magenta mohawk swaying. Grace touched it very carefully.

"It's lovely on you, Rei!" Grace whispered.

"Kenta has great taste," Hana replied, giving him all the credit. The girls turned and smiled at him. Kakashi shrugged and looked away. They all giggled.

"Rei, Bonnie has a great idea," Aoki said.

"Everyone's done shopping, so…" Grace said quietly.

"KARAOKE!" Barbie threw her hands in the air.


	11. Chapter 11

"K… karaoke?" Kenta stammered. Hanare looked at him in amusement. The producer sounded nervous.

"Yes!" Barbie clapped, her raven bun bouncing as she nodded gleefully. "Won't that be fun? Rei loves to sing. She has an amazing voice, Mister Kenta, you should hear her…"

"It's nothing special," Hanare mumbled, blushing. She _did_ like karaoke. She knew she was a good singer. She _wasn't_ sure she wanted to sing in front of this strange client…

Kenta swallowed. "I don't really…" He reached up and scratched his head. Hanare was sure he looked a couple shades paler.

"You don't have to sing if you don't want to," she said, reaching out to put a reassuring hand on his arm.

"But you will after a few drinks!" Aoki said, and all the girls laughed. They surrounded him and dragged him out of the jewelry shop. Auntie Bola watched them go, shaking her head fondly.

Out on the boardwalk, Aoki and Barbie released Kenta and they and Grace went over to see who Sadie was talking to over at a malasada cart.

Rei came up next to him and she and Kenta stood alone at the rail together, tourists and revelers passing by in an endless flow of human energy.

"You asked me 'why a leaf' back there," Rei said quietly. The lanterns shone down on her, casting purple and pink across her youthful face and emerald hair.

"It's alright. You don't have to tell me," Kenta said contentedly, hands in his pockets.

Rei smiled. "It reminds me of home," she said. Kakashi was stunned. He kept his eyes on a swaying lantern across the way and showed no outward reaction.

"Where's home?" he asked casually, hoping Kenta looked calm and cool. Inside Kakashi felt like he couldn't breathe.

"At the bar… when we talked… I mentioned a village in the land of fire?" Hanare was saying, her eyes on the railing. Kakashi could feel the warmth of her arm against his. They were an island in a sea of strangers. The leaf necklace sparkled in the lantern light.

"You said it was your favorite place you'd visited," Kakashi recalled.

"It is," Hanare said simply. "It's also my home. I… haven't been back in awhile…"

Kenta didn't answer at first, because the strange feeling that had started earlier was exploding into something else, right at this moment, and it was sure to cause _Kakashi_ a lot of problems.

"Maybe we can go together," Kakashi said, and as he heard himself speak the words, he knew it was him saying them and not Kenta. He knew.

 _I want... to go home, with Hanare._

She was looking up at him, brown eyes wide. Kakashi realized he was staring at her, and watched the gentle blush appear across her cheeks. He turned toward her and leaned down, reaching up to pull down his mask…

 _Wait. I'm not wearing a mask._

Kakashi froze. He panicked. _Kenta_ was about to kiss _Rei_. This was all wrong and potentially disastrous. He jerked back and used the hand that had been about to stroke the green hair to shove his own hair out of his left eye, instead. A sidelong glance at Hana showed him she'd closed her eyes in anticipation of being kissed, and now she cracked one eye open in confusion.

"Kenta…?" she said timidly. When she realized what had happened, the confounded expression changed to a scathing glare. Kakashi backed up a step.

"WHAT was that?!" she demanded, loud enough for him to feel uncomfortable but still quiet enough that no one paid them any mind. She put her hands on her hips. "I thought you were about to… to…" Now Hana's look changed to sheer frustration and tired defeat. At his silence she tossed her head and turned away.

"I get all the weird ones," she muttered into the night. Kakashi watched as a sadness passed over her face… that was quickly replaced by an embarrassed half-smile.

"Sorry I snapped at you," she whispered. "I don't know anything about you. We aren't together. I've no right. You've been… very kind to me."

Hanare's words were neat and elegant, controlled and perfect; like the persona she had on that day in Konoha… Kakashi could hear the sorrow underneath, though. _Because I'm like that, too._

"It's ok. I'm sure I earned it one way or another," he said. Hana cracked a genuine smile. Bonnie was waving at them from across the street. Everyone had reconvened, it seemed, preparatory to hitting the karaoke joint.

Kenta cleared his throat. "I know we're not together, Rei… but would you mind… would you hold my hand?"

She looked up at him in surprise. _He did pay a lot for this time…_ Of course, any request could be denied - it was her prerogative - but did she want to deny this? _What if there wasn't any money involved…_

"Sure, Kenta," Rei said. She reached out and took his hand gently. His palm was large and comfortable, and she noticed her hand fit inside of his nicely.

"Thank you," he said. His languid hazel-gray gaze was back in place, calm and placid. He looked down at her with sleepy eyes and a slight upturn of the corner of his lips. Hanare realized he made her feel calm, too.

"Hai, lovebirds! Let's GO," Leilani yelled across the plaza at them.

"We're COMING," Rei yelled back. Kenta laughed. It was the most "unladylike" he'd seen her and it was adorable. Hand-in-hand, they ran across the crowded street, Hanare leading, Kakashi following… half-pulled, willingly…

…

The karaoke lounge wasn't too far away, vaguely back in the direction of Pink Paradise. _Vanilla Vanilla_ it was called, and boasted a full bar as well as bubble tea.

There was glitter and sherbet colors everywhere, and balloons crammed in every corner. The door, order window, and most of the furniture was heart-shaped. The staff were all good-looking young men with sleek pastel hairdos. Walking into all that, Kakashi felt like a potato in his Kenta disguise.

The girls wanted to rent a private room, which Kakashi was only too happy to spring for since it meant no singing to the _general_ public under the spotlight out in the fuschia main lounge next to the bar. Hopefully he could avoid singing at all - but you never could be sure in this type of situation…

A couple of the girls ordered shakes, some drinks, and most drinks _and_ shakes. Kakashi watched in amusement as Hanare got a shot of brandy and poured it directly into her lychee drink.

"Try it," she said, catching him looking. She held the straw up to his lips. The Copy Ninja took a cautious sip. He wasn't a heavy drinker… mostly because when he drank, he drank heavily, and when he drank heavily he blacked out in places like Guy's bathtub.

"That's damned delicious," he said, surprised. Hana beamed up at him.

"I made it up myself," she said. "I call it 'Scarecrow on the Beach' because it chases your troubles away."

Kenta choked mid-swallow and started coughing a little. "Are you okay?" Rei patted him on the back in concern.

"Yeah. Fine," Kenta managed, hoarsely. He took a sip of his beer. It helped wash the incident down.

The girls had collected their drinks and snacks from the bar and, laughing, they followed the host to their private room.

"Have a good tiiime!" The violet-haired host winked at Kakashi and shut the door behind them. Kakashi drank more beer nervously.

The room seemed to have a… _chocolate_ theme, which Kakashi found exceedingly strange in a place called Vanilla Vanilla. The furniture was all shades of brown and shaped like candy bars or truffles. The walls were painted with a mural that showed gingerbread people and gummy bears skinnydipping in a chocolate ocean. A strobe light hung from the middle of the ceiling. The karaoke setup was on one wall, with a little mini heart-shaped stage next to it. And there were a couple stripper poles in the corners… ideal, considering who his companions were tonight…

Kakashi sighed. Bonnie was firing up the karaoke system. Sadie was already on a pole. Hanare was… _watching me and laughing?_

"You look like you're going into battle!" She broke down in giggles. "Kenta, it's just a karaoke bar…" Kakashi couldn't help but roll his eyes. Hana grabbed his arm and dragged him to a chair that looked like a cupcake. She shoved him down into it. "You _are_ paying me," she said. "I should make sure you have a good time… or at least, aren't totally miserable!" She laughed again.

Kakashi stared up at her. _Well, she got feisty… is it the alcohol talking? That was fast…_ He side-eyed Hanare's drink. Indeed, it was more than half empty. _She had sake at the restaurant, too… We all did. Maybe a lot more than I realized…_ He slowly sipped his beer, attempting a calculation of how much drinking would be reasonable here without anyone getting trashed…

But then Britney Spears came blasting out of the speakers and Kakashi lost any hope of thinking straight.

"I'm addicted to you... DON'T YOU KNOW THAT YOU'RE TOXIC!" Bonnie was singing at the top of her lungs, and everyone joined in. Kakashi couldn't think of another place he wanted to be less. Orochimaru's lab… maybe? But… Hana was _here…_ and that made all the difference…

She was dancing around with Barbie. Kakashi looked down and noticed his beer was empty. Someone took the bottle from his hand and replaced it with a glass full of something chilled. He glanced up - it was Grace. She smiled shyly. "Vodka," she said.

"Thanks…" Kakashi said, wishing he wasn't stuck in Kenta's sweater all night. Grace floated away… she had a very delicate walk… he tugged at the collar of the sweater. The strobe light was dizzying. Now Aoki was singing Shania Twain and Leilani and Sadie were having some kind of dance-off… on the poles.

"So you got the look, but have you got the touch?" Aoki had a good voice. Hanare seemed to like this song; she knew all the words. Bonnie was leading the other girls in a line dance, but Hana was swaying over toward his chair… she twirled in his sweater like it was a dress, flipping her hair… it flashed green under the strobe…

"Now don't get me wrong, I think you're all right…" sang Aoki, and Hana was grinning at him, mouthing the words. "But that won't keep me warm…"

She was close, now, dancing right in front of his knees. The sweater rose teasingly as she swayed her hips. "On the long, cold, lonely nights…" Hana sang, lifting her arms up and clapping along to Bonnie's lead. A flash of black leather panties didn't escape Kakashi's gaze. He raised his glass to his lips to cool off… but realized it was already empty.

"Allow me," Rei - Hanare - said, taking the glass while still moving to the rhythm of the music. She really was an excellent dancer. The glass vanished and suddenly Hana was straddling him, tilting a bottle of champagne into a flute. She poured while singing and winking at him. Kakashi had no idea where the bottle had come from. Behind Hana he could see Misty getting on stage for a new song…

He took the glass of bubbly. Hana was still sitting across his lap. She leaned in close to him and whispered, "Maybe it's a good night to celebrate." The gold leaf charm glittered on her chest. Kakashi took a sip of champagne and noticed that to his left, Leilani and Sadie were making out. Grace was on one of the poles, now.

Misty was singing. "Promiscuous girl…" Hana was… _agitating_ his lap. _No. Not mine - Kenta's_. Kakashi looked at the glass in his hand. Empty. _How does this keep happening_? The copy ninja knew it was too fast. But he didn't want to stop. He reached out and ran his hand up Hana's waist, under the sweater. She arched her back.

"Don't you know about the No Touching rule, Master Kenta?" she said breathlessly. His hand reflexly closed around the leather straps of the skimpy costume underneath.

"What about this? Is this allowed?" he growled, yanking her closer to him. Hana gasped. Kakashi felt angry and didn't know why. "My glass is empty," he said. "Fill it." Hana blinked, but reached out obediently and got the bottle. She poured a refill for him into the flute.

"I want my sweater back," Kenta said. "Take it off." Kakashi emptied the glass into his mouth, watching eagerly as Hanare blushed but did as she was told, lifting the sweater up, over her head… The leather outfit was miniscule and bound her body in certain places only in order to make all the good bits stand out. Kakashi heard the song change. Barbie was singing Call Me Maybe. Kakashi set his glass down carelessly and grabbed Hanare around the waist with both hands, pushing her down onto his crotch, where he was so hard for her that it hurt…

"Kenta!" Hana was squirming and glaring at him. "Stop it! What are you doing?!"

"What? Don't you do this for all your clients?" Kakashi hissed. He realized what he'd said a moment too late. Hanare stopped, stunned…

"Rei, wait, I'm sorry-" Kakashi tried to say, but Hanare's hand was already in motion. Kakashi caught her fist an inch from his jaw. "Hana, please-"

Her knee came up and Kakashi had to twist and close his legs to narrowly avoid the blow to his nuts. He looked into her face as he parried the attack and saw tears in her eyes. _Damn, what have I done…._

"Hanare, please, listen, let me-" Kakashi tried to reach out to her but his head was pounding. He had the vague impression of girls crowding around them. He could hear the song, still… _I want you so so bad…_

Barbie singing. Leilani's angry face, threatening him. Bonnie hugging Hana… Hanare… _did I call her that out loud? Oh no… I ruined her cover, didn't I…_ Yuki, standing in front of him, arms blocking the others… Hana, looking at him, eyes wide…

Kakashi felt himself falling onto the floor. The leaf necklace around Hanare's neck, glittering so perfectly on her skin… the image teased his consciousness.

 _At least… it's not Guy's bathtub_ he thought, before everything went black.


	12. Chapter 12

Kakashi woke up in the rain.

Cold drops were falling on his unmasked face and he startled, tried to sit up - before a splitting headache forced him back down. He lay there, breathing hard, squinting uncertainly up into a gray, cloud-filled sky.

 _I'm on the hotel balcony_. The raindrops were sharp and unkind, soaking through his clothes rapidly and making him uncomfortable. But Kakashi didn't move. He lay there, knowing the sick feeling in his gut wasn't just from alcohol. He didn't really want to think about it.

Usually he could avoid thinking too much by having _Icha Icha_ on hand or keeping his mind on a mission. He had neither option available at the moment, however, and the rain clouds seemed bent on sending him a certain message.

He closed his eyes but still… all he could see was Hanare's stricken face, eyes wide and shocked into tears. Kakashi felt like he wanted to vomit.

 _What have I done_. The rain washed down over his face and he was glad. Guy would probably appear at any moment and Kakashi would rather not anyone notice he was…

"KAKASHI!" Right on cue the sliding door of the balcony slammed open and a distraught, yelling Green Beast was at his side. Kakashi sighed inaudibly into the rain, glad for the noise if only because it drowned out his unbearable shame. He cracked an eye open.

"It's alright, Guy," he said, hoping to alleviate Guy's concern and make his actions less frantic. Guy was all over him. Kakashi went to drop the Kenta disguise but as he did so, realized it was already gone.

 _When did that happen?_ He shuddered. _At the karaoke bar? After?_ He couldn't wrap his mind around how badly he'd blown the evening. The failure felt like a physical wound in his vitals.

"Kakashi, stay with me," Guy was saying, ever dramatic… the jumpsuit-clad shinobi was checking his pulse, patting his cheek, groping various areas checking for damage…

"Guy. Relax," Kakashi sighed. "I'm okay." The Green Beast _harumphed_ and kept working him over. "Really I'm fine," Kakashi said, annoyance growing.

"You don't look it," Guy said skeptically. He patted Kakashi down around the torso. A folded piece of paper fell out of Kakashi's vest. Guy snatched it up.

"What… hey!" Kakashi protested, heart leaping at the thought it might be a note from Hanare. He reached for the paper but Guy held it away from him. " _Guy_!" Kakashi growled.

Guy was already reading it. His lips moved soundlessly as his intense black eyes flicked back and forth. His brow furrowed, then his trademark thick eyebrows shot straight up. "It's… it's from _Yuki_ ," he said breathlessly, cheeks flushing.

Kakashi took the opportunity to grab the note away and read it himself. Hopeful at first, his mood plummeted as he digested the hostess's words.

 _Dear Mister Kenta_

 _You passed out at karaoke so I took you home. Rei isn't feeling well so please don't look for her today. It might be best if you rest and then head home. I am personally very sorry that things turned out that way last night. I know you must feel badly about your mistake._

 _Rei has a busy day today including a dinner rendezvous with Mr. Vega. Please allow her to enjoy her plans without incident. She has been very stressed lately and it is affecting her work. Her work is very important to her and she likes to focus._

 _Please consider your friendship with Rei before you undertake any actions today._

 _You still had an hour and a half left of the time you paid for with Rei, so I have included that amount refunded with this note._

 _Best regards_

 _Yuki_

Kakashi resisted the urge to chidori the piece of paper. Instead he handed it listlessly back to Guy, who was pocketing the cash. Guy carefully folded the note and put it in his pocket.

"Rough night, eh Kakashi?" Guy murmured. Kakashi just lay there. They were in silent in the rain.

"I don't want to talk about it," Kakashi finally said. He shivered.

"At least let's get you inside, before you catch your death out here," Guy said. Kakashi sulked at the clouds. Guy clucked at him like a mother hen and then thrust his arms beneath the Copy Ninja.

"Hey!" Kakashi said. Guy lifted him up easily and carried the soggy Sharingan user bridal-style into the hotel suite.

"Oh good, Romeo's back." Asuma's voice was brusque and muffled by a cigarette. He was stretched out on his bed watching an infomercial. The young Sarutobi scratched his roguish facial hair and eyed the others dubiously.

Guy set Kakashi down gently on the edge of the other bed, as if he might break. "Thanks," Kakashi mumbled ungraciously. Guy put his hands on his hips.

"You need to get out of those wet clothes!" he scolded.

"Yeah!" Asuma concurred. "You're dripping all over the floor!"

Guy reached for Kakashi's vest. Kakashi batted his hands away. "I can do it myself, Guy." Irritably he shrugged off his vest and handed it to Guy, who went and hung it in the bathroom.

"You're still getting the bed wet," Asuma noted. Kakashi staggered to his feet. _I'll just go change_ he thought, right before he stumbled. Guy was there to catch him.

"Easy, Kakashi! You're in bad shape." Guy guided him to the bathroom and sat him on the closed toilet. Kakashi breathed carefully - the floor was tilting and he felt like he might actually puke.

"What's wrong with 'im?" Asuma's voice seemed to blare aggravatingly in Kakashi's ears.

"Hangover. And a broken heart," Guy intoned.

Kakashi threw up.

"So you had ramen!" Guy exclaimed.

"Dibs not cleaning that shit up," Asuma said.

Kakashi stared at the floor, eyes unfocused as he robotically wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Guy threw a towel over the puke. Kakashi just wanted to go to sleep and wake up when this was all a distant memory.

"Did you spend all our money?" Asuma was saying.

Kakashi shivered again. All he could think about was a gold leaf charm on a chain…

…

Hanare hadn't slept well. She'd gotten back to the apartment late, after leaving Vanilla Vanilla and then missing her stop on the train. She'd been staring out the window and hadn't even noticed.

When she did sleep, the old nightmare came back. The one where the Jomae trackers finally found her.

This time they'd all had masks covered in sequins. Their senbon were rusty with blood, like they'd killed many times over with them already. In this particular instance, the trackers each wore a red rose tucked into their belts.

It was always the same.

A chase through the valley. She was a child and there was no one to help her. She was backed into a corner, and when she looked up she realized the corner was the tree where a young Kakashi had waved goodbye to her.

At that moment of realization, while she was distracted, the senbon pierced her body. And when she fell to the ground, the pools of blood were the ones from the Konohagakure "honesty room."

The grass would always melt away into sky, the blood became clouds and she would fall through, trying to catch hold of them as she screamed and plummeted through the air.

She always woke up breathless, sure she was seconds away from being crushed on the ground.

It was a stupid dream and didn't make any sense. Hanare was embarrassed that it still frightened her after having it so many times.

Snorting in disgust she tipped her head back to drain the last of the black coffee from her mug. She was sitting on the rail of her balcony. It was 8:15 a.m. and she needed to get ready for work ( _should probably take extra time since I look like hell_ )... but she couldn't stop shaking and tearing up.

" _Hana, please. Hanare, please, listen, let me…"_

The words replayed over and over again in her head. The hand holding the coffee mug trembled. There was no mistaking it. _There could be no other explanation._

"DAMN IT! _How dare you!_ " Hanare flung the mug against the wall of the lanai and it shattered against the stone. Luckily no shards fell down onto her neighbors.

"Um, sorry about that! Hand… slipped…" Hanare called downwards in case anyone on floor 2 was out and about. She sighed and stomped inside to get the broom and dustpan.

Halfway to the kitchen she slowed and then stopped completely. She stood there like a statue, staring at the wall.

 _It's no use._ Tears spilled over from Hanare's eyes. Some of it was grief, about what _he_ had said about her. Some of it was rage, that all this had happened _now_ of all times! And some of it was just sheer frustration and confusion.

Hanare felt faint, so she just sat down on the floor right there, holding her head in her hands. Her long green hair trailed around her in tangles, like the branches of a willow. She took a deep breath and tried to put her mind in order. Mind first, then emotions. That was how she always did it. It never failed her. _Think it through, no matter how much it hurts. Look it right in the face. I won't break. Not now, not ever. I can handle it._

Hanare bit her lip, winced, and cracked open the door of memory. _Look it right in the face, dammit -_

Kenta was Kakashi. Kakashi. Hatake.

"Oh my god," Hanare said aloud. She broke into irrational giggles. Then she teared up again and massaged her temples, head still bowed. "That asshole-!" she stopped herself from going off on another tangential outburst. She also ignored the fact that parts of her that weren't angry actually were kind of percolating with a pink bubbly feeling. Hanare hadn't felt that way in a long time, and wasn't at all sure she ever wanted to again - especially in relation to _him_. She clamped an ice cold mental vise down on the bubbles until they were properly squelched.

 _Now then_. Hanare was 100% certain Kenta had called her by her real name at karaoke. Only Lock and a handful of Leaf would know that name. Kenta wasn't a Lock tracker. Hanare had a keen sense for them and they couldn't hide from her. She'd even impersonated one once. They had a particular smell from a toxin they used to eliminate targets. Kenta didn't smell like that. He smelled like…

Kakashi. Hanare rolled her eyes. It all made sense now - why she constantly had deja vu around him… why his words and gestures seemed so familiar… the strange elevated chakra pulse she'd felt around him. _Maintaining the illusion_. Hanare nodded to herself and steepled her fingers. The disguise was so effective because it was only changing perception in certain areas - his clothes, his hair… the other aspects were left unchanged and added a realness that 99% of ninja would totally buy.

 _If I wasn't trained specifically in espionage, I wouldn't have figured it out_ Hanare mused. She quickly silenced the voice that said _If you weren't so busy trying to NEVER think of Kakashi you would've figured it out earlier!_

The trick to his disguise was that Kakashi simply used his real face. Brilliant, since day to day his real face was always covered. Hanare blushed as she realized she now knew what Kakashi of the Sharingan actually looked like. All she had to do was imagine Kenta with silvery spikey hair instead of the soft brown curls. It wasn't a bad image at all…

"Stop it," Hanare snapped at herself. Her mind went back to the Paradise bar… how he'd kept her from falling, movements too quick for a civilian. And his words… echoes of that day in Konoha, and again when they went outside…

Hanare frowned, remembering the strange incidents of her day shopping with Vega, and all the "accidents" that had started happening at Paradise, shutting down the show… getting her out of work…

Hanare's eyes narrowed. _He wouldn't…_

But a little voice chimed in: _He would!_

"...Would he?" Hanare stood up and went and got the broom. "Why?" she asked the empty room. She went out to the balcony and swept, feeling better after facing the glaring issue of recent events. The weight of unanswered questions still weighed heavily on her, though.

 _What do I do now?_

The city was waking up. Down on the street the donut and peanut guys were setting up their carts. A trio of pigeons swooped rooftop to another. The sky was bizarrely overcast and a cold drizzle, completely at odds with the season, was happening. Strange.

Hanare replayed everything in her mind, starting with meeting a boy with light gray hair out in the valley when she was seven years old and lost.

" _Excuse me," a voice cut through her tears. Hanare looked up, startled and frightened. The valley was huge and no one was around - what if it was a robber or an enemy ninja…?!_

 _She blinked. It was a boy. "Excuse me, I didn't mean to startle you," he said. He was a bit older than her. He had weird grayish hair and one eye covered, like a pirate. Hanare quickly sized him up as she'd been trained and noticed the katana on his back. A shinobi?_

" _Please," he continued, holding up his palms as if to show her they were empty and harmless. "Are you in some kind of trouble? I can help." Hanare regarded him warily. She slowly nodded. He just stared back at her, waiting for her to explain. His one visible eye was shaped rather like the insignia on his headband… leaf-like, dark and intense, slightly tilted down at the outer corner._

" _I… I'm kind of lost," she said, wondering why she would trust a total stranger with this information._

" _Just kind of?" the boy replied, and she thought she saw his mask move a little after he said it. It irritated her, the feeling that he was poking fun. Hanare's tears dried instantly and she glared._

" _You're from the Leaf. What are you doing in the Land of Key?" she demanded. The boy looked surprised. He reached back and scratched his head. Then he crossed his arms in front of his chest like he was a grown up. He lifted his chin a bit and looked down at her._

" _Reconnaissance," he said importantly._

" _I'll tell my village that," she said firmly. The boy's eye slid to the side like he was thinking. Hanare decided she would continue trying to find Grandpa Lock. She took a step and winced. "Ouch," she hissed. It must be a blister. She sat down on the ground and took off her shoe. Indeed, there was a large raw red patch on her heel._

 _The boy was watching her. "That doesn't look good," he said, kneeling down. "Here. I have a med kit my friend made me." He took out a neat little box and opened it. Hanare peered into it curiously. Bandages and tiny bottles and tweezers and thread and swabs and stuff._

" _Give me your foot," the boy said. Hanare hesitated. She felt embarrassed but did it anyway, thrusting her foot at him. He took it gently in one hand. "This will sting." He was holding up a cotton ball with something on it._

" _I have a high pain tolerance," Hanare said proudly. It was the compliment she most often got from her teachers. The boy dabbed the cotton onto the blister. Hanare bit her lip and only jerked her knee a little. She wanted to prove what she'd said was true._

" _You're tough," the boy nodded. Hanare blushed._

" _You're good at this," Hanare said as the boy wrapped a bandage around her foot, and he blushed. She had to look closely to see it over the edge of the mask that covered half his face._

" _Why do you wear that?" Hanare asked. "Are you sick?"_

" _Wear what," the boy said, concentrating on smoothing the bandage._

" _That mask."_

 _The boy didn't answer right away, and only then did Hanare realize she might've been rude. Finally he said, "I have a beauty mark by my mouth."_

 _Hanare frowned. "I have one by my eye."_

" _Maybe you should cover your eye," the boy said, standing up and putting away the med kit._

" _Then I'd look just like you, but opposite," Hanare said._

" _Don't be ridiculous," the boy said. Hanare stuck her tongue out at him. The boy sighed. "You're hurt. Where do you live? I'll take you home."_

" _I think it's… that way?" Hanare pointed. The boy looked._

" _Okay. You know, you really shouldn't wander around if you don't know where you are." He held out his hand to help her up. Hanare took it. His hand was larger than hers and her palm fit nicely in his. He pulled her to her feet. "Get on my back," he ordered._

 _Hanare looked at him. He shrugged. "Would you rather walk on that blister?"_

 _She shook her head and he knelt. She climbed on easily, hesitating before she wrapped her arms around his neck. He smelled like soap and stuff. She'd never hugged another person before. Grandpa Lock and the teachers didn't allow it._

" _Not so tight. You're choking me," the boy said as he stood up and hooked his arms around her knees._

" _Well, you just touched my butt," Hanare said. The boy stiffened._

" _S-sorry…" he said. Hanare settled her head on his shoulder._

" _It's okay. You didn't mean too, right?"_

" _No!" the boy sounded horrified._

" _Then let's go."_

 _He carried her a long way, pointing at the clouds when she got discouraged and tired… Yet he never complained about being tired himself... though he was the one doing the work of walking, and talking, and supporting her…_

Hanare remembered it like it was yesterday. The memories never seemed to fade like everything else did. She recalled every word, every beat, each gesture of his hand and tilt of his head. And some of that clarity was her training, but most of it was something else entirely.

 _He waved good-bye beneath the tree. I knew I wouldn't see him again. I only had a little kid's words at my disposal, so I did nothing. What could I say? Grandpa Lock would've taken me back to the compound regardless. I didn't even know Kakashi's name… I only knew that I wanted to be at that boy's side. That we hadn't had enough time. That he was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen..._

It had been years until Hanare had been old enough to take on missions, to start hearing rumors. A shinobi from the Land of Fire with silver hair and one red eye. Always masked, always with one eye obscured.

 _That has to be him._ Teenage Hanare had hoarded snippets of incidental information about the "Copy Ninja" as if they were gold and jewels. Any mission outside of Key she embraced with zeal as there was better chance of hearing good "man who copied 1,000 jutsus" gossip. _One day. One day I will be assigned to the Land of Fire and our paths will cross again._ She could feel it, knew it to be true, as sure as she knew the war was not the last war the world would suffer.

And when it happened, there he was. Colder, at first, and worn… and he certainly didn't remember everything - all their pitifully fleeting history - like she did. But it was okay. He remembered enough.

" _So that's it…"_

This time, Hanare waved good-bye and Kakashi had no words. The disappointment was a knife through her gut. A wound that never fully healed.

 _But, at least… I gained a few new memories._ Kakashi catching her people-watching in Konoha, smiling down at her with that "lazy" look. Kakashi bested by a daisy bouquet and his nosy students. Kakashi looking up at the clouds. Kakashi uncuffing her hands in the honesty room…

Kakashi's lips, through the mask.

 _When I saw him as Kenta, for the first time… the tree, then the cliff flashed through my mind. But I was so certain he'd given up on me… Kakashi let me go. He never tried to find me after. There was nothing left for me to hope for._

Hanare dumped the shattered pieces of coffee mug into the wastebasket. She put the broom and dustpan away.

" _Don't you do this for all your clients?"_

The words were barbed and ugly, so unlike the Kakashi that lived in her memories. But honestly, she didn't know him very well. She had no idea why he would be in the city, at a strip club, following her around in a disguise. _Maybe it's related to a mission?_ Hanare grimaced. She didn't know enough to unravel it, and she didn't want to. Kakashi had rejected her, deceived her, embarrassed her and ultimately insulted her.

 _I loved an idea of Kakashi Hatake for years. I have no idea who he really is._ Hanare turned to walk into the bathroom. She had to get ready for work.

 _Maybe it's not him that did me wrong… maybe I did it to myself, harboring these feelings all this time, based on memories of a childish, childhood encounter…_

Hanare looked at the clock. Barely enough time to get to Paradise.

 _I'll wrap this Vega mission. Then I'll delete Kakashi from my brain. Tonight._


	13. Chapter 13

The breakfast buffet was completely nauseating to Kakashi and so he simply sat, staring sullenly at his untouched Earl Gray tea. Guy had insisted on dumping spoonfuls of honey in it ("It's good for you, Kakashi!") despite Kakashi's protests that he didn't like honey.

Asuma had been to the waffle station at least three times and now Guy was coming back with a plate laden down with a small mountain of sausage links and bacon. Kakashi felt his stomach waver and looked away from the greasy food with a shudder.

"The most important meal of the day," Guy said with relish, rubbing his hands together as he sat. "A youthful shinobi must fuel his fire, know what I mean?" He waggled an inch-thick brow at Asuma and Kakashi. Kakashi did, in fact, know what Guy meant and it only made him feel more nauseous.

"So what happened with Hanabae," Asuma drawled, popping a strawberry into his mouth. Kakashi wanted to punch him across the room, right into the juice machine. That'd shut him up and fix his sweet tooth at the same time.

"Nothing," Kakashi replied evenly.

"Then what happened to all our money. You go gambling?" Asuma asked it casually but Kakashi knew he was still irritated by having to share their winnings.

"We went to dinner," Kakashi grunted.

"You and Hana?" Asuma dipped a strawberry in whipped cream. Kakashi bristled. He didn't like other people calling her by that-

"Yuki too?!" Guy was looking at him with huge soulful eyes. _Crap_ , Kakashi thought. The last thing he wanted was a Guy soap opera scene in the middle of the hotel restaurant.

"Yuki said you two were so drunk she had to send you home in a cab!" Kakashi snapped.

Guy and Asuma looked at each other.

"We may have had a few… bowls…" Asuma mumbled.

"...of drinks," Guy finished sheepishly.

Kakashi gave them both a patronizing look before he continued. "Yuki came along, but so did all the other dancers. It wasn't… intimate, if that's what you're-"

"Hold up," Asuma cut in. He leaned toward Kakashi with a jealous glare. "Did you say _all_ the strippers?!"

Kakashi nodded.

"Dammit Kakashi!" Asuma slapped the table. "You use _my_ cash to go play big shot with like _a dozen_ girls and you can't even _try_ to call us in on the action?! You selfish sonofabitch." Asuma sat back and crossed his arms.

"I didn't plan it that way," Kakashi shrugged, secretly enjoying Asuma's pain.

"You took Yuki out without me…" Guy's voice trembled.

"No no no, Guy - I would never! Look, she came along because she keeps an eye on Hana, I'm sure that was it…" Kakashi preemptively thrust a napkin in Guy's face.

"Just calm down," Kakashi held up his hands placatingly. "It was a group thing. An... incident happened at the club, the fire alarm. Were you two still inside?"

Guy shook his head. Asuma shrugged. "Nah maybe we were already in the taxi."

"Well the alarm went off. I offered to take Hana out, but all her friends were there. So I invited them too. It just seemed polite." Kakashi glared at Guy, who was dabbing his eyes. "Anyway the girls needed clothes since their stuff was stuck in the club. So we went shopping. Then ramen. Then more shopping. Then… _karaoke_."

Kakashi had gotten more worked up as he talked and he said "karaoke" with such venomous disgust that Guy and Asuma exchanged glances. The Copy Ninja had absently picked up a butter knife and was twirling it in his fingers with a wild look in his right eye.

"That's it! That was the entire night! Like I said earlier, _nothing_ happened. Nothing! Except for _me_ ruining _everything_." Kakashi stabbed the knife down into a poppyseed roll. The knife stayed vertical, having pierced the table itself from the force of the blow. Guy and Asuma were silent. They looked at the knife. They looked at Kakashi. Asuma took a sip of coffee. Guy started to eat the roll from around the knife.

"Well guess that's that, then," Asuma said. He glanced pityingly at Kakashi. "Sorry, Kash. Sounds rough. Better luck next time, eh?" Asuma patted his shoulder reassuringly, then started finishing off the food on his plate. Guy had finally composed himself and was mumbling about maybe leaving a letter at the concierge to be delivered to Yuki at work.

Kakashi looked blankly at his reflection in the knife stuck in the table. The thin silver blade showed but a sliver of his face, tired and insubstantial. He looked as gray and dismal as the weather. A vision of Sakumo flashed through his mind. Another gray man, alone, a cloud drifting past until it faded away completely…

" _Why do you wear that?"_

" _...I have a beauty mark…"_

" _Well, I do too!"_

 _She was very bright. Her hair and her clothes. Lots of colors. Just a little kid, crying. Obviously lost. Where were her parents? I'd never seen hair that color before._

 _I didn't remember right away. Not till she said something. Not until I copied her jutsu and looked into my own mind. I was surprised to find that memory there… why hadn't I seen it before? What else is suppressed in this head of mine? I released the jutsu before I could find out. I don't want to find out…_

" _Wo-o-o-w…"_

" _That woman, she's so beautiful!"_

 _I tracked her with my gaze, she turned to look at me. Do I know her?! Why does she seem familiar? Beautiful, yes, the kids are right… I must be mistaken - I don't know any women like that…_

" _But I'm not in the intel division."_

" _But you have the Sharingan. Maybe you'll be able to find out more about her."_

 _They left a rope burn on her ankle. I'll bandage it before we go out… Damn I hate this torture room. Deja vu? Why am I feeling this way… she does seem familiar. Perhaps... when I was young…?_

 _I've never walked these streets with a girl, how strange. People will talk… that's alright. Hm. She smells like vanilla and those flowers down by the river..._

" _You gave me hope when things were darkest."_

" _Please. I want you to believe me -"_

" _Hanare I -"_

 _I'm a cloud, drifting alone until I return to the atmosphere. I lied to her about the mask. I wear it to look cool. I'm not cool. I lied about not letting her go. I let her go. I lied to her about being Kenta. I don't have any money. I don't make movies. I lied. I let her go. I had to. Look at the clouds, I said. Why? So she might remember me? I'm one of them. I'm just a drifting cloud. I'm falling apart. I wonder, dad, is this how you felt…_

" _Kakashi! That Jomae Valley recon took much longer than I expected - what happened?"_

" _I'm sorry, Captain - a pretty girl stopped me. So I danced."_

" _Kakashi! So brilliant and mature and then these things remind me you're still just a boy! Don't be a smartass."_

"Kakashi." Guy's voice was sharper and more serious than usual.

"Huh?" Kakashi looked up sleepily.

"He's losing it," Asuma murmured. "Let's get him home, Guy."

Guy nodded, concern etched all over his face. "You just completely tuned us out there for awhile, my Eternal Rival…"

Kakashi blinked. The clock above the omelette station had said 10:10 before. Now it was 10:19. Had he really been not answering them for that long?

"Tsunade sent a message this morning," Asuma informed him. "We need to get back."

Kakashi jerked his head up. "Wait - what?"

"Duty calls," Asuma chuckled. "Vacay's over. Besides, it's Monday. City's gonna be a lot more tame than on the weekend so we wouldn't be missing much anyway."

"We're… we're leaving," Kakashi frowned.

"We can try our youthful luck on your next birthday, Kakashi! After all, we've barely scratched the surface of your Bucket List," Guy snickered evilly.

Kakashi blinked. He flexed his hand. He touched his forehead where his hitae-ate would normally be. _A leaf. A charm on a chain…_

A huge sapphire. Which was she wearing, right now?

Asuma finished his coffee. "Let's go big guy," he said, standing up and clapping Kakashi on the shoulder. Guy started to get up.

"No," Kakashi said.

"What," Asuma grimaced. "What now."

Guy hesitated. "Lady Hokage did give us orders, Kakashi - we really should…"

"I can't," Kakashi grabbed a napkin and the pen from the receipt tray. He started drawing a diagram.

"Is… is that the club?" Asuma asked, peering over his shoulder, exasperated. "Wanna tell us what's going on, Kash?"

"I can't leave," Kakashi said.

"Why can't you, Kakashi?" Guy scratched his head.

Kakashi made some notes on the napkin next to the diagram.

"Because," he said. "A pretty girl needs me to dance."


	14. Chapter 14

The lights were going down. Rei sat in her dressing room doing her preparatory routine. Yuki popped in.

"Any sign of them?" Rei asked icily.

"No, Rei. Maybe they really did have to go home." Yuki sighed.

"Good," Rei said with a joyless smile.

"...Right," Yuki said. So far the day had gone normally. She'd been worried about Rei's state of mind after her fight with Kenta and the disappointing end to the night, but Rei was playing it cool. They'd met up for brunch crepes, done some light shopping, and her green-haired friend seemed mostly herself. She got a little morose when a cashier complimented her necklace, but that was it.

They'd arrived together at work, and Mr. Vega had immediately found them. He had a huge bouquet of flowers for Rei and promised her she'd only have to do one song and then he was taking her out for dinner at Maison de Plage.

Rei was touching up her lipstick. She had on the Black Widow costume, which meant she was in a worse mood than she was letting on.

"You look nice with red hair, Rei," Yuki smiled. "I've always liked that wig!"

"Thanks," Rei said softly, distracted. She wasn't sure why she'd chosen this one today. Wouldn't it have made more sense to do something that highlighted her natural hair color, if she was moving in for the kill with Vega?

"What. Ever," Rei threw her lipstick in the tray. Yuki looked at her worriedly.

The buzzer on the dressing counter went off. "Good. Let's get it over with," Rei said as she got up and headed toward the stage.

"Break a leg!" Yuki called cheerfully. Rei flashed a peace sign in acknowledgement and then she was gone. Yuki turned and slipped through the curtain. She had a lot to do.

…

" _Guy. Can you hear me?"_

"Loud and clear, Kakashi," Guy flashed a megawatt smile that no one saw, since he was wriggling through a ventilation shaft.

" _Are you in position?"_

"Just a few more feet," Guy replied. His jumpsuit slid easily over the aluminum. He was almost there.

"Ok, Kakashi!"

" _Great. Wait for my cue."_

"Roger." Guy peered down through the air vent into the Paradise vault and records room. He was to dig into the club's tax documents and assets and look for evidence of ties to a particular notorious international organization. He settled down to wait, thinking of Yuki's assets instead of the mission. "All work and no play..." Guy murmured contentedly.

Asuma was staked out by the management offices, dressed as a busser. He swore under his breath. "Can't believe Hatake conned me into working during a vacation."

After Kakashi had refused to leave for Konoha at brunch, an ugly argument had ensued back in their hotel room.

"I love ya, Kash, but you're the biggest whiner, I swear! A big, famous, spoiled overgrown baby." Asuma had yelled through the bathroom door. Kakashi was in the shower. Guy was trying to figure out how to deescalate the situation.

"Asuma, let's give him some space. I think he's just in a really fragile place right now…" Guy offered.

"Fragile? Hell, my old man just died! _I'm_ fragile! It's always Kakashi, Kakashi, Kakashi! You protect him, Guy. He's a grown-ass man - don't ask me to pussyfoot around his bitch troubles or whatever else like everyone else does!" Asuma pounded on the bathroom door.

"Get out here, Hatake! We're going back to the village," Asuma shouted.

Guy winced. "Asuma, really, I think -"

"We have orders! Mr. Sharingan in there isn't thinking straight. You think I want Tsunade all over _my_ ass because the Scarecrow wouldn't get it together?!"

"Tsunade can come down hard…" Guy admitted.

"None of us have great love lives. I get it," Asuma growled. "But duty comes first. He's acting like a rotten adolescent brat. I get it - he likes her. But hell, I brought him out here for his birthday - I'm away from Kurenai. See me having a breakdown? No." Asuma pulled out a cigarette.

"Er…" Guy scratched his head. "You do seem a bit stressed out -"

"Because of _him!"_ Asuma snarled at the bathroom. "My whole weekend blown. And he's found a way to turn a holiday into a torture session. And now the insubordination. Tsunade's gonna be pissed."

At that moment Kakashi emerged from the bathroom in a cloud of steam. He was still dripping wet and had just a towel on, wrapped around his waist.

"Did I hear you call Hanare a bitch?" he asked Asuma mildly, eye glinting.

"I said you have _bitch troubles in general,"_ Asuma tossed off. "Nothing against Hana in particular. _You're_ the problem."

"Don't call her Hana," Kakashi said.

"She is hella fine," Asuma said, lighting up. "Not even my type and I'll admit that. That dance she gave me - whew! Lucky for me you cut it off when you did, Kash." Asuma winked. Kakashi looked at him. Guy wrung his hands.

"Kurenai enjoys having a foot massage before intercourse," Kakashi said in a bored monotone as he walked past Asuma toward the suitcases.

"Yeah I'll bet she does… damn, she has cute feet…" Asuma sighed around his cigarette. Then he frowned. He turned slowly toward Kakashi. "Wait. What did you just say…"

Guy leaped between them. "Now, now, I think -" he raised a fist in the air. "It's a good time for one last visit to the chocolate fondue fount-"

Guy was flung to the side as Asuma raged toward the towel-clad Kakashi. "What did you just say?!" the Sarutobi roared.

Kakashi turned his head slightly, just enough so Asuna could see a slit of Sharingan. "She also likes to take a nap after. Kurenai, I mean. After. Sex." His voice was lilting and soft. Guy groaned. Usually Kakashi reserved that tone for mocking students and enemies…

"I'LL MURDER YOU YOU SKINNY LITTLE SHIT!" Asuma drew his chakra daggers. Kakashi's eye flared open. Guy picked up the phone and frantically dialed the front desk.

 _Clang, skree, clang!_ The sound of daggers and kunai almost drowned Guy out. "Hello?!" he yelled into the phone.

"Ah - yes… sir? Front desk. Marcel speaking. How may I assist you today?"

Guy ducked as a shuriken whizzed past. It thudded deep into the wall where his head had just been.

"Yes, Marcel, I need room service. Right away. As in _NOW._ Can you send up food?" _Crash._ A bedside lamp met its end as Kakashi parried one of Asuma's devastating kicks. Guy cringed.

"What would you like, sir?"

"Ah… what's quick?"

"Cereal and yogurt?"

"Yes! Cereal! Yogurt! 50 orders please. Of each! Can the maids be here in three minutes? Yes? Great!" Guy shouted into the phone.

Dropping the receiver, Guy rolled to safety just as Asuma tackled Kakashi onto the bed.

"You fucking dog!" Asuma shouted, fists pummeling the mattress as Kakashi dodged and blocked with his forearms, waiting for a chance to slip out from under Asuma's vicious attack..

"Aren't… you… overreacting…" Kakashi panted, grabbing a wrist and twisting to the side.

Asuma predicted the move and used the opportunity to pass Kakashi's guard. Asuma had the weight advantage _and_ was more versed in jiu jitsu.

But Kakashi wasn't a schmuck at grappling, either. He bucked his hips to throw Asuma off balance and raised an elbow to smash the smug, tanned, bad-boy face.

Asuma was surprised at Kakashi's raw power but avoided the elbow and rolled to the side, springing up like a panther ready for the next exchange.

A little distance meant Kakashi could throw some signs and did, unleashing in Asuma's direction.

"Mud Wall!" A crest of sludge rose around Asuma, who swore and jumped straight up. Kakashi had hoped to immobilize Asuma _in_ the wall, but the ex-Guardian did an aerial flip and pushed off the ceiling with one foot, redirecting himself straight at Kakashi. Asuma knew close quarters favored him and he didn't give a single fuck if Kakashi was stark naked as long as he got to beat his ass…

Kakashi smirked. Asuma was coming in with his usual brute force and that meant it would be easy to turn the tables here and humiliate him…

 _Knock. Knock._

"OH LOOK _,"_ Guy screeched. " _Someone's_ at the _DOOR_ … I _WONDER_ who that could be!" He hoped desperately that would get his riled companions' attention and raced to the door of the hotel room.

 _Crash. Crack. Krrrrrrroooosh…_

Guy ignored the sounds behind him and flung open the door. Tears of relief flooded his eyes at the sight that greeted him: five hotel maids carrying trays and pushing carts laden with cereal and yogurt smiled at him from the hall. Their pristine, crisp uniforms were demure and pale blue with bright white aprons trimmed in ruffles.

"Room service?" said the lead girl with a polite bob.

 _SLAM. Crack!_ Guy cringed and nodded.

He turned back to the flurry in the room. "CIVILIANS!" he yelled at the top of his lungs.

Suddenly all the noise and fighting stopped. Guy stood aside and held the door open politely for the maids, who trotted in like the veterans of hospitality they were - as if they'd seen the end of the world and more and it couldn't faze them much less put a smudge on their silverware.

"Pardon us, kind sirs." The lead maid carefully led the way around broken glass and dishevelled bedding and… mud? And directed the other girls to clear the table and start unloading cereal and yogurt.

Asuma stood panting by the sliding door. He ran a hand through his hair and straightened his uniform. He lit a new cigarette. When a maid passed near him he nodded courteously.

Kakashi was sitting on the end of one of the beds. When he'd seen that it was maids entering the room he'd grabbed a pillow and hastily covered his lap. Now he had his head propped on one hand looking bored, as if sitting nude in the middle of an annihilated hotel room was a completely normal, mundane thing.

A couple of the maids took discreet sidelong glanes at Kakashi's unclothed torso, but Guy noticed it was Kakashi doing most of the blushing.

Asuma tried to start a conversation with the lead maid but she stuck with professionally cordial replies of few words.

It took a long time to unload the yogurt and cereal. All the shinobi could do was be quiet and wait. Guy mopped his forehead with the back of his arm.

Finally it was done. "Enjoy!" the lead maid bid them, with a graceful wave and perky smile. All the girls filed out in orderly fashion. A small pyramid of yogurt containers and various types of mini cereal boxes had been constructed on the table. Bowls and utensils and milk and berries and honey had been set out in cute arrangements.

Guy planted himself between his two friends, arms crossed and green spandex-clad legs in a wide stance.

"Really," he glowered. "Enough is enough."

Asuma puffed stoically, staring out through the glass of the sliding door.

Kakashi leaned back on one arm and scratched his head, looking away sheepishly.

Finally Asuma spoke.

"When'd it happen, Kash." His voice was a soft growl.

"The envoy mission to Hot Water four years ago."

"I knew it!" Asuma slammed his fist into his other palm as he turned swiftly to glare at the copy ninja.

"As I recall, you weren't interested in Kurenai back then," Kakashi said carefully. "I believe it was Anko whom you -"

"That's not the point!" Asuma said. Kakashi let it go. Asuma rubbed his goatee. "So," he said after a minute, "After Hot Water, then what?"

"What do you mean?" Kakashi was genuinely puzzled. Realizing he was still undressed, he reached out and wrapped the sheet around himself.

"Don't play dumb. What happened with you two after," Asuma said threateningly.

Kakashi looked surprised. "Nothing."

"Nothing?" Asuma's eyebrows raised and his cigarette dangled skeptically from his lips. Even Guy was curious.

"Nothing," Kakashi repeated. "It was a one-time thing. I guess… I guess we just weren't suited for one another."

"Hmph. Probably because you have a pencil dick and she wasn't satisfied," Asuma muttered. Guy raised a warning hand.

"Feel free to ask Kurenai," Kakashi answered coldly. "I'm pretty sure her _satisfaction_ wasn't the issue."

Asuma eyed his silver-haired friend. "Nah I'm good. It's all in the past anyway." He ground out his smoke in the ashtray and stretched. "I'm going out on the balcony."

"To do what?" Guy said.

"Smoke some more," Asuma laughed.

"What about Konoha," Guy said seriously.

"I'm still not going," Kakashi said

"C'mon man!" Asuma was exasperated.

"I've never asked this damn village for anything my entire life," Kakashi said, anger lacing his words. "I'm asking for this. You tell Lady Tsunade we need to stay." His eye burned into Asuma's.

"On what excuse," Asuma grunted.

"That we ran into an extremely dangerous bingo book personality who's involved with some kind of conspiracy that could affect all five great nations," Kakashi said without hesitation.

Guy raised his ample brows.

Asuma rolled his eyes. "That's a helluva description for Hanare's butt," he chuckled.

Kakashi flung the pillow that had been covering his crotch right at Asuma's face. Asuma dodged and waved as he stepped through the sliding door.

"Fine, Kash. I'll tell Aunty Tsunade your story. Right after I kill a little more lung tissue." The door slid shut and _clicked_ behind him.

"A vacation mission!" Guy said. "I like it! Nothing more youthful than being totally spontaneous about working in an official capacity." He flashed a grin and thumbs-up at Kakashi, who had no idea what he meant.

Asuma had called Tsunade and the Hokage had agreed on an extension. That had been five hours ago.

Now, after extensive research on the hotel's business center computers, some heated debriefing and debate, a hastily written mission plan and a snack at a taco cart, they were all at _Pink Paradise_ and ready to do what they did best…

Ninjathings.


	15. Chapter 15

The curtain opened. A dancer with scarlet hair… wearing a tight black leather catsuit… swung down from a trapeze in a graceful series of flips set to classical Russian music. Then she pulled out two guns from her belt and fired them mercilessly out toward the audience.

Some gasped but they'd been warned, and the guns only contained pellets of glitter and confetti. Sparkle bombs rained down and there was applause.

Kakashi crouched in the rafters of the performance hall, watching Hanare's act with newfound pride. He'd been anxious before, watching her, but this feeling was more akin to seeing his students at the chunin exams or something… he could appreciate her work. And since somehow they were connected ( _my home… a village in the Land of Fire…_ didn't that mean she had to have some feelings left for him? The revelation had come at the taco carts. Kakashi hoped his hunch was right)... he felt pride in her skill and beauty, and respect for what she did - contrary to what his horrible words at karaoke had implied. She was a wonderful performer, and she had every right to do what she wanted with her life.

Kakashi was still going to shut the show down. As much as he wanted to keep watching Hana - at the moment she was performing a series of intense, erotic stretches - his ninja way (or something) just did not allow him to stand by. Hanare finished the slow movements and the music got more upbeat, which was Kakashi's cue. He glanced down, making sure Vega and the other three VIPs - the pugilist, kickboxer, and man in the red beret - were still seated in the front section.

Kakashi unsnapped a pocket and slid out a scroll. It happened to be one Shino had helped him create.

…

"Unbelievable." Hanare stormed into the dressing room and threw her air guns on the counter. Even backstage, screams from the theater could be heard.

"How would so many roaches get into the club at once?" Leilani wondered, walking behind Rei to her locker. "This place, I tell ya… it's really gone downhill." The tall tanned dancer sauntered off.

Hanare glared into the mirror at her own reflection. _How indeed!_ She tapped her manicured nails - done in a nice nude polish to go with the Black Widow outfit - on the dressing counter's composite surface. _Kakashi… what are you up to now?_ Hanare gritted her teeth.

A slamming door that shook the walls with its force told her that Vega had arrived. Hanare turned in the direction of his footsteps, bracing her arms on the counter and leaning back so her half-unzipped catsuit and partially exposed bosom would be the first things Vega saw.

He rounded the corner and stopped. "Boss," she said, smirking. His eyes raked her up and down but it was obvious he was in a foul mood. "Get dressed for dinner," he said sharply. "And take off that hideous wig. I'll meet you at the car." He walked away viciously stabbing his cell phone with one long finger.

Hanare watched him go. He was wearing a light gray suit really showed off his ass. "Um… Rei?" a gentle voice broke into Hanare's thoughts.

"Yeah, Yuki?" She turned to see her hostess friend peeking through the curtain.

"Are you still going to dinner with Mr. Vega?" Yuki look concerned.

"Yeah," Hanare answered tiredly.

"Take care of yourself," Yuki said.

"I will. I know what I'm doing." She flashed a grin at her buxom best buddy. "Don't worry." With a swift move of her hand and a flick of her wrist, Hanare sent a hairpin flying through the air. It lodged right between Yuki's breasts.

"Rei!" Yuki giggled. "You promised to tell me…"

"In another life, I was a really cool ninja!" Hanare unzipped her catsuit and winked.

Yuki looked at her. Then she laughed. "That's ridiculous, Rei! Your worst fib yet!"

"I know," Hanare laughed. She kicked the catsuit aside and went to her locker. She pulled out a black velvet dress with gold embroidery and a mandarin collar. It would have been demure but for the cutout design on the chest that swept dangerously low, and a high slit on one side of the skirt.

"Oh, it's like Old Hollywood with a little Chinese Empress," Yuki smiled. Hanare nodded, slipping it on. She pulled off her wig and unpinned her hair. It fell in green ringlets around her shoulders and down her back. She finger-combed it a bit then shrugged and reached for her shoes.

"Will I see you later?" Yuki asked.

Hanare pulled on the platform peep-toe stilettos. They were gold to match the embroidery of the dress, and had capsules of sleeping potion, explosives, and corrosive acid, respectively, in each of three large rhinestones that ran down the heels of the shoes.

"I'll be out late," Hanare said. "Brunch tomorrow?"

Yuki smiled at her, but seemed a bit sad. "Sure, Rei. Brunch." Hanare looked at her friend a moment longer, then waved and walked away.

…

" _Kakashi."_

"Asuma, what is it?"

" _I got a load of stuff outta that Vega guy's office. You would not believe-"_

"Great. Document everything. They're leaving for the restaurant, I've got to go."

" _Go on, Kash."_

"Asuma… thanks."

The headset went quiet again. Below him people were still leaving the club hurriedly due to the insect infestation. Kakashi leapt swiftly from rafter to rafter and out of an old landing, pausing on the balcony. "Shadow Clone Jutsu!" he said, a perfect second Kakashi appearing next to him. "Go on ahead to Maison de Plage. You know what to do," he told the clone. The clone nodded and vanished into the night.

Kakashi glanced down. He saw Vega's Maserati still in the parking lot so he knew he'd gotten out ahead of them. He jumped down onto the car and slid underneath. A few seconds later the Copy Ninja emerged. A _poof_ and he disappeared from sight just as the back door to _Pink Paradise_ swung open. Vega and Hanare emerged, hand in hand.

"This night can't get any worse," Vega said. "Which means it can only get better!" He flashed a charming grin at Hanare. She gave a wan smile in return.

They got in his sportscar. Vega tried the engine. Nothing. "What the-!" he cursed, trying again. Hanare sighed. _He jinxed himself_ she thought, staring out the window. Suddenly a limo pulled up next to them. Vega glared at it. The window of the limo rolled down, revealing a driver with dark glasses and blond hair combed slickly down over one eye.

"Sir? A mister Dante called our limo service. He said he saw some thugs messing with your car earlier, and thought you might need a ride. He said he already reported the incident to police."

Vega snorted. "Unusual for _Dante_ to do anything so proactive," he hissed. "But, fine. Glad he had an inkling of foresight today. Let's go, Rei."

Hanare got out obediently. The limo driver had the door open for her already. "Thank you," she said, sliding in. Vega got in the other side.

"Maison de Plage," Vega barked at the driver. Hanare rolled her eyes. The driver seemed well-built and polite. _Too bad I'm not out with him_ , she thought sullenly. Vega was fixing drinks from the limo's minibar. He'd seemed so handsome to her at one point… but now his features just seemed too angular and cruel… his clothes and everything about him was just so narcissistic.

An image of a baggy brown sweater flashed into her mind. Hanare scowled. "I'll take one of those," she said, leaning over and snatching a glass before Vega had even finished pouring.

...

"Oh! This is divine," Hanare chewed on a mouthful of lobster, concentrating on stuffing herself silly and not on the night's work ahead.

"Glad you're… enjoying it," Vega eyed Rei with a forced smile. Who knew such a slip of a girl could eat so damn much?! The meal was costing him much more than he'd planned… and he'd already bought her that damned necklace. His cerulean gaze fell to her neck. _Well at least after I screw her and dump her I can resell the sapphire at a decent - wait, that's not the…_ Vega's eyes narrowed.

"Rei. You're not wearing the sapphire I bought you." Vega's voice was icy. Hanare stopped chewing, her mouth full of wagyu t-bone. Her fingers fumbled at her collar.

"I'm not?" she said, swallowing beef. "I was sure I put it on for tonight. I took it off yesterday to make sure I didn't lose it…" Hanare's fingers froze as she touched the chain at her neck. She suddenly realized her error.

"Who gave you that?" Vega said, sipping his pinot with dangerous calm. Hanare's fingers closed protectively around the leaf charm.

"It was my mother's," she said sadly. "Today was her birthday… b-but she passed a few years ago and…" Hanare let her eyes fill with a rush of tears. Vega's eyebrows shot up in alarm. Jealousy forgotten, he handed Rei a napkin.

"Now, now, Rei… this is a very nice restaurant… we don't want to cause a, ah, scene - I'm very sorry for your loss, I mean, darling…"

Rei's breaths were coming raggedly. "Mommy!" she squeaked. Vega reached out across the table desperately.

"Now Rei, darling, everyone must go at their time, bless your mother's soul - please, _please calm_ down, just a little deep breath…!" Vega winced and put one hand to his ear preemptively as Rei's mouth opened in what was sure to be a huge sobbing catastro-

"Was the steak not done to the lady's liking?" Vega and Rei both looked up, surprised. Their waiter stood there, full of professional concern. _Funny, I didn't hear him approach…_ Vega thought, but shrugged it off. Anything or anyone that stopped one of Rei's bouts of histrionics could have his gratitude…

"Oh, no! The steak is perfect," Rei assured him. "I'm sorry, I just became emotional for a moment - a personal matter." She dabbed her eyes on a napkin and gave a small smile to the waiter. His green eyes peeked out from beneath raven side-swept bangs. _What a perceptive sort… too bad I'm not out with him..._ Hanare sighed inwardly. _Ah well. I am 'at work' right now anyway. Ugh, can't believe my rookie move with the necklace…_

The waiter handed her a fresh napkin. "Let me know if you need _anything_ , anything at all," he smiled warmly. Hanare nodded. The waiter respectfully refilled Vega's wine glass, and then they were alone again.

"Do you think you'll have room for dessert?" Vega asked.

"Oh yes!" Rei chirped, putting beef and lobster in her mouth at the same time. "At least two or three of them!" she declared as she chewed. Vega stared sullenly at his wine before raising it to his lips and taking a long, long drink.

…

" _Kakashi."_

"Yeah, Guy. Go ahead."

" _Found what you were looking for in the financials. Gonna head back to base."_

"Excellent. Keep an eye on Paradise and the three other VIPs. Don't engage - you make sure Asuma doesn't, either! I'm tailing Hanare right now - looks like they're headed to Canal Towers. I might be off the radio awhile…"

" _Kakashi - be careful."_

"Thanks, Guy."


	16. Chapter 16

Hanare arched her back and _ssss'd_ through her clenched teeth. Her legs twitched from the sting of the switch, but she couldn't move her ankles.

"You look much better this way, Rei," Vega said, whipping her again. Hanare flinched but said nothing. As encounters went… well, so far things were pretty tame. Sure, she was upside-down with her wrists shackled to the floor and her ass in the air, but honestly what was new.

"Please," she begged, while thinking of the lemon meringue they'd had for dessert. "Please, sir…" Vega hit her again and she squealed on cue. Vega chuckled. He really was a pretentious narcissist of a prick, and she couldn't wait to be done with him. Hus condo took up the entire top floor of the tower, and a huge portion of it was devoted to this "sex dungeon."

Vega walked over to her and unchained her hands and feet from the floor, but kept the cuffs on so he could drag her across the room to the bed. It was covered in black silk sheets and there mirrors on every side and above, too. Hanare gasped as Vega threw her naked body onto the soft mattress. He was wearing a mask that reminded her of… tracker ninja? Hanare's heart skipped a bit and she felt an irrational thud of fear in her gut.

 _Stop it. That's just a childish nightmare. It's a coincidence._ She looked up helplessly at him, quivering and being submissive. Vega had a weapon, a triple-bladed claw, that he brandished at her. Hanare was ready. She still had her shoes on, for the kink, and if he did try anything she would deploy acid from a heel right into his face.

"Beg me not to fuck you," Vega said.

So Hanare started to beg.

 _Can we just do it already so I can get an afterglow confession out of you or just drug you while you're asleep and search your apartment for what I need… C'mon Hanare, you're not doing your best work here_ she chided herself.

"PLEASE, please stop - sir, I'll do anything - please don't-" Vega towered over her, removing his mask to reveal his sculpted, smirking face that matched his sculpted, smirking abs and everything else cover-model perfect and repulsive about him. He took off the claw and reached down to unzip his impossibly tight pants.

"Noooo, I beg you-" Hanare began, curious to see what her boss was packing, despite being more than done with this mission.

"You're going to need a few days off from dancing after this," Vega cackled. "Open wide, Rei!"

"Please, stop-"

The floor beneath Vega exploded upward. A disembodied hand shot through the mattress and straight to the assassin's throat… No, not just a hand-

"Kakashi!" Hanare screamed in outrage. _Headhunter Jutsu! Damn him_ -

The silver-haired ninja had a death grip on Vega and a follow-up kunai in his hand already whizzing through the air toward his heart. But Kakashi had underestimated the assassin's flexibility - Vega, seeming to propel himself on nothing but air - flipped sideways and back, bringing his feet toward the ceiling and simultaneously twisting his neck out of Kakashi's hold.

Vega stretched an arm like a swan to pick up his claw from the bed as he rotated past, then flexed one lean leg in a _pointe_ to propel himself out of range of Kakashi's kunai thrust and toward the floor, where he caught himself on both hands and rolled the momentum into a series of handsprings that carried him across the room and out of immediate danger.

Or should have, if Kakashi wasn't already in the midst of hand signs. Vega came out of his last flip lightly and alert, but he wasn't ready for ninjutsu.

"Water Style Water Dragon Jutsu!" A vicious wave crashed into Vega and slammed him against the far wall of the sex dungeon. Kakashi was running toward the point of impact to finish it, where the assassin sat unmoving against the wall. _No! My commission - the intel - I' won't be able to complete the assignment…_ Hanare's eyes were wide.

But just as Kakashi reached him Vega sprang to life. A simple sliding sweep kick, lightning-fast, caught the ninja off guard - _poof!_ \- it was just a shadow clone. The real Kakashi emerged from the water behind Vega, but the assassin managed to block Kakashi's kunai with the claw.

"Who the hell are you?!" Vega snarled.

"A friend of Rei's," Kakashi said.

 _No, no - don't say that!_ Hanare groaned inwardly.

"Lightning Blade!" Kakashi lunged forward with his off hand. Vega could only partially avoid it and the smell of seared flesh filled the room.

"Aaargh!" Vega shrieked. Hanare was sure he was just as upset over the likely scar across his abs as the actual injury. Impressively, Vega's speed and athleticism allowed him to strike back at Kakashi in the half second the ninja was open from his release. Vega's fist slammed into Kakashi's face and as the assassin crumpled to a knee from his torso wound he raked Kakashi across the gut with the three-bladed claw.

Kakashi twisted away and stopped, panting. He was wounded. Hanare watched the blood drip from his torso. But she wasn't concerned - it was superficial. And Kakashi was favored in this fight anyway - one of the reasons she hadn't interfered. Thank goodness he hadn't actually killed Vega...

"You little shit," Vega rasped, clutching his midsection and staring at Kakashi venomously. Vega was definitely out of the fight. Even a shallow cut from Lightning Blade would take down most fighters. Vega crouched on the floor, eyeing the shinobi intruder. Then his eye slid to Rei.

"You _know_ him?" Vega demanded. "What is going on, here?"

Kakashi staggered to his feet. Hanare jumped up from the bed. She ran across the room, gold heels clicking. Her hands were still cuffed. She reached Kakashi, a smile of gratitude and relief on her face.

"Rei," Kakashi said, looking at her and then, realizing she was nude, quickly dropping his gaze. "Ah, here, let me get those for you." His chakra crackled around his hand and he carefully sliced through the cuffs. They clattered to the ground.

Hanare threw her arms around Kakashi. "Oh, Kakashi!" Hesitantly, Kakashi hugged her back. Vega snorted in disgust. "Oh, Kakashi," Hanare said, nuzzling his neck, seeming not to care if she got blood on herself from his wound… "Thank you! I owe you one."

"You're wel-" Kakashi collapsed to the ground. He could see and hear, but he couldn't move. A senbon protruded from his neck.

Vega's jaw dropped. Then maniacal laughter filled the room. "Nicely done, Rei! I don't think he saw that coming - who did you say he was?"

"An ex-boyfriend," Kakashi heard Hanare reply. He tried to move but he couldn't even manage a finger twitch. Hanare's gold shoes appeared in front of him. He noticed the heel on one had a rhinestone missing from the back. Then he felt the touch of Hanare's hand on his face. She pulled down his mask, and her finger pressed against his lips. He tasted a mild sweetness, and then things began to get hazy.

"Nighty-night, _Kenta_ ," was the last thing he heard.

…


	17. Chapter 17

"So I figured they'd show themselves sooner or later," Rei said, giggling from the passenger side of the Maserati.

"Imbeciles - they've been stalking you at the club?" Vega said. They were driving across town. Vega's boss had called an impromptu late meeting. Rei nodded.

"They could be after you. I just assumed it was personal, but you never know. You don't have anything to hide, do you?" She ran her fingers lightly along his lap. Vega chuckled, then frowned.

"Well the India deal. That's been a major headache."

"I didn't know you had other clubs!" Rei chirped.

"Not a club. It's for moving weapons into the region via a hotel chain."

"You're in _arms?"_ Rei gasped, impressed. "Um, I'm a little scared to meet your boss, to be honest."

Vega shook his head. "You need to. I want you to tell him about these Leaf ninja yourself. We don't usually deal with their kind. You might be a great asset to Shadowloo, actually."

"Okay," Rei said skeptically. "I had hoped to get away from other ninja in this city, though…"

"I've heard they're like a bad STD," Vega said. "Once you've got them on your ass…"

"They keep coming back!" Rei giggled.

"We might get along after all, Rei," Vega smiled. They drove under a freeway sign that said _Exit 191: Downtown and Waterfront District._ Vega guided the Maserati to the right and they flew down the offramp.

…

"Kash's been quiet a long time," Asuma mumbled, smoke wafting into the night sky from his cigarette. They were on the roof of the club.

Guy stretched, surreptitiously glancing around the mostly empty Paradise parking lot. "I don't like it either," he said. "But we can't make a move without an update."

Just then the back door of the club opened. A man in a red beret, a tall bald man with an eye patch, and a swol guy wearing boxing gloves came out. They got into a limo, one of the few cars left in the lot. The limo started its engine.

"Guy, you think we should-"

"Yeah. He told us to watch the VIPs."

Asuma nodded. "I'll go." He leaped down from the roof, sticking to shadows, and landed next to the Kawasaki parked in a handicapped spot. "Dante's Baby" was embroidered on the seat. "Sorry Dante," Asuma murmured, throwing his cig on the pavement, "But you do need a handicap tag to use these spaces." Asuma tied his Guardian Shinobi bandana over his nose and mouth.

The limo peeled out of the parking lot. A quick hand sign combo he hadn't used since his rebellious days, and the bike roared to life. "Hotwire Jutsu," Asuma grunted in satisfaction. "Still got it."

Guy watched Asuma zip out of the lot after the VIP limo. He was about to try to radio Kakashi one more time when he saw Pink Paradise's back door open again… it was Yuki! The hostess was running at top speed toward an alley nearby. Guy's heart raced - what should he do?!

"Well, we know Hanare and the assassin didn't come back yet… and the VIPs left… and now Yuki - dammit!" Guy scratched his head.

In the end, youth won out. He followed Yuki to the alley. She was flinging aside a tarp from a mound behind the dumpster - the mound turned out to be two helmets and a Ducati.

"What the-" Guy's foot knocked a pebble from the roof. Yuki looked up sharply.

"Oh, is that you, jumpsuit-sama?" she called. Guy had never felt prouder: Yuki had remembered him.

"It's me, sweet Yuki!" Guy called.

"Get down here then, if you can fight at all!" she ordered. The hostess buckled on a helmet and threw her leg over the motorcycle. Guy leaped off the roof into the air, silhouetted against the moon for a split second before he changed to a swan dive and aerial somersaulted directly onto the back of the Ducati behind Yuki.

"Oof," he said as he landed. Yuki handed him a helmet.

"Nice moves. But didn't that squish your balls a little?"

Guy flashed a pearly smile. "No seat will ever defeat my testicles in a random flying landing. I'm Might Guy - the Green Beast of Konoha. And there's nothing more youthful than a jarring impact to the crotch every now and then, my dear Yuki!"

Yuki giggled. "I think you meant that in a totally wholesome way! How sweet. Now shut up so we can go help our friends."

The little hostess opened up the throttle and they sped out of the alley, away into the night.

…

The stadium was closed but a couple floodlights rotated around the perimeter. Hanare looked up into the deep blue sky and thought unwillingly of the fabric of Konoha uniforms. She hoped Kakashi was getting enough oxygen, stuffed as he was in the trunk of Vega's Maserati.

"Does your boss… often summon you for sudden meetings?" Rei said, looking apprehensively at their surroundings.

Vega shrugged as he cut the engine. "Sometimes." He hid his own nervousness with a stern look. Hanare felt the skin on the back of her neck tingle. Not a good sign. Vega was getting out of the car. He paused to adjust his fitted light gray suit and smooth his hair. He checked the time on his Piaget watch.

"Are we bringing the scrub?" Rei jerked her head toward the trunk. Vega chuckled.

"Cold-hearted Rei. I like it. Can't say I'm looking forward to having you as an ex-girlfriend, though." Vega opened the trunk. Hanare giggled and slid out of the passenger side. She came around the car to watch. Vega was holding up a partially-conscious Kakashi Hatake by a fistful of flak. He dragged him out of the trunk and dropped him roughly on the ground.

Kakashi grunted as he hit the pavement, blinking groggily. The sleeping serum would still be heavily in effect-it had only been a couple hours. Hanare was surprised to see the shinobi conscious at all…

"Sorry," he mumbled thickly, not moving. He sounded delirious but he was looking right at Hanare. She pretended not to hear but slightly inclined her head. Then she walked over and kicked Kakashi viciously in the stomach.

"Oof!" the ninja gasped, gagged, and threw up-narrowly missing Vega's shoe.

"Ack! What are you doing?!" The assassin step quickly aside, glared at Rei and looked with disgust upon the man on the ground. "These are crocodile! Watch where you're puking." Vega went back to checking his phone.

"That was for standing me up that one time!" Rei sneered at their captive. Vega was sending an email. Kakashi slightly nodded at the green-haired woman.

"Alright. Let's go," Vega said, sliding his phone into his pocket and hauling Kakashi to his feet. "Do not make any more messes. Or I'll have Rei sew your lips shut," he hissed, shoving the ninja forward. Kakashi stumbled, and Rei laughed. She linked her arm through Vega's and they walked leisurely toward the stadium.

The shinobi prisoner shuffled unsteadily ahead of them, his hands bound and wrapped in duct tape so he couldn't sign; his ankles shackled so he couldn't run. His mask was down and rumpled around his neck. He hung his head as he walked slowly in front of his captors.

It appeared they were the first to arrive for the meeting. The lot was empty and they passed into the dark of the arena's entry tunnel without seeing another soul.

"Don't get any ideas, ninja!" Vega's voice lashed out like whip. Kakashi shuffled obediently toward the stadium's field. Rei leaned into Vega and sighed.

"This isn't exactly how I pictured the end to our evening," she whispered huskily. Vega glanced down at her. She smiled and blushed prettily. He raised an eyebrow.

"Well hopefully it won't take too long," he replied, reflexly licking his lips as his eyes dropped to her body, concealed enticingly once again in the tight black velvet cheongsam.

The arena field was eerily lit by the cold lights punctuating the sidelines, casting everything in a cold blue-white tint.

"That's far enough, you," Vega called out and Kakashi stopped on the 50-yard line. The assassin walked over and grabbed Kakashi by the shoulder, shoving him down onto his knees. Kakashi knelt, panting from the effort of movement. Hanare's gaze flicked over his face. He didn't look good… he was too pale and the fluorescent lights showed dark circles under his eyes. Even having vomited up some of the sleeping draught, his system would still be suffering side effects.

Vega sat down and reclined on the first row of bleachers. "Watch him," he ordered Rei, flicking a wrist at the kneeling shinobi. Hanare bristled inwardly but nodded, taking up a position to the side of their captive. She reached into the cutout neckline of her dress and pulled out a kunai. Vega raised his eyebrows. Hanare smirked. She listened to Kakashi's labored breathing with an indifferent, icy expression on her face. _At least this way, if something happens I'm close enough to pro-_

Her thoughts were cut off by a whirring noise like a helicopter. Hanare instinctively stepped into a defensive stance, head snapping upward to peer into the sky.

"It's Bison," she heard Vega shout over the whir. Above, a purple miasma spun like a giant shuriken in the air over the stadium. It writhed in the sky like a wound, slowly lowering toward them, and Hanare could make out three figures standing on top of the violet energy concentration: a tall lean man with an eyepatch, a thickly-muscled American boxer, and behind them-but clearly in charge-a man in a red beret.

Hanare inched toward Kakashi. His tired gaze was also trained on the new arrivals- visible right eye dark and calculating, Sharingan concealed beneath his left that was squeezed shut. His headband had been knocked out of place earlier, his hair was even more messed up than usual, and his face was still exposed from when she'd uncovered it to administer the sleeping potion.

Kakashi's mouth was set in a concerned line… Hanare had a sudden desire to pull his mask up for him… but she simply glared like he was nothing to her but scum, keeping her kunai raised. The purple cloud lowered to the field in front of them, and the strange energy dissipated like fog.

The man in the red beret approached, flanked by the two others. He had a stately gait and a cloak that trailed behind him. Hanare heard Vega get up. He smoothly came forward and bowed courteously.

"M. Bison, sir."

"Incompetent," the man in the beret-Bison-said. His voice was inhumanly low and threatening. Hanare watched as Vega's sycophantic expression changed to shock and he ran a hand nervously over his hair and down his luxurious braid.

"Wha-what? Excuse me, sir, did-"

"The operation is compromised. You have a spy in your midst somewhere, it seems… _Vega._ " Bison's gaze slid over to Hanare. She involuntarily shivered. His eyes were dead-looking white, but limned with the same purple energy that had carried him down from the heavens. "Who's this?"

Vega recovered and smiled ingratiatingly. "This is Rei. She's an ex-kunoichi. Highly trained. I thought she might be of use to-"

"Kunoichi, eh?" Bison's eyes flickered and traveled slowly down Hanare's body. She lowered her kunai, and half-bowed politely. The feeling of being appraised by the scarlet-clad man was akin to being scanned by Biyakugan… except creepier. Hanare had the suspicion that Bison could see past her clothes-including her chakra flows, and… other things. She swallowed. The experience was extremely invasive, and he was taking his time. The eerie gaze lingered between her legs. Hanare tried to stand tall and not flinch.

The man in the eyepatch chuckled. " _Thought she might be of use_ is Vega-speak for _Was hoping to fuck her._ "

The other man in the boxing gloves laughed uproariously. Bison's lips twitched.

"Did you? I didn't see much of you in there." He nodded toward Hanare's womb.

Vega glowered at the eyepatch-wearer. "We were _interrupted,_ " he said pointedly but politely to Bison. "By _that._ "

Everyone turned to look at dishevelled Kakashi. His head lolled to the side. He appeared to be barely clinging to consciousness.

Bison frowned. "That's not the mole either. Who else, Vega? The allies have someone here. You must have _some_ idea. Who else could it be?" The purple flared around his empty eyes. Vega blanched.

A crazy idea flew into Hanare's head. The least expected person… suddenly, she _knew_ and that meant she had another person to protect…

"I-I might have a lead, let me make some calls," Vega babbled. Bison gave him a deadly look. "In… in the meantime, why not get to know Rei? She wants to join Shadowloo!" Vega shoved Hanare forward. She gasped and stumbled, but the man in the eyepatch reached out a long arm and caught her before she crashed into Bison's chest.

"Does she now? How suspicious," Bison said in a bored voice. His eyes swiveled to her. The man in the eyepatch kept one wrapped hand clamped over her shoulder.

 _Better to be in too deep than not in at all_ was the thought that flitted through Hanare's mind… a mantra taught to her by one of the Lock grannies… a toothless hag that had bragged about bedding over 100 shinobi… each of whom she'd assassinated after the tryst.

"You might not like the Shadowloo uniform," Bison said, his lips curving up mirthlessly.

"Please. I'm a stripper," Hanare said.


	18. Chapter 18

Bison chuckled without any real humor behind it. Kakashi felt sweat roll down his neck. This situation had escalated fast, and there was nothing the Copy Nin liked less than feeling completely out of control.

Vega was standing a ways off yelling into his phone in Spanish. Hana was surrounded by the other thugs. Kakashi flexed his fingers. He'd cut the tape a while back with a micro-lightning release during Bison's entrance. He could sign if he needed to, but would it be enough? If only he had backup…

"Ah. A stripper. Vega has fine taste in women. You won't mind getting undressed then." The man in the eyepatch motioned at Hanare.

"N-now? Y-you mean… here?" she stammered. The men laughed.

"Shadowloo maintains high standards." The eyepatch guy nodded at Bison. "We need to see if you meet them." Hanare looked from one to the other, and her face slowly turned red.

Kakashi knew better than to get angry. She was acting, after all. He shouldn't make assumptions… let his emotions get in the way of-damn it, that was partially why they were in this situation to begin with! He gritted his teeth. Even so, it was hard to just stand by and… _if only I knew Guy and Asuma's status-did they stay at Paradise? If I could just radio…_

The com unit had been damaged in the Vega fight. Kakashi swore in his head. Mostly at himself.

"Well if I have to-" Hanare was saying, as she bit her lip and started to unzip her dress. The sliver of exposed skin shone in the cold lights.

"Too slow," Bison smiled, and blinked. Suddenly, Hanare was engulfed in purple flames. She shrieked, and Kakashi's heart leaped. He started-

The flames died as suddenly as they'd appeared, and it looked like all they'd done was taken Hana's clothes with them. She stood speechless, in her black bra and thong.

"You're the best, boss," said the American boxer, and he and the eyepatch thug guffawed. Bison had the ghost of a smile on his face, but there was something so detached about all of his actions that it twisted Kakashi's insides. He felt another drop of sweat roll down his temple.

"Ah!" Hanare finally said. She covered up with her arms, but the two underlings grabbed her wrists and made her stand so they could gawk at her. Vega's angry Spanish swearing drifted over. He was still on the phone, trying to figure out who'd infiltrated his operation.

"Measurements?" Bison intoned.

"Huh?" Hanare said. The guy in the eyepatch patted her rump. "Oh! Um, 34-24-35…"

The boxer poked her in the chest.

"C cup," Hanare gasped. "5'4"? 115…"

"Skinny," Bison said. He motioned with his chin. The underlings spun her around so their boss could check out the rear view. Her green hair looked almost turquoise in the stadium light. Kakashi breathed heavily, focusing chakra and forcing it into his bloodstream to counteract the poison. He wasn't sure where this was going and had to be ready. He also wasn't sure how much more he could take. The urge to fight was rippling hard through him…

Vega was finally off the phone. He marched over. "I have a lead," he announced triumphantly. Bison gave him a stoic glance. "A girl at the Club. So ditzy I never would've expected, but-"

"Hey Boss Man!" Rei's voice rang out. "You're a psychic type, aren't you?" she interjected, twisting her head around to look at Bison with a challenging expression. "I can tell. I have something you might wanna look at..."

"Rei, don't interrupt!" Vega snapped, but Bison extended a purple tendril of energy and slapped the assassin across the face, silencing him without moving a muscle. Vega, shocked and humiliated, shut his mouth. The other thugs chuckled.

Bison smirked at Rei. "Abracadabra," he said. "What do you have that I haven't already seen?"

Rei twisted free of the gangsters' restraining grip. She marched up to Bison and tilted her head up, tapping her temple as she looked him square in the face.

 _What on earth is she doing_ Kakashi swore to himself, surreptitiously working on the ankle shackles with a toothpick he'd saved from brunch.

"A while back some mysterious agent tried to recruit me to spy on Vega," Hanare was saying. "All I got was a phone call and a file slid under my door, but if you're some big-shot psychic, you should be able to reverse-trace from my memories to that agent, possibly to their whole cell."

Kakashi blinked. _Can this guy do that? Is Hana lying? Why would she want him to get in her head-_ suddenly it dawned on Kakashi, clear as day. And he did _not_ like the plan. _No, no, no-Hana!-it's too damn risky…_

Bison put a hand to his chiseled chin. "Hmm. You might be more than you appear, eh? How do you know about this technique?"

"I'm an espionage specialist," Hanare said proudly, putting her hands on her hips. "I'm well-versed in all mental techniques, and I'm also a neural-torture expert."

Bison smiled. "You expect me to believe you didn't take the job from the allies?"

Rei snickered. "You can see for yourself, Boss Man." She tapped her head again. "I probably should have… it paid well. But… I once again let my personal life get in the way…" she gave a significant glance toward Vega.

Bison considered. "You will have to improve your taste in men at Shadowloo," he grinned. "Kneel."

Kakashi felt the shackle _click_ just in time. _Thank Gamabunta for luck._ He channeled chakra to his left eye, pooling it there, ready to back Hanare up. _I hope Guy and Asuma disobeyed my orders to stay at Paradise_ … he sighed inwardly. Four-to-two was not good odds, especially given his weakened condition and this Bison fellow's insane chakra levels…

Bison raised a hand above Hana's head. She knelt before him, face slack and eyes vacant. Another purple tendril of energy manifested from Bison's palm and writhed down to Hanare's face, pushing itself into her open mouth. Bison's eyes glowed. Vega and the other two thugs watched the ritual apprehensively. Hana's head jerked back. Kakashi watched, body tensing, as the muscles in her neck reflexly spasmed as the purple chakra forced itself into her.

 _I have to trust in her ability_ Kakashi reminded himself, willing his hands to relax. _This isn't her first time. She believes she can do it._ But despite his efforts, Kakashi's heart thudded in his chest. _It's that same feeling… when I entered our home that day… crossing the threshold… the silence on the other side of the sliding door… my father-_

Purple light flared from Hanare's eyes, her head was thrown back and her body limp like a marionette, kneeling and held up only by the strands of violet incandescence that pulsed from Bison's fingers.

Suddenly, Bison stiffened. The hand hovering over the kneeling woman jerked as if to recoil, but could not. The man's jaw tensed, veins bulging. Kakashi was ready. _If this goes wrong…_

Blood trickled from Bison's nose. Finally, the thugs noticed something was wrong. "Boss?!" said the American boxer, his face twisted in worry.

"Is this normal?" Vega asked the man in the eyepatch, not sounding in any particular rush to help. The tall bald man shook his head.

"I've never seen-but, I don't know anything about how Bison's powers work… We can't interfere, or-"

A booming rush. Purple flames flared outward from Rei and Bison. Hanare collapsed to the ground like a doll. Bison fell straight back, stiff as a board…

 _She did it!_ Kakashi felt relief start to flood his senses-

Bison's body stopped mid-fall. It levitated in the air, then slowly righted itself until the scarlet-clad man was standing upright once again.

"Boss?! You okay?" The three thugs, including Vega, cowered unhelpfully from where they'd sheltered themselves from the explosion.

"Worthless. All of you," Bison said in a monotone. "This one might've been useful, but..." He leaned over Hanare's inert form. His eyes glowed with cruel white emptiness. "You surprised me with that little snare."

Kakashi aimed carefully. Bison raised his right hand and it flared to life with purple fire. "A shame," he said, he clenched his hand into a fist, brought it rushing down toward Hanare-

Kakashi's left eye snapped open. " _Kamui!_ "

A vortex pinpointed at Bison's right shoulder opened up, sucking hungrily at the life force of the man in red. His fist retracted and his entire body wavered as it was pulled slowly to the epicenter.

Kakashi noted to his relief that as he predicted, Bison's minions were too terrified of being sucked in themselves to mount a counterattack. Vega shoved the boxer in front of him, and the eyepatch guy jumped further back. Sweat dripped down Kakashi's forehead as he strove to keep the vortex attuned to Bison and away from Hanare-it was an imperfect technique; discovered accidentally and still experimental…

 _If only I was an Uchiha._ Kakashi longed for the physical stamina and chakra levels of the famed clan. _A borrowed eye. I'm just a charlatan._ He'd discovered the Mangekyo ability of Obito's Sharingan only recently…

Kakashi froze. Bison was looking directly at _him_. Even with his face pulled toward the oblivion of Kamui, Bison grinned with such a malevolence that Kakashi's will wavered. The negative thoughts in his mind seemed to double and then triple in magnitude, and fatigue started to overtake his body…

That was when he noticed Bison had started _to pull away from_ the vortex! _No-_ Kakashi thought wildly, watching in horror as Bison inched back into reality, wresting his physicality from Kamui's whorls as he gained the upper hand in their deadly tug-of-war.

"So the little ninja woke up." Bison flexed his right hand. Kakashi couldn't believe it-the guy wasn't even injured! The vortex wavered, and then closed-Kakashi unable to maintain it any longer. He panted, crouched as though he was still bound. Hana lay unconscious near Bison. Close enough that Kakashi could intercept any-

"Oof!" Kakashi slammed into the bleachers. _What the…_ He hadn't even seen Bison move! Purple fire licked his vest and Kakashi patted it out. Bison was coming out of a spin, backflipping impossibly high into the air as he did, grinning as he levitated back down to the turf.

 _What is up with this guy_ … Kakashi recalled Hanare's words. "Psychic-type-" _Ah, so he's reading my mind_ , Kakashi thought sheepishly. It also appeared he had a suite of attacks that mimicked high-level offensive ninjutsu. And he was fast.

A dozen Kakashis sprang up from the bleachers.

"What the-" the guy in the eyepatch shouted.

"Clones," Vega sneered, shrugging out of his blazer and pulling out his claw from his handcrafted Italian leather man-bag.

"Pounding time," said the American boxer with a grin that was more gold than tooth.

Six Kakashis surrounded the thugs, while five more circled behind Bison. The one still standing on the ground in front of him put its hands together.

"Great Mud River!" the silver-haired shinobi shouted. There was a roar, and a cascading wall of sludge rushed at Bison.

"Ugh!" Vega grunted, doing back handsprings away from the torrent before he got any mud on his shoes. Two Kakashis harried his retreat with shuriken.

The eyepatch guy sprang toward the bleachers to avoid the jutsu, fending off physical attacks from two more Kakashis. _A kickboxer_ he noted, and quite a strong one…

The American-style boxer just stood there, a rock planted in the ground, and mud rushed around him. He grinned as a Kakashi attacked from either side-his glove-clad fists whipped out and punched them into oblivion. The clones _poofed_ out of existence.

 _Faster than I expected_ Kakashi thought. _And completely insane, apparently_ he amended as the boxer roared and laughed, flailing in the mud with a wild look on his face as he searched for a new punching bag.

The mud rushed over where Hana lay and she disappeared from sight. Bison sneered and levitated rapidly-before he realized something was holding him to the ground. He looked down with a growl.

The silver-haired shinobi had burst from the ground and gripped Bison's ankle like a vise. The ninja's other hand flickered with a blinding white light that crackled-

Bison flew straight up into the air at incredible speed, pulling Kakashi with him.

"Chidori!" Kakashi propelled himself upward with his grip on Bison's ankle and aimed the release at his opponent's gut…

The Lightning Blade was but an inch from impact when Bison twisted in the air, throwing off the attack as he suddenly changed trajectory. Kakashi was thrown sideways and the last thing he saw was a flaming purple fist.

 _Poof_! The clone vanished in a cloud of smoke. Bison hovered in the air, beset as five other Kakashis swooped in to attack. He spun, kicked, and chopped in mid-air, various parts of his body alight with violet fire. None of the clones even got close to landing a blow.

In the tunnel leading into the arena, Kakashi lay Hanare down on the cold concrete. "Hanare!" he said, shaking her gently. "Hana!" The Copy Ninja put a palm on her chest. After a moment, he leaned over and pressed his lips to hers.

The kunoichi gasped. Blinking, she winced, flinching away from the man above her.

"I'm sorry," Kakashi whispered. "Hana, it's just me. You were unconscious."

Her eyes widened. "Bison-"

"I thought you had him," Kakashi's voice was warm and admiring. Hanare felt dizzy. She looked up into his shadowed face. He looked like hell. His mouth was still exposed, and he was smiling.

Hanare frowned deeply. "Damn! I was so careful-the Neural Asphyxiation jutsu should have-"

"There's no time for that now!" Kakashi interjected firmly. "You did it perfectly, Hana, he was just too strong. It happens." He brushed his fingers gently across her forehead, over the dissatisfied creases in her brow, and into the river of green hair.

"Kakashi..?" Hanare turned her head toward the stadium. "What's-"

"I'm getting my ass kicked," he shrugged, wincing as he felt another clone bite the dust. "They have to go through a couple more shadow clones… and then we need to have a plan B."

"I can't leave," Hanare said.

"Can you walk?" Kakashi said, ignoring her. "We need to regroup."

"I. Can't. Leave." Hanare glared at him. She was trying to sit up, arms shaking.

Kakashi sighed and pulled his mask back up into place. "Why not," he said, reaching out and lifting her in his arms. He turned and set her against the wall of the tunnel.

"They know…" Hanare hesitated.

"Mmm hmm?" Kakashi made sure she was propped up comfortably. He checked his vest pockets and moved a couple scrolls to his pants. It was amusing that Hana didn't trust him quite enough to divulge what she'd figured out. Kakashi unzipped his vest and shrugged out of it.

He smoothed the flak over Hanare while she was still belligerently talking at him. "It's… the agent they're looking for. I know who it is now. I have to take Vega out, at least-or he'll kill her."

Kakashi sighed again. "We could retreat. Get help. Find your friend." _She looks nice in a Konoha vest_ he thought. Though it wasn't like she _didn't_ look nice in the skimpy black underwear, too… Kakashi reached back and scratched his head.

"What if they find her first?" Hanare challenged. She was trying to stand up using the wall as leverage. Her body trembled and she fell. Kakashi caught her and set her back in place.

"You're in no condition to fight," Kakashi said harshly. _Ouch_. _There went the last clone_. Kakashi felt the sensation of its pain and defeat rush into him. Hanare was biting her lip, eyes angry and wet.

"I have to do _something_ -" she gritted.

"I'll take care of it," Kakashi said. "But you have to promise to _stay right here_ … until I get back. Or, until Asuma and Guy do." He glanced at her downcast eyes from the corner of his. Her mouth stiffened. Kakashi adjusted his gloves and pulled his forehead protector down on the left side.

Hanare looked like she would argue. "I have to go," Kakashi said. "Remember, deal's off if you move from this spot!" Hanare finally raised her eyes. She nodded, once.

Kakashi tilted his head slightly, taking in her face one more time. He raised his right hand and waved, eyes creased in a smile. A _fwoof_ of smoke, and then he was gone.


	19. Chapter 19

The odds had gotten even worse. Four-on-one was not a good way to go, Kakashi thought as he ate a purple fireball to the stomach.

" _Unghh_ ," he grunted as he rolled into a recovery. Kakashi had discovered that as long as he stayed off the ground, the guy in the boxing gloves was pretty much out of the fight since it appeared he could barely jump. The boxer had to literally stump up each bleacher individually to get near Kakashi.

That was great, except it meant Kakashi had to stay on the awkward terrain of the bleachers or completely aerial-which gave Bison, with his levitating abilities-a distinct advantage.

Kakashi knew Bison was just toying with him anyway. The man in scarlet floated a safe distance from the shinobi and deployed various ranged attacks all made of psychic purple fire. He was letting Vega and the kickboxer in the eyepatch do the dirty work of actually trying to bring down the pesky ninja.

The idea was to just wait till there was an opening; kill Vega, and flee with Hanare. Kakashi blocked a barrage of chakra blasts that had, surprisingly, come from the _kickboxer's_ fists… and tried to goad Vega into slipping up.

"Couldn't get there with Rei, huh?" Kakashi shouted down to the Spanish assassin. Vega glowered. He adjusted his mask, long braid whipping out behind him. The stadium floodlights crisscrossed the night sky behind his silhouette. His muscles rippled under a huge snake tattoo. Kakashi briefly wondered if Hanare had _wanted_ to sleep with this guy… even a little. He frowned.

Vega brandished his claw. "Is that the best you've got, ninja? Petty insults? You think I'll fall for that cheap bait?"

Kakashi ran along a row of bleachers above Vega. He loosed a barrage of shuriken at the eyepatch guy, who lost his balance and fell down a few levels.

Kakashi stopped and shrugged at the assassin. "I just wanted to see if anyone beat my record."

"Record? What record?" Vega leaped toward the silver-haired shinobi.

Kakashi parried a claw blow. "You know," he chuckled amicably. Vega hissed.

"What are you talking about?!"

"You must've not beaten it," Kakashi said, chuckling as he ducked a roundhouse. "You would've known if you had."

"Shut up!" Vega said, and spun in a series of attacks so fast that Kakashi had to focus for a minute. The claw clashed against kunai as they battled across the nosebleed seats.

"You didn't get laid, did you?" Kakashi said. "Sorry, man."

"Aaargh!" Vega tried to eviscerate his masked opponent. Kakashi dodged back. _There._ He took the opening and twisted sideways, bringing his leg up in a vicious kick. Shinobi sandal crashed into Vega's mask, shattering it.

"MY FACE," Vega shrieked, throwing up his arms to clutch frantically at the damage. Kakashi flipped a second kunai from his off-hand sleeve. _It's over…_ The blow would sever the assassin's spinal cord-

"What?!" Kakashi couldn't move. He was floating in mid-air. Purple energy coursed around his body. Kakashi floated over and past Vega, who was crouched over the pieces of his mask.

Kakashi turned in the air, and found himself face-to-face with the man in the red beret.

"You have no idea of the extent of my powers," Bison grinned, answering Kakashi's unspoken question. "And you think too much. Too easy to read, for someone like me."

Bison floated down to the field with Kakashi in tow. "And I already know who the mole is. I read it from Vega's mind. Your green-haired companion should've known it was futile to try and keep information from me. She is talented, but still far from my level of psychic mastery."

Kakashi tried in vain _not_ to think of Hanare.

"Oh, hidden in the tunnel, is she? I had thought you had some backbone and had sacrificed her to try and get to me in our earlier battle. I see you are more sentimental than I had presumed."

Bison dropped onto the ground, but kept Kakashi suspended in the air before him. "It's of no consequence. She won't be able to escape me. A shame I had to let Vega live; you and that woman would make far more interesting servants. But then, who would run the Club cover? Only Vega is fit for such filth. And Rose has told me-no more collecting new minions…"

Kakashi felt terror seize his soul. This Bison was not only more powerful than anyone he'd ever faced, but also ludicrously crazy. A true psychopath.

Suddenly, Kakashi longed to be back in Konoha. A wave of homesickness so strong that it physically hurt crashed into him. A vision of he and Hana standing above the Hokage monument, looking out at the sunset, flashed through his mind. The Konoha rooftops were limned in red. She reached out and took his hand.

Kakashi realized he couldn't breathe. The purple fire was a death cell. He couldn't move, and the flames were constricting, suppressing...

"So easy to snuff out," Bison said. "But it takes too long." Kakashi watched Bison's fingers burst into violet incandescence. His lungs screamed for air, but it would be over soon, anyway-Bison's hand sliced through the air like a knife, a perfect arc aimed at Kakashi's heart…

A _foot_ crashed into Bison's head from above, driving the red beret more than six feet into the ground. A cloud of dust rose up, the spell broke, and Kakashi tumbled to the ground, gasping for air.

"LEAF VILLAGE PILEDRIVER HEEL OF DAMNATION," someone announced belatedly.

Kakashi blinked, completely confused, looked up and found himself staring at Hanare's butt. She was wearing his flak vest, standing protectively in front of him, arms outstretched. It was like with Rin… only, in reverse? Sort of? And there was a butt. Er, _her_ butt.

"Hanare?" Kakashi croaked. Sounds of battle could be heard from elsewhere on the field. Hana had her head turned to the side and her face screwed up as if anticipating impact. She cracked an eye open.

"Am I dead?" she said.

"Dead…" Kakashi's dazed expression changed to a stern glare. "Did you step in front of me to block the blow?!" he nearly shouted. Hanare looked back at him guiltily.

"Damn it, we had an agreement! You promised-" he growled. Hana winced. "I thought you couldn't walk!" Kakashi yelled.

"I guess I was MOTIVATED," Hanare shouted back.

"What good would that-bah, you would've been dead, and I still would've suffocated in his stasis spell-!" Kakashi was livid. He pushed himself up on one arm, ignoring all the pain from everywhere.

"Like I didn't have more of a plan than that!" Hanare snapped, hands on hips. "Give me some credit, O Sharingan Warrior! You're not the only one with a brain out here-"

"I'm the only one using it," Kakashi said, rising unsteadily to his feet and brushing past Hanare. He couldn't think straight. All he felt was impotent anger and he had to do something, anything…

"What?!" Hanare shrieked. She opened her mouth to say more but exhaustion and frustration overcame her words. She hung her head. There was a lick on her palm. It was Biscuit.

"Kakashi," Pakkun said.

The silver-haired ninja's head whipped around. "Pakkun?! How the hell-"

The pug jumped into the Copy Nin's arms. Kakashi thought he heard Guy and Asuma shouting some distance away. "She summoned us," Pakkun grunted, looking at Hanare. The green-haired kunoichi had faltered to the ground, and both Biscuit and Bull were attending to her.

"How? That's impossible," Kakashi glared.

"She had a vial of your blood," Pakkun whispered. "Kinda creepy if you ask me. How well do you know this girl, Kakashi?"

"I like her better than the others," Biscuit interjected. "The other ones wear too many clothes. Look how nice this outfit is." The beagle mix affably sniffed and snuggled against Hanare's thong and borrowed vest ensemble.

"Everyone- _shut up_." Kakashi ran a hand through his hair. Hanare looked up at him. There were tears on her cheeks. Kakashi felt his insides roil.

"I drew blood from you after I drugged you, in case I needed to come up with a personalized antidote," she said softly.

"You still shouldn't have been able to summon my pack," Kakashi said.

"I don't know why it worked," Hanare whispered.

"Who cares, Kakashi?" Pakkun said. "Good thing it did. You were in quite a fix."

"I had something in mind-"

"Like shit you did," Pakkun chastised. "We were gonna bite him in the nuts to break the stasis trap, after Hana here blocked his shot at you."

"Hey, Boss?" Biscuit nodded toward the the Bison-shaped hole. There was a slight rumble, like something was moving down there…

" _Rei_ ," a familiar voice hissed. Kakashi turned awkwardly. His arms felt sluggish, and his ankle burned and throbbed like it might be fractured. Vega alighted on the field, his face bloody beneath the half-shattered mask. Blood dripped from his claw as well. Kakashi didn't want to know whose it was.

"Vega," Hanare nodded. Her tears were gone and her gaze was steely. She, too, managed to stand. "What do you want?" she demanded, stepping between the assassin and Kakashi with Bull, Shiba, Biscuit, and Guruko at her side. Kakashi heard Uhei's baying call from the north of the stadium, and presumed he, Urushi and Akino must be helping battle the others.

"Rei!" It was Yuki. She ran up to stand shoulder to shoulder with her green-haired friend. "Sorry we were late-the bridge was up!"

"We?"

"Jumpsuit man came with," Yuki giggled.

Vega took a step closer. "Oh good. You're here too. Now I can kill all of you at once."

"He knows, Yuki-" Hanare started to say, her voice apologetic. "I figured it out as they were discussing it, but I couldn't get them in time. I'm sorry, I wanted to keep you-"

"They know? Oh good! Then I can finally… Take. Off. This…" Yuki peeled off her face. _A prosthetic_ -! Kakashi marveled.

"Hot. And uncomfortable…" Yuki was dropping garments like autumn leaves. "Disguise!"

"... _Yuki?!_ " Hanare exclaimed as a dark pigtailed wig hit the ground. There was another tremor from the Bison-hole. Yuki-or whoever-turned to face Vega. Hanare and Kakashi stared with jaws hanging open. In place of the flouncy pink hostess was a lean (yet still buxom) fighter clad in blue. She had a youthful face, even prettier than "Yuki" had been, and wore her hair in two buns. The woman had the most muscular thighs Hanare had ever seen…

Vega was, apparently, the most shocked of all. " _You!_ " he nearly screamed, face contorted in rage.

"Long time no see," the blue woman said. "I guess I need to kick your ass again. And this time it's a fair fight, since you're not creeping up on me _in the shower_ , like the total and complete dickhead creep you are, _Vega_."

The ground shook a third time. The woman in blue looked back at Hanare and Kakashi. "Rei-Bison won't be down much longer-I've got backup on the way but you and Kenta here might need to stall." She winked. "I'll take care of Mr. Grabby-Claw."

"Got it," Hanare said, asking no questions in the face of obvious authority. Vega and the woman in blue snarled at each other and leapt into battle.

Purple light flared from the hole in the field.

"Have you ever held a detainment jutsu?" The puff of breath was warm on her ear. Hanare jumped. "Sorry," Kakashi said. Hanare turned, angry words on her tongue… but as she looked at the silver-haired ninja swaying on his feet in front of her, the anger faded to a dull annoyance. She clenched her teeth and put a hand out to steady him.

"No. But I'm an extremely quick study."

"I bet," Kakashi smiled tiredly. "These are the signs." He rattled off the order of seals. "I'll draw it, use my blood. I just need one other person to anchor the opposing side."

"I won't let it fail."

"I may have to draw on your chakra. Mine's almost gone."

"Take whatever you want from me."

Kakashi blinked. Hanare stared. They nodded once at each other and broke to their respective positions.

On the north end of the field, Asuma spat out a tooth. He was starting to regret his words to Guy: " _Bah-I was the Guardian Shinobi Fist of Fury champ. I'll take big ugly down, no jutsu necessary… You handle the pirate kickboxer or whatever he is."_

The boxer was faster than he looked. Asuma had kept his word-no knives, no jutsu, no ninja stuff-but his hand to hand in this style was rusty.

"Give it up, flyweight," the big fella chuckled. "Do you know who I am?" he roared, slamming his gloves together with a crazed look on his face. Asuma massaged his jaw. The dude definitely had lead in those gloves or brass knuckles or _something._

To his right, up on the bleachers, Guy was deadlocked with the other thug. Asuma was confident Guy would gain the upper hand given a little time, though. The Green Beast simply had more in his arsenal. Plus, the ninken were helping distract the kickboxer.

Farther downfield Asuma saw a purple glow start up from the deep hole Guy had slammed the red boss into. Of course they'd known it was unlikely Guy could take him with one shot, but they'd hoped for a longer reprieve. Fortunately it looked like Kash and Hana had also recovered enough to join the fight.

Asuma couldn't bring himself to go back on his word, stupid words though they were. He reached into his vest and pulled out a cigarette. The boxer watched him suspiciously. Asuma cupped his hands and lit up.

"Your mama's so fat they had to invent a triple-wide trailer."

The boxer looked confused. Thought a minute, and then frowned.

"What'd you say about my mom?!"

Asuma coughed. "I said she's so fat she put the Goodyear blimp outta work."

The boxer roared and charged. Asuma ran. Jumped a bench. The boxer punched through it. Then a garbage can, a light post, the bleacher box…

Asuma stayed just ahead of the enraged pugilist. _He will flatten my ass if any of those connect._ Ahead, the scarlet man was levitating out of the hole in the field. Asuma panted and watched as Kakashi slammed a palm down on the turf. Across from Kash, Hanare held the seal of _uma_ , anchoring the rune. Glowing blue lines shot out in a precise design that encased the man in scarlet in a containment bubble. The boss spun slowly in the chakra cage, assessing his prison. _At least they got him for now_ Asuma thought. Pakkun and the remaining ninken were guarding them.

Asuma turned back and stuck out his tongue at the boxer, who went nearly cross-eyed with rage. Asuma sprinted right up to the edge of the hole left by Bison, and at the last second-just as the boxer threw a perfect uppercut at his taunting face-stepped to the side.

The boxer fell flailing into the hole, landing with a thud. He immediately jumped to his feet and tried to clamber out, but it was just slightly too deep. His pitiful jumps couldn't get him close enough. He bellowed incoherently from the pit-trap.

"Bingo," said Pakkun.

"That was ridiculous," Kakashi sniped, despite the sweat beading on his brow from maintaining the containment field.

"And did I hear you telling 'your mama' jokes?!" Hanare snapped. "That is sophomoric. Really trashy."

Asuma shrugged. "I'll explain later," he grunted sheepishly. Looking up, the younger Sarutobi saw flares of purple bursting against the walls of the sealing trap. Hanare was trembling with exertion, and Kakashi looked well on his way to yet another extended stay in the ICU.

"Sorry it took us so long. We wanted to make sure we got the drop on that bastard," Asuma nodded up at Bison.

Kakashi grunted. "Yuki-or whoever that is-said the bridge was up."

"Oh. Well, I made the bridge fine. But I was outta smokes."

"You stopped for-"

"Just kidding, Kash. Just chill. Chill."

"Easy for you to say."

A mighty crash sounded from behind Asuma and all three ninja glanced over to see Guy standing on top of the eyepatch thug, who was lying unconscious atop a pile of wrecked bleachers. Guy saw them looking and waved. Kakashi sighed.

"Vega?" he said tiredly, arms shaking. The containment cell shuddered as Bison tested it with another blast of psychic energy. Bull licked Kakashi's face.

"Guy's ladyfriend is on it," Asuma said. As if on cue the woman in blue and Vega reappeared, falling-fighting from some high point on the stadium. They tumbled through the sky, exchanging blows. A splatter of blood fell on Asuma's shoulder and he flinched.

"Is Yuki-" Hanare squinted worriedly into the night sky. Kakashi tracked their fall. A floodlight illuminated them briefly.

"She's fine," he assured Hana.

Indeed, a split second later they were close enough that Hanare could see Yuki heel-stomp Vega's face in mid-air. She had cuts on her arms but a fierce, undaunted expression on her face. Vega had lost the rest of his mask. Yuki flipped and slapped him across his perfect cheekbones. She landed, perfectly cat-like, on the field a heartbeat before Vega and unleashed a barrage of kicks that caught the assassin in a storm of-lightning?!-as soon as his toes touched earth.

Vega crumpled to the grass in a motionless heap. Yuki stared at him for a second, wiped blood from her face… and giggled.

"I like that lightning kick…" Kakashi said.

Hanare looked from Yuki to him. "Well you don't need to like it _too_ much," she reprimanded. Kakashi grinned under his mask.

A boom from above jarred Kakashi back to business. He focused all his chakra on his seal and drew-reluctantly-on a tiny bit of Hanare's. She was down on one knee, breathing hard.

"Asuma," Kakashi said hoarsely. "Can't hold much longer…"

Guy joined, Akino, Urushi and Uhei with him. "Y-Yuki…?" The Green Beast was dumbfounded. "You're not… are you?!"

"Ssh, jumpsuit-sama. Later," the woman in blue patted his arm. "My backup should be here any second," she informed everyone. "Just try to-"

At that moment Bison broke free of the cell. The runic lines split like brittle wire as purple flame sawed outward in a rush that reminded Kakashi of Wind Release.

Purple fireballs rained down from above and they were all forced to dodge for their lives. The ninken barked and growled.

Kakashi leaped across the gap to where Hanare had fallen, and covered her with his body.

Asuma shouted something. Guy was pointing up. Yuki had a hand to her ear, her mouth moving rapidly, like she was on a com link…

Kakashi looked up. The dark sky was filled with lights too close and too uniform to be stars. There were hundreds. The whir of engines drowned out the boom of flame. Around the stadium, Kakashi could make out other lights-hundreds of pinpricks of red-all aimed at Bison…

One helicopter hovered closer. A ripped soldier in an a-shirt and camouflage pants was hanging out the door, one foot on a landing runner. He shouted through a megaphone at Bison.

"YOUR MOVE, SHADOWLOO-SER."

Yuki winced and looked embarrassed on his behalf. Hanare started giggling from underneath Kakashi. He couldn't help but smile, too.

"God, that was awful," Asuma grimaced.

"And you would know!" Guy gave him a thumbs-up.

The air crackled with tension as everyone waited to see what Bison would do. He pointed a finger slowly at the soldier, who flipped him off. Bison closed his eyes and Kakashi saw his lips move. There was a flash of blinding purple light and a force wave rippled through the armada. When the stars cleared, Bison was gone. Off in the distance Kakashi spotted a purple comet disappearing over the night horizon.

The soldier wiped sweat from his brow and motioned with his arm. The rest of the choppers gained altitude and started to disperse, filling the air with a beating whir-like a swarm of giant insects. As they departed Kakashi noted they were armed with homing missiles.

The snipers disappeared from the stadium, too. Soon there were only the arena lights and stars in the sky left. The lead helicopter lowered to the ground. Kakashi held Hanare to his chest to shield her from the draft. Guy stepped in front of Yuki to do the same, but the blue-uniformed woman reached out and shoved him out of the way as she marched straight up to the chopper.

The blades spun slowly. The pilot got out and Kakashi was surprised to see it was a man in a ragged karate gi. _What a strange group of comrades…_ he thought. Then, after glancing at Asuma and Guy, he chuckled. _I guess we're not so different._

"What's so funny," Hanare whispered, leaning against him.

"Nothing," Kakashi said, pressing his lips-through his mask-against her forehead.

"Guile! That was the slowest appearance yet! What's your explanation, soldier?!" Yuki was standing in front of the guy in camouflage, one finger jabbed into his chest. The soldier ran a hand over a horrible haircut-a high, corn-yellow flat top-and looked down at her with chagrin.

"Li-Li, c'mon-I got here as fast as I could! I had to make sure we had the firepower to squelch 'im…"

Yuki raised a fist as if to strike him, but instead she wrapped her arms around him in a hug. The soldier awkwardly hugged her back, patting her hair buns and shrugging at the karate dude pilot, who looked sternly disapproving.

"Huh. Maybe she enjoys men with strange hair…" Kakashi mused, not realizing he was speaking aloud.

Hanare giggled and tapped his nose. "I didn't see her hitting on _you._ "

"Huh?" Kakashi said. "Hey-wait, what's wrong with my hair!"

Hanare laughed.

"Vega's there, let's get 'im in the squad car. Cam's on the way, right? Good. And Balrog is in the hole." Yuki jerked a thumb. Guile nodded.

"I'll grab some paracord and the straightjacket." He went back to the chopper.

"Ryu, it's good to see you," Yuki was saying. "Sorry I'm distracted… mind grabbing Sagat from over there?" The pilot gave a silent half-smile and nodded.

Yuki finally came back over to Guy.

"Erhm," was all that came out of Guy's mouth. He cleared his throat. "Miss Yuki-"

"Officer Li, actually."

Guy blushed. And bowed. Then saluted. Then bowed. And blushed…

"Would you stop," Officer Li laughed. "You're adorable-'

Just then a squad car screeched into the arena and squealed to a stop a few feet from Vega's body. A blonde in a red beret jumped out of the driver's side and hauled Vega up with one hand. She opened the squad car door with the other and shoved the assassin inside. Vega groaned. There was the _click_ of handcuffs.

"Ready, hon," the blonde said, getting back in the car and turning up the radio.

"Asuma," Kakashi said."We should get going." There was no answer. " _Asuma_."

"Huh? Sorry, Kash- _did you see that one's a-"_

"We need to go home," Kakashi interrupted firmly. "I've seen enough of the big city."

"I haven't," Asuma grunted, still staring at the blonde in the car.

"I saw it too, Asuma, if it makes you feel any better," Pakkun said, wagging his stubby tail.

"You can all go," Kakashi said.

"Fine. Nothing interesting here at the moment anyway." Pakkun held up his paw, and he and the other ninken-who had all been licking and lounging around-vanished with _poofs_.

Officer Li was leaning down talking to Vega through the window. "You look like shit, Vega."

The assassin grinned charmingly even though one eye was swollen shut and half his face was covered in blood. "And you, Li Chun, look absolutely _ravishing_ … planning to take a shower by any chance, when you get back to HQ…?"

Officer Li snorted and threw up her hands. "Have a good time at your prison party, Vega," she laughed. Turning to Hanare, she gave a friendly salute. "You'll still get your commission. You were committed, in it all the way till the end."

Hanare, in Kakashi's arms, nodded tiredly. "I got a confession from Vega." She pulled a micro-recorder from her bra. Kakashi raised his eyebrow.

"That reminds me-" the Copy Nin looked at Officer Li, "My team took a lot of evidence from his office, as well…"

"I'll send a courier to your hotel for all of that," Li said. She glanced at Hanare again. "It was great working with you."

Hanare gave a small, slightly sad smile. "Yuki was a good friend," she said.

"So was Rei. C'mon Cammy, I really need a beer." Officer Li opened the passenger door.

"WAIT." It was Guy. "Yu… Officer! I mean. Wait, please. You see, I'm-"

"I know who you are," she winked. "Here, text me next time you're around the city." A business card twirled through the air as the woman in blue got into the car. Guy caught the card like it was the Holy Grail. The door slammed. The blonde put on some Aviators. Dream Theater blasted from the speakers. The engine roared and the squad car peeled out. Yuki was gone.

Guy clutched the card to his chest, eyes simultaneously overflowing with triple hearts and manly tears.

Guile's helicopter lifted into the air with Sagat and Balrog crammed in the backseat. The soldier with the awful 'do looked out the window and gave the wind-blown shinobi a salute. Then the chopper, too, was gone.

"Time for us to go home," Kakashi murmured into the dark. He could smell Hanare's perfume.

There was a moment of silence, then…

" _Us_?" Hanare said.


	20. Chapter 20

Kakashi had to be carried up to the hotel room. Guy did it, and Asuma followed, lending Hanare his arm to lean on. Kakashi peered around Guy's shoulder the entire way.

"I can see you watching, Kash. Don't trust me at all, eh? And here I thought we were friends." Asuma finally said as they approached the elevator. Kakashi glared back at him. Hanare hadn't been paying attention; consumed by other thoughts, she glanced up to see what Asuma was talking about. When she saw Kakashi's face peeking out from Guy's arms, she rolled her eyes. Asuma looked down at her and winked. Kakashi's eye narrowed.

Guy pushed the Up arrow with a pinky finger. After an awkwardly silent minute in which all the ninja were grateful no one else came to the lobby, the elevator doors opened. They got on and the doors slid shut. Asuma hit their floor number. The elevator started to rise. Hanare looked at Kakashi out of the corner of her eye. His half-lidded gaze was fixed on her. She frowned and stared at the mirrored wall instead.

An ad came on the elevator speaker. "Sex! Sex! Se-e-e-xxy! The city's hottest burlesque show, every night at 9 p.m. in the Pearl Ballroom. Get a free buffet voucher with your early ticket purchase!" Hanare covered her face with her hand. She could still feel Kakashi looking at her.

"It was a good buffet..." Guy murmured, a speculative look on his face.

Asuma chewed his cig. "Heard the star of that show is older than Tsunade."

Guy shrugged. "Youthfulness is a state of mind!"

"Yeah, but gravity's not," Asuma said. Guy inclined his head in consideration of the matter. Hanare felt her face getting warm. _What is wrong with me?!_ The conversation wasn't anything worse than PG-13. She peeked at Kakashi through her fingers. He looked like he wanted to die. His chest heaved in a long-suffering, silent sigh.

The elevator _dinged_.

 _Finally_ … Hanare thought. She still had to lean on Asuma for support. He was being a perfect gentleman with regards to her, but she could smell his cologne and cigarettes and it was getting on her nerves. The doors slid open and they headed toward the room. Hanare's mouth was dry. _What the hell-_ she was about fed up, with herself.

Well, and _one other_ person.

Asuma flipped the card key out of his vest and unlocked the door. Hanare glanced backward as the tanned, goateed shinobi held the door open for her. Cradled in Guy's arms, looking infantile and beat up, Kakashi of the Sharingan was still staring at her with an intensity that could melt stone. Hanare swallowed involuntarily, much to her annoyance, and stepped into the hotel room of the Konoha bachelors.

"What a day," Asuma groaned after Guy came in and he shut the door behind them. The Sarutobi stretched and headed into the bathroom. Guy carried Kakashi over to one of the beds and lay him down. Hanare perched herself on the edge of a chair. She felt bone-tired but couldn't relax.

Guy propped Kakashi's head up, and slightly elevated his swollen ankle. "I'll get you some water, Kakashi," Guy said. Kakashi glanced over at Hanare. She was staring out the sliding door… still wearing just his vest.

Kakashi reached out and grabbed Guy's wrist. "Guy, Hana needs something to wear." He nodded toward her. Asuma came out of the bathroom.

Hanare blushed. "I'm fine," she said icily. "They've seen me in a lot less than this, Kakashi."

Asuma chuckled. "Yeah, how could you forget, Kash? It was yellow. _With ruffles_." Kakashi's exposed eye gleamed dangerously. Asuma just chuckled and went out onto the balcony to smoke.

Kakashi ignored Hanare and Asuma and spoke to Guy. "In the gift shop, downstairs-"

"On it," Guy assured him. "As soon as I get your water. And take a pi-I mean, use the facilities," he looked apologetically at Hanare. She smiled graciously to let him know it was all fine. _He really is a sweet friend to Kakashi_ , Hanare thought.

Guy brought Kakashi's water and made him drink it. Hanare made a point of not looking at his face with the mask pulled down. She shifted on the chair. The fake leather was sticking to her buttocks. _Shower. Tequila_. Hanare wished she was stronger. She'd of gone back to her apartment already. There was absolutely no point in being here.

"You should ice that," she heard herself say. It was a surprise. Guy looked at her and then at Kakashi's ankle.

"Of course," he said amicably. "I'll get some ice before I go downstairs." Hanare nodded. Kakashi was looking at her again, hair splayed in dishevelled silver whorls on the pillow. His shirt was rumpled and torn, as were his leg bandages.

Guy left the room to get ice. Hanare watched Asuma smoking on the balcony. Kakashi motioned her to come over to the bed. She pretended not to notice.

"Hana," Kakashi said. The green-haired kunoichi closed her eyes in irritation and refused to look at him even when she answered.

"Yes, Kakashi?"

There was a long pause. Finally, he raised an eyebrow. "You're wearing the necklace I bought you," he said triumphantly.

Asuma came back inside.

" _Kenta_ got this for me," Hanare snapped. "And he can have it back." She unclasped the golden leaf and set it on the table.

"So that's where my winnings went, eh?" Asuma grunted, eyeing the piece of jewelry. "Huh. Nice item." He went over to the minibar.

Kakashi's cheeks were pink. Hanare was amused. "Bank of Asuma, huh?" she said, examining a broken nail.

The Copy Ninja was silent a moment. "Hana, I-" he began.

"And since when do you call me _Hana_?!" Hanare said. Her voice was sharp. Kakashi was quiet.

"He calls you that all the time around here," Asuma laughed, cracking the tiny scotch he'd procured from the minibar.

A kunai _zinged_ through the air. Asuma leaned back slightly and it lodged harmlessly in the wall. Kakashi's wrist relaxed down again, just as Guy reentered the room, holding the ice bucket.

"You're lucky I'm injured," Kakashi growled at Asuma.

" _You're_ lucky you're injured," Asuma growled back.

Guy stepped daintily forward. "Eh

… Hanare…" he set the ice on the table.

"Yes, Guy?" Hanare said with earnest respect.

"Would you mind… seeing to this-" he gestured in a way that vaguely encompassed all of Kakashi. "I'm taking Asuma down with me. We'll get some coffee and stop at the boutique like Kakashi wanted, and everyone will feel better."

Hanare was surprised. She looked hesitantly at the injured man in the bed. Guy cleared his throat. "Ah, it _is_ partially your fault, Miss Hanare…" She turned angrily at him. Guy held up one hand placatingly, the other in a futile attempt to cover his loud whisper. "I think we can all agree his execution was off, but I can assure you, my Eternal Rival's intentions were nothing but pure-"

" _I can hear you, Guy_ ," Kakashi said acidly from his prone position. Hanare looked dubious.

"Please, Hanare-just patch him up a bit. I'll be right back," Guy's pleading, sparklingly white grin could not be denied. Hanare's chin dipped, just once, in a firm yet none-too-happy nod.

"Thank you!" Guy beamed. He grabbed Asuma by the shoulder. "And you keep your mouth shut," he muttered, hauling the Sarutobi out.

"Was just havin' a little fun…" Asuma's mumble trailed off and then was cut completely by the heavy _fwoomp_ of the door closing.

Hanare and Kakashi were finally alone… together.

"Well," Kakashi said. "Aren't you going to start fixing me up?"

Hanare's eyes narrowed and their usual light brown changed to a glinting cognac. "I'd have to know _what was wrong with you_ in order to attempt to fix it, and honestly I have _no idea_ ," she said, each word edged.

Kakashi looked wounded. "I think it's a fractured ankle," he said innocently.

Hanare rolled her eyes. She looked at the ice bucket. Kakashi shifted in bed and groaned. Hanare's stare was anything but sympathetic. Finally, sighing, she reached out and grabbed the ice bucket. She peered into it, then got up and rummaged in the drawers. Finding what she needed, she came over to the end of the bed and emptied the contents of the bucket, creating a makeshift ice pack using a clean garbage can liner.

Kakashi tried not to stare at the bare curves of her breasts beneath the Konoha vest. The zipper was undone and her skin looked soft against the black lingerie. Her hair was out of place and mussed, but Kakashi thought it only made her look better… like she'd just gotten out of be-

"What?" Hanare's voice sliced the air. She had looked up and caught him staring. He widened his sleepy eyes into a more chaste expression.

"You're hurt," he said, nodding at a minor cut on her arm.

Hanare glanced down peevishly and shrugged. "It's nothing! Probably from when I fell." She returned her attention to his ankle. After staring at it a moment she announced, "I'm going to unwrap your leg. I'll check the fracture and rewrap it if necessary... It's going to hurt."

Kakashi smiled under his mask while she wasn't looking. When she raised a brow at him for confirmation, he merely gave a tired nod; all business.

Hanare sat down at the edge of the bed. She started to gently remove his leg wraps, cutting with a kunai when necessary. Kakashi could see her thong underwear peeking out from beneath the edge of the vest. After a moment he decided he should look somewhere else, and concentrated studiously on a pile of Guy's used briefs in the corner of the room.

Hanare worked quickly, unwrapping his leg with efficient movements. The air felt good on Kakashi's skin. _I wonder if she's done this for anyone else…_ Kakashi scoffed at himself. Of course she would have-she was a kunoichi, after all. She pulled the last wrap free of his upper calf and the slight movement made his ankle throb. Kakashi inhaled sharply and Hanare winced. "Sorry," she said, looking over her shoulder at him.

"It's fine," he said reassuringly.

She turned back to examining his ankle. He felt her fingertips lightly trace the bones of his foot and the tender area above. She leaned over, looking closely, as her touch made his skin burn… and not from pain.

"Doesn't look good. You'll be on crutches for awhile," she pronounced.

"Damn," Kakashi said. He hated crutches.

Hanare got up and went to the bathroom. He heard the water running. She came back a minute later and started gently wiping down his lower leg and foot with a cool cloth. Kakashi closed his eyes. It felt… so good… Just to be able to rest, with someone he admired taking care of him…

Kakashi jerked awake What was going on…?! Purple fire-no, Rin! Hanare… He looked around frantically. Pain shot up his leg.

"Kakashi! Kakashi, it's alright. You dozed off. Stop moving! It's alright-I'm here…" Hanare's hands were on his leg. She was tucking in the end of the wrap…

"Hanare?" Kakashi said, feeling the old terror that set his heart thudding and brought shameful tears to his eyes. She turned and looked at him. Surprise registered on her face.

"Oh, Kakashi…" she said softly. She seemed to hesitate, but then carefully settled his injured leg back down on its cushion and turned. Kakashi blinked. She was crawling up the bed toward him…

"Was this your plan all along, Kenta?" she chided, pulling down his mask slowly. Kakashi raised his eyes to her face, desiring her touch so badly yet not wanting to appear _too_ pervy…

"You're a naughty ninja," Hanare giggled. She could be so hard-and then, so silly. One graceful finger extended and tapped him on the nose. Kakashi caught her wrist in his hand and pressed his lips to her palm. Her skin smelled like vanilla and steel, from the kunai...

Pulling carefully as though she might break-or bolt-Kakashi guided Hanare onto his lap until she was straddling him. Kakashi sighed. The pressure and warmth from her thighs felt so good. He didn't even think twice about his injury…

"Hana," he said gently. He slid his hands up her strong yet soft arms, enjoying how beautiful she looked above him. Her hair looked rich and silky, her eyes sparkled just for him. The beauty mark on the right side reminded him of the day he'd accidentally kissed her. The memory brought a smile to his face.

Hanare leaned down and kissed him deeply. Her hands touched his face and tangled in his hair… wanting, desiring, pulling him closer. Kakashi groaned into the softness of her lips, and felt himself starting to get hard beneath her…

"Kakashi."

Hanare was so warm, so perfect, for him…

"Kakashi?"

...And so difficult. Such a challenge…

"Um. _Kakashi."_

Kakashi blinked rapidly. Someone was shaking his shoulder. He saw a flicker of green hair and started to smile, breathing in deeply of her fragrance. _Oh, it's just Hana-_ he lifted a hand toward her neck. _Where were we? Must've been interrupted…_

" _Ahem._ Kakashi! Kakashi, wake up."

Kakashi startled. The voice wasn't welcoming or flirtatious, but it was definitely Hanare's. The Copy Ninja leaned back and let his vision focus on her face. Her expression wasn't welcoming or flirtatious, either-it was stony and vexed.

 _Uh oh_ …

"You fell asleep while I was wrapping your leg," she said curtly. She stood next to the bed. Kakashi felt a lingering tingle around his crotch and saw-with horror-out of the corner of his eye that he was half erect. The man who copied a thousand jutsus looked intently toward the balcony.

"Did you hear that?!" he said. Hanare whipped around, body tense and ready for action. Kakashi snatched a pillow and slammed it on top of his torso, clutching it like a stuffed animal.

"I… don't see anything-" Hanare said cautiously. "But that doesn't mean much. What did you hear?" She sounded truly anxious and Kakashi felt a throb of guilt.

"It must've been a cicada or something flying into the glass. Sorry, I'm a little jumpy I guess." The lie slid easily from Kakashi's tongue and Hanare turned back around, still nervous but at least not ready to stab something. She looked at the pillow in his arms.

"Uh, got a bit cold," he lied again. Hanare frowned slightly. She said nothing and went over to the other bed and pulled off the comforter. She brought it over and tucked it around him like he was a kid.

"Have you ever done this for anyone else?" Kakashi was mortified to hear himself blurt the question that had crossed his mind earlier. He bit his tongue under his mask and stared at Hanare, playing it off with a stoic expression. She gave him a look.

Then she shrugged. "You mean, care for a wounded comrade?" Kakashi thought he heard a slight pause before "comrade"-but he also could be imagining things. He nodded.

"Not… exactly," she said after thinking a moment. Oddly, she started moving about, tidying the hotel room while she spoke. "Medical doesn't come up often in my line of work. I'm usually on the job alone, and if someone's in a bad way it's because I wanted them to be."

Kakashi raised his eyebrows. Hanare was folding shirts they'd just slung over the chairs. He felt guilty again. "I used to help fix up Grandpa Lock and some of the Grannies after they came back from missions, though." She hung up Asuma's leather jacket in the closet. Kakashi wished it was his vest instead… but she was wearing that, and it wasn't covering her ass when she reached up for the hanger…

She was looking at him again. Kakashi nodded sagely with a bored expression on his face. She seemed comfortable with that and kept talking. "As I got older… seemed like Grandpa Lock would come up to have me tend to some bullshit injuries. Like thorn scratches, twisted ankles… things he could obviously take care of himself."

She made the other bed, fluffing the pillows and shaking out the sheets before tucking them under the mattress.

"I was a teenager. And honestly it kind of creeped me out and I got suspicious. I didn't want to touch his liver-spotted skin any more than I had to."

Hanare smoothed the sheets. Kakashi frowned at her story. She spoke very matter-of-factly on it, but it certainly wasn't alright. "What did you do," Kakashi said.

A small smile crossed Hanare's face. "I waited till he came in with some suitable problem. Then, I hurt him."

Kakashi was silent.

Hanare chuckled. "He said he had a sprained _groin muscle._ Can you believe that nerve?" she shook her head. "I pretended to be so good-natured, so _sweet_ about having to massage it for him. Then-oopsie!-turns out I was _horrible_ at massage. Gramps couldn't walk for a week." Hanare snickered as she arranged the Konoha bachelors' shoes in neat rows by the door.

"I… I'm sorry," was all Kakashi could think of to say.

"Ha! Be glad _you_ only had an ankle fracture," Hanare said with a wink. Kakashi looked at her. She glanced away and picked up a pair of socks off the floor. "It's ok," she said softly. "We only do what we have to do, right, Kakash-"

The door swung open.

"Voila!" shouted Guy, holding up a pair of booty shorts that said "Lush Vegas" across the butt, in rhinestones.

Asuma was right behind, balancing a drink tray of coffee in one hand and holding a bouquet of partially wilted roses in the other. "Who wants an… Orange Mocha Frappucino?!" he sang out. Kakashi swore in his head, but Hanare giggled. She seemed amused, and for that Kakashi was very grateful to his friends.


	21. Chapter 21

The coffee party turned into a late-night mission meeting… the absolute _last_ thing in the world Kakashi wanted. Asuma and Guy were debating minutiae, and they were all wondering when Officer Li's courier would show up.

Hanare was standing, staring out the sliding glass doors. She wore the outfit Guy had bought-a flimsy, pale pink shorts-and-top set-and Kakashi again cringed at his best friend's abominable sartorial instincts. Cheap plastic jewels sparkled across the butt of the short-shorts, and the top was low cut and also tied in the front-barely more decent than what Hanare had on before… which was just her underwear and a Konoha vest. Kakashi had _seen_ other, more elegant items in the gift shop when they'd first checked in, so it wasn't like Guy hadn't had any options… Kakashi was sure there'd been a long black shawl-coverup thing on one rack… and hadn't there been some kind of sundress near the sunglasses...

Kakashi stared at Hanare's legs while Guy debated Asuma on whether the events of the trip required the filing of a mission report. Kakashi was trying to say as little as possible so the conversation would be over as soon as possible. Hanare seemed distracted. The shorts barely covered her butt. The long expanse of skin down her thighs was hard to ignore.

"What do you think, Kakashi?" Guy said.

"Huh?" Kakashi looked at his friends.

"He wasn't even listening," Asuma grumbled. The coffees were almost gone and everyone was exhausted. "We have to make a decision here, Kash!" Asuma rapped his knuckles on the table impatiently.

There was a knock on the door.

"Got it," Guy said. He hopped up. "Yeah?" he said without opening the door.

"Are you jumpsuit-sama? Officer Li sent me."

Guy checked the peephole and opened up. It was the blonde from the squad car but now she was dressed in a business suit. She came in and looked around, nonplussed.

"One sec," Guy said. He went to grab the files they'd prepped.

"Hi," Asuma said to the blonde. Kakashi covered his face with one hand. The agent looked Asuma up and down and smirked. She didn't reply.

"Here you go." Guy handed over the parcel of evidence and bowed politely. "Please convey my respects to Officer Li," he said, very formal.

"Sure," the agent said. She headed for the door. "Your fly's down," she called to Asuma, just before the door slammed shut.

"Wha-" Asuma glanced at his pants. "Aw, hell," he muttered, zipping up.

"Hanare," Kakashi said. She hadn't even moved a muscle when the courier came in.

"I need to go home," the green-haired kunoichi said to the sliding doors.

"Yes," Kakashi said. "But, it's late. You can stay here and go back in the-"

"Absolutely not. You must be some kind of fool," Hanare said, without turning around. She laughed, and it bounced harshly off the glass.

Kakashi fell silent. Guy and Asuma looked at each other and then at Kakashi. He braced his hands on the bed, started to push himself up…

"Now Kash-" Asuma lifted a hand.

"Kakashi, perhaps it's best to let everyone just-" Guy moved toward his rival's path.

"Hana!" Kakashi said.

She slid open the glass door.

"Hanare!" Kakashi cried, shoving Guy aside. The taijitsu master crashed into Asuma and the table fell over.

Hanare was leaning back against the balcony railing. "I'm sorry, Kakashi," she said.

Kakashi lunged toward her, putting his weight accidentally on his bad ankle. He stumbled hard, but reached out for Hanare…. the breeze lifted a strand of her hair and blew it across her face…

"Hana, no!"

She slipped backward over the railing. Kakashi scrambled across the concrete on his knees and dragged himself up, peering over the rail and scanning the street desperately.

Night lights and sounds of traffic mocked him. There was no sign of Hanare or which way she went. A hint of vanilla hung in the air. She was gone. _Just like before..._

Strong hands grabbed Kakashi from behind, latching onto his shoulders and pulling him back. Kakashi didn't struggle. Someone held his leg up so he didn't further aggravate his ankle. Somehow he ended up back in the bed.

"She didn't want to stay." Kakashi stared at his hands, scratched and bloody, atop the white coverlet.

Asuma cleared his throat. "Kash, look… sometimes it just doesn't work out, you know?"

Guy sat with his hands folded under his chin. Asuma went into the bathroom and shut the door. The shower turned on.

"Kakashi," Guy said gently. "Let's get some rest. Things might look different… tomorrow." He reached out and patted Kakashi's shoulder. The silver-haired ninja didn't answer.

"Just relax. We'll have a nice drive back to Konoha, and Tsunade will no doubt be pleased at our unplanned-yet-pivotal role in preventing this international incident." Guy got up, and turned off the overhead light. He turned and gave Kakashi a huge, grinning thumbs-up… but the Copy Ninja was leaning back on his pillow like he'd never get up again, staring out the glass doors into the unsympathetic night.

…

The car was packed and everything was ready. Kakashi was tied up securely and chained into the back seat, Asuma was in the driver's seat with a fresh pack of smokes, and Guy was tipping the bellhop. It was a beautiful, sunny day in the city, a mere 24 hours after their original planned return date.

"All set," Guy smiled. The porters returned his thumbs-up (he was a generous tipper) and Asuma started the car. Guy got in the passenger side.

As they pulled out of the parking lot, Asuma glanced in the rearview mirror to make sure Kakashi was still in place. The silver-haired shinobi looked bored and irritated, but at least he was behaving. Asuma shrugged at him. "Dude, we tried. At least it was a _memorable_ birthday, right?" Kakashi didn't answer. He looked crossly out the window.

"Fine. Be an assbag," Asuma muttered. He turned the car onto the freeway onramp. Guy was munching a handful of dango sticks.

"I fully plan on calling Yuki-I mean Officer Li-next time we visit!" Guy declared.

"You do that," Asuma grunted.

"It would be rude of me not to, after she gave me her card. Obviously a token of affection, and probably a sign of romantic interes-"

"Hey, you never found the Hello Kitty, or what?" Asuma interrupted. The car merged onto the freeway.

Guy shook his head. "I thought it was in the trunk, or closet…"

"Dang. Was gonna give that to Kurenai when we got back, if Kash didn't want it."

"I'm sure one of the truck stops will have something equally as tacky you can buy for Kurenai, Asuma!" Guy reassured him.

"True," Asuma puffed. He checked the rearview again. Kakashi had dozed off already. Guy cracked the window to get some desert air. Asuma turned on the radio. It was the Eagles. He cranked it up, and thought of Kurenai as they headed for home.

…

"Hello, Hanare."

The green-haired woman on the lanai screamed and jumped, tipping over her lounge chair and dropping her cocktail glass. It shattered, the pigeons flew away, and the man looking up at the apartment held up a gigantic Hello Kitty for the woman's inspection.

"I brought you something."

Hanare blinked. She breathed in deep and held it, trying to force reality to succumb to her will instead of being as ridiculous as it actually was. It didn't work. The man- _that man_ -was still down there on the sidewalk. He was still holding up a 5-foot-tall Sanrio toy like some kind of half-hearted sacrificial offering… there was broken glass on her lanai, she'd just spilled an expensive pour of whiskey and there was pigeon poop on her sandal. She expelled the air from her lungs. And glared down at the man on the sidewalk.

"Kakashi!" she hissed. "What are you doing here?! And-" she looked at his leg. "How are you walking already? You should be on crutches!"

One dark eye slid to the side. When it slid back to looking at her, the man said, "Officer Li sent someone to the hotel this morning. Some kind of yogi. A healer. My ankle's not 100%, but good enough…" he squinted up at her lanai. "...Are you drinking already? Isn't it a bit early for that?"

Hanare's cheeks went pink. "It's five o'clock somewhere," she snapped.

"I hate country music," Kakashi said in a monotone. He stood casually as people walked around him on the sidewalk, taking in his surroundings like it was totally normal for a masked man to be hugging a giant stuffed animal in the middle of the morning on a Tuesday.

Hanare glowered at him through the bars of her apartment balcony.

"Is this when you invite me up?" Kakashi said after a while. Hanare's mouth fell open. _The nerve…_ But he was looking up at her with an earnest expression. Hanare hesitated.

"You look beautiful," Kakashi called. A few passerby heard him and turned to see what he was talking about. Hanare felt herself blushing harder. Two men holding hands giggled at her plight as they walked by. One flashed her a thumbs up. Hanare slapped a hand to her forehead.

"Fine," she said.

"What was that?" Kakashi said, turning an ear toward her.

"I said _fine_ , you can come up. But only after you tell me why you're here."

"Sure," Kakashi said, staring at her sleepily. "I'm here to take you out."

Hanare was surprised. "...Out?" Her voice was higher than she would've liked.

Kakashi nodded. She looked at him. He was wearing civilian clothes: tight grayish-black jeans, gray sneakers and a black fitted v-neck shirt. He had his mask on, but no forehead protector. Just a simple black bandana he'd tied over his left eye.

Hanare swallowed. It was… a good look on him. Running her fingers through her long bangs that had come loose from her braid, she leaned over the railing of the lanai. "Alright. It's 304. I'll buzz you in." Kakashi nodded and walked unhurriedly over to the building entrance. He and the Hello Kitty disappeared from sight beneath the awning. Hanare tiptoed around the broken glass and scrambled into her apartment to get the buzzer.

 _Zzzz. Zzzz._ She pushed the button.

"Hi, it's me, Kakashi."

Hanare started to laugh. "Yes, I know…" she hit the button again. "Just come up."

A quick glance around the apartment told Hanare it was unfit for company. She ran around in a whirlwind, scooping up clothes and dirty dishes and a couple _adult_ items and shoved the entire armful of stuff into the storage closet. Then she flicked on the stereo and opened the window. Her purse was on the table and she rummaged for her lip gloss-she managed a swipe just as a knock sounded on her door.

Hanare adjusted the straps of her dress and smoothed her hair. She took a deep breath, exhaled, and opened the door.

"Hi. It's me." Kakashi stood on the other side of the threshold, the mammoth doll on his hip and an unreadable expression on his face.

"Yes… I know." Hanare said, stepping back to allow him to enter.

"You look beautiful," he said, just staring at her.

"Yeah. You said that." Hanare felt annoyed but blushed anyway. She looked away. "Thank you," she said. "Come in," she gestured. Kakashi nodded and stepped inside.

"Make… yourself… comfortable," Hanare said to Kakashi's back, wincing at how awkward it felt. She shut the door and scurried past him into the kitchen.

She took out a teapot and two cups and started filling the pot with water. She listened keenly for sounds of what Kakashi might be doing in the sitting room.

"Hi. Need help?" The voice came from right next to her. Hanare jumped and almost dropped the teapot. Kakashi caught it. He still had the Hello Kitty in the other hand. He'd followed her into the kitchen...

"Okay-" Hanare felt her heart racing. Kakashi was standing too close and he smelled nice. "Do you need something to do? Go put that doll down somewhere-my couch is fine. Then grab the broom for me. I have to clean up the mess I made on the lanai. The broom is in the closet next to the door."

The teapot was going. Kakashi nodded and disappeared from the kitchen. Hanare exhaled and took out a plate. She went to a different cupboard and dug around for some kind of snack… _damn, I knew I shouldn'tve put off going to the market…_ She found a package of coconut crackers and was tearing them open when a _crash_ came from the other room.

Kakashi's head poked around the corner. Hanare frowned. "Hana-Hanare, I mean... There were some… other things, in the closet?" Hanare tilted her head, trying to figure what he meant-

 _Oh, no…_ A wave of mortification washed over Hanare. She shoved the plate of cookies at Kakashi. "Coconut cracker?" she chirped, before maneuvering past him into the living room.

It was as bad as she feared. All the hidden items had tumbled out of the closet when he opened it to look for the broom. _How could I be this stupid?! I just put these in here not five minutes ago-_ Hanare ran around snatching things off the floor.

Kakashi came out of the kitchen and set the plate on the table. He reached down to pick up something by his foot. There was a slap on his wrist. Hanare had zipped over and grabbed the item out from under his fingers. "Thanks but I've got this just fine!" Hanare breezed. Kakashi straightened and reached back to scratch his head. The thing had been a little egg- shaped trinket… was it Easter already?

Hanare ran into what Kakashi presumed was the bedroom, carrying an armload of stuff. She reappeared, breathless, and shut the door behind her firmly. "There's the broom!" she smiled, pointing at the last item left in the closet.

Kakashi retrieved it. "What was it you needed swept?" he asked. Hanare tried to take the broom from him.

"I can do it," Kakashi said, not letting go. Hanare opened her mouth to argue. "You go get the tea," he said.

"Oh… okay," Hanare said. "It's the… I broke a glass, when you showed up. It surprised me."

"Sorry," he said, and his exposed eye crinkled slightly at the corner.

"It's… fine," Hanare shrugged. "Alright. I'll check on the tea." She hesitated then turned and headed to the kitchen. Kakashi watched her. She had her hair pulled off to the side in a braid, and he could see her back between the straps of her light blue dress. It was a very different look than at Pink Paradise.

He turned and went out onto the little balcony where Hanare had been sitting when he found her. It overlooked the street, and had just enough space for a chair, tiny table, and a lone potted plant in one corner. The yellow lounge chair was tipped over on its side and broken glass sparkled on the concrete of the lanai. A strong smoky smell came from the wet spots of spilled liquor. _She must've been drinking some of that scotch stuff Asuma's always got around…_ Kakashi mused as he knelt to right the chair and start cleaning up.

 _Oh yeah, I wonder how Asuma and Guy are doing, anyway…_

…

The truck stop came into view and Asuma veered into a parking space.

"Nothing more youthful than emptying a full bladder," Guy grinned, rubbing his hands together in anticipation.

"Yeah. Gotta piss like a racehorse," Asuma muttered, turning off the engine. "And pick up more cigs." He turned around to check on Kakashi in the backseat.

"Need anything?" Asuma asked gruffly.

Kakashi flipped him off, and then _poofed_ out of existence.

"What the-" Asuma shouted, cigarette dropping from his lips. "Hey! You-damn it Hatake, you sneaky bastard!"

"I guess his youthful feelings for Miss Hanare were too much to overcome," Guy said wistfully, thinking of Yuki.

"Well fuck it, I'm going back to Konoha," Asuma grumbled. He brushed ash off his shorts. "Cassanova can fend for himself. Put on his big boy ninja pants for once."

"He should be in no danger," Guy reasoned. "All he needs to do is relax and be himself."

Asuma looked at him skeptically.

"Well," Guy amended. "Aside from the porn reading, the condescending tone, the laconic nature, elitist attitude, standoffish vibes he gives… oh and the penchant for lateness, the patronizing and sometimes chauvinistic comments, the creepy sneakiness, the self-centered tendency…" Guy paused and scratched his chin. "Hmm… this might be one of Kakashi's most challenging battles yet!"

Asuma laughed. "C'mon. Let's see if this place has deep fried Twinkies."

"I'll settle for toilet paper in the bathroom," Guy said optimistically.

"Check out that trucker hat in the window. Wouldn't Kurenai look cute…"

The shinobi ambled toward the truck stop, enjoying their freedom before returning to the hidden village grind.

…

"So… that's it then?" Hanare frowned across the table at Kakashi, a half-eaten coconut biscuit in her hand.

The masked, silver-haired man nodded. There were crumbs on the plate in front of him yet Hanare hadn't actually seen him eat a thing…

"You came all the way here to tell me that?"

Kakashi nodded again, his sleepy gaze fixed on her face.

"How did you find me, anyway?"

"Tax records at Paradise."

"You were at the club? Did you see any of the girls?"

"Just Bonnie. She's buying it, you know."

"What?!"

"I think Officer Li works very fast. Now that she has what she needs with regards to Vega, the club is just a liability to get handled as soon as possible."

"I didn't know Bonnie was that loaded…" Hanare stared out the window as she thoughtfully took a bite of cracker.

"She said her family's in business, in Texas." Kakashi watched Hanare's eyebrows shoot up. The movement made the beauty mark under her eye jump. It was cute.

"Barbie will be Manager."

"That's a good choice," Hanare looked far away. Kakashi could almost see the gears turning in her head. He reached out and put his hand cautiously over hers. She looked down, startled.

"Hana- _Rei,_ " Kakashi said. "It's taken care of. The girls will be fine. The club is fine. It's over. The mission is finished. You don't need to be there anymore… if you don't want to, I mean."

"Well…" Hanare said, drawing her hand away from his and twisting the end of her braid, "It's just that… I don't have much to do, if I'm not there. It was a long cover, and I wasn't really expecting to get invested, but… those are my friends," she said softly. "My… my only friends, really."

"What about me?" Kakashi said. Hanare looked up at him with a dubious quirk of her eyebrow. Kakashi chuckled. "What about my proposal? You still haven't given me an answer." He leaned back and crossed his arms, fixing her with his intense "battle-eye"... but inside, his stomach felt like it was lurching around on a rough sea and his heart fluttered erratically.

Hanare sighed. "So let me get this straight. You're proposing that today, we go out on a date. Like an actual _date_. And depending on how that goes, I get to decide what happens next… whether that means _more_ , or if I never want to see you again my life. Or anything in between. And you'll respect and abide by my decision on that, no matter what my decision is."

Kakashi swallowed imperceptibly. He nodded with confidence.

Hanare gave him a suspicious look. "You barely know me, Kakashi. What if _you_ don't want anything to do with _me_ after this date? And what if I were to want more…" she trailed off, shaking her head.

"It's too risky," she said. "We should just stop now-"

Kakashi got up from the table and started walking towards the door.

"Kakashi…" Hanare whispered.

"I'm taking you out," he said, without looking back. "Be ready at three."

Hanare's jaw dropped. "Hey!" she said, jumping to her feet with a glare. "You said you'd respect my decision about-"

"...about the _results_ of the date," Kakashi said, opening the door. "I never said anything about you getting to decide if we go on the date in the first place."

Hanare was stunned. "B-but you came here to _ask_ me if I'd agree to-"

"A ninja must see through deception," Kakashi said with a shrug. "See you in a couple hours." The door shut in Hanare's face.

"Why that-" The green-haired kunoichi stomped her foot and fumed, eyes narrowed into dangerous slits. _I'll show him who's in control! I'll just disappear-_

The door opened. Kakashi's head poked through the crack. "And don't try to run, Hanare," he said tiredly but sternly, his visible eye glinting onyx. "You know I've got this whole building trapped and under surveillance already. Plus multiple perimeters set around the neighborhood."

Hanare's mouth fell open. Again.

"Until three, then!" Kakashi said cheerfully, his eyes squinted into happy arcs as he flashed her the peace sign.

Then the door slammed in her face. Again.

"AAARGH!" Hanare gritted her teeth and shook her fist at the closed door. _Unbelievable!_ That Kakashi would take the time and go through the trouble of coming to ask her permission… and then, completely disregard her preferences… Hanare spun and found herself face to face with the giant Hello Kitty on her couch.

"Accomplice!" she accused the doll, giving it a roundhouse kick to the whiskers. The cat toppled to the floor and looked perkily up at her. Hanare sighed. She picked up the kitty-it was nearly as tall as she was-and carried it toward the bedroom. She glanced at the clock. _11:52…_ Just a hair over three hours until the damnable date…

Hanare pushed open the bedroom door. All the contraband from the closet was strewn on the bed and Hanare groaned anew in embarrassment at the earlier debacle. She couldn't believe Kakashi hadn't left right then. Irritably the kunoichi swept her arm across the bed and cleared the dirty clothes, half-open candy boxes, _Playgirl_ magazine and a couple intimate toys onto the floor on the far side of the bed. _Stupid me_ she swore in her head.

She put Hello Kitty on the bed in place of the other junk. The clock on the nightstand read 12:00 p.m. _Three hours until 3…_

"Well you might as well make yourself useful," Hanare said to gigantic stuffed cat. "You can help me decide what to wear."


	22. Chapter 22

The clock said 2:57.

Hanare was sitting on the couch with her legs crossed, jiggling her foot up and down.

 _2:58_ …

She looked out toward her lanai at the late afternoon sun. _What if he doesn't show up_. A thousand scenarios raced through her mind as to why he might not…

 _2:59_

Hanare touched her hair and flicked lint off her skirt. She bit her lip. A pigeon flew by the window.

 _3:00_

Hanare tensed. She listened, kunoichi senses tingling, for any signs of the silver-haired shinobi. You never could be sure how a ninja might show up…

 _3:01_

There was nothing. _Well it's only been a minute_ Hanare reasoned. _I shouldn't be so paranoid._ But a little voice inside reproached her for trying to deny him this date in the first place. _Coward!_ the voice accused. _You've been in love with him forever, but now you're terrified of getting too close to anyone! You basically rejected him earlier. Kakashi Hatake, your ultimate crush. And now he's going to no-show to get you back…_

Hanare cringed and grimaced. Her inner monologue was brutal, as usual. She glanced at the clock.

 _3:07_

"This is ridiculous," Hanare declared. She stood up. _It's only been a few minutes. I'll just do something to keep busy…_ The green-haired kunoichi marched into the kitchen.

After emptying the dishwasher, cleaning out the fridge, dusting, and reorganizing her bookshelf, Hanare checked the clock.

 _3:34_

She blinked. It felt like someone had dropped a huge stone into her stomach. She put a hand out and steadied herself on the doorframe. _Half an hour? Could there be some mistake?_

Hanare slowly turned and went to the fridge. She opened the door and let the cool air flow over her face. _It's really going to happen. I'm going to get stood up by Kakashi Hatake._ Hanare reached a trembling hand into the fridge and rummaged for the little bottle of sake she knew was hiding in the back. Her fingers closed around the neck. She tried not to think about anything as she cracked the seal on the lid but her eyes teared up anyway. _What did you expect_ the pesky voice said. Hanare squatted in the shelter of the open fridge and put the sake bottle to her lips, closing her eyes against the emptiness. The nigori sake was sweet on her tongue. _I wonder what it would've been like… to kiss him…_

"Hi."

Hanare choked as sake went down her windpipe. She dropped the bottle and coughed violently, stumbling as she tried to stand up. A firm hand caught her by the elbow. Hanare twisted away and leaned over the sink, spitting sake and clearing her throat.

"Sorry about that," Kakashi said. Hanare gripped the counter white-knuckled. She didn't look up. She heard Kakashi pick up the sake bottle off the floor and close the fridge. She tried to take a deep breath but found that inside she was seething and all she could do was grit her teeth.

"Sorry I'm late," Kakashi was saying. "I…" He seemed about to say something else but trailed off and fell silent. Hanare still couldn't look at him. She eyed the clock on the coffee maker. _3:46?!_

"You're. Late," Hanare finally managed to hiss out. She picked up a dishrag and wiped imaginary spots off the counter, avoiding eye contact.

Kakashi hesitated. He had no idea what to do. He was still a little out of breath from racing across the city to her apartment, after everything was arranged. He didn't want to look desperate, though, so he tried to calm his breathing and act natural. He ran a hand through his hair.

"I'm… I'm always late," he finally said. He couldn't think of what else to say and it was true. Except usually it was for some bullshit reason simply because he didn't want to be somewhere. This time, however… _Karma,_ he thought with chagrin.

"Oh really?" Hanare said in a strange, detached voice. She wouldn't look at him, and he could practically feel the waves of anger rolling off of her. _Was I really that…_ Kakashi glanced at the clock. _3:50. Damn. I guess so_.

"Hana," Kakashi said. "Stop cleaning," he ordered, suddenly irritated that she wouldn't even look at him. She raised an eyebrow and tightened her hold on the dishrag.

"It's my apartment. I can clean if I want to," she retorted, staring at the sink. "How did you get in here, anyway?!"

"The balcony," Kakashi said sheepishly. "I was… in a rush."

Hanare sighed. Her eyes rolled skyward in an exaggerated way that was both adorable and infuriating. She turned away and started doing something with the toaster. Kakashi glowered but couldn't help but notice how lovely she looked. _Well I guess I can still look at her, even if she is angry with me…_ She was wearing another light blue dress, but this one was long-sleeved and form fitting; showing all her curves. There was a little gap between the top and the skirt, where Kakashi could see a sliver of skin at her waist. He wanted to touch it, but figured it wasn't the best time. The Sharingan Warrior stuffed his hands deep into the pockets of his jeans.

Earlier Hanare had her hair in a braid, but now it was down and loose, mostly straight, making a long green river down her back. There were two little gold clips on either side of her face, holding the emerald locks back in a very pretty way. Kakashi's fingers touched something in his right pocket.

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot," he said. "I brought you something." He drew his hand out of his pocket and held it out to her. Hanare paused in her examination of the toaster.

"What is it," she said tersely, her back still toward him.

"Kenta said you left this at his place," Kakashi quipped, his impatience making him snarky. Hanare turned around slowly, a deadly gleam in her eyes. Kakashi made a cheesy smiley-eye face at her. Hanare looked at his hand. The golden leaf charm sparkled on its chain.

"Bank of Asuma," Hanare muttered, plucking the necklace from Kakashi's palm.

"I got the Hello Kitty courtesy Asuma, too," Kakashi said. Hanare side-eyed him while she put on the necklace. "Actually, Asuma got it for me for my birthday weekend. Then I gave it to you. So technically that's a re-gift."

Hanare glared. Then she stopped, halfway to putting on the necklace. "Wait-your birthday weekend? You mean _this_ weekend?"

Kakashi nodded. "It was Saturday," he shrugged.

Hanare thought a moment, then blushed a little. "Happy belated birthday," she said. Then she added in a mumble, "Guess I should've pulled _you_ up on stage…"

Kakashi shrugged again. "You can always make it up to me later."

Hanare turned red. She was still trying to fasten the necklace. "Do you need help with that?" Kakashi asked. He didn't wait for an answer. He walked across the kitchen and took the chain from Hanare. She glanced up but didn't protest. Kakashi held the necklace while she reached up and lifted her hair out of the way, exposing the smooth skin at the nape of her neck. Kakashi swallowed. He did the clasp and stepped back. Hanare released her hair and turned to face him.

"Shall we?" he said, something he was pretty sure he'd heard the _Icha_ protagonist say in the made-for-TV-special.

"Fine," Hanare sighed.

Kakashi's eye crinkled at the corner.

…

"Where are we going?" Hanare asked as they sat on the train.

"Someplace I can afford," Kakashi said.

Hanare giggled.

…

"And get me two fries. Two _large_ orders of fries," Hanare ordered. Kakashi gave her a look. Beneath his mask his lips were curled up in a smile.

"Do you want a milkshake, too?"

"Of course not! What are you trying to do? Bloat me?"

Kakashi chuckled and got in line at the In-N-Out Burger.

…

"Ooooh... I think I ate too much," Hanare groaned pitifully as they walked past a fountain lit up in rainbow colors.

"Good thing your dress has room for expansion," Kakashi said.

"Huh?" Hanare looked down at her outfit. "What are you talking about?"

Kakashi reached out and poked her in the side, on the bare skin between her crop top and her skirt. Hanare squealed and lunged away. Kakashi laughed.

"See? You can just let it all hang out," he said. Hanare gave him the eye as she danced ahead of him on the sidewalk. She appraised him coolly. He was wearing basically the same thing as earlier, except he'd put a thin leather jacket over it. And changed his shoes and headband.

"What's up with your jacket?"

"What about my jacket?"

"Are those… holes? I've never seen a mesh leather jacket." Hanare's tone was teasing, her gaze warm.

"The girl at that store where we went shopping with your friends told me it was cool," Kakashi laughed.

Hanare considered. "You don't look cool…" she said, and Kakashi raised an eyebrow, "So much as you look hot." She winked.

"Well," Kakashi said. "It's your fault if I'm overheating."

Hanare slapped a hand to her face and dissolved into giggles. "Oh, no… that was terrible!" Kakashi grinned under his mask. She was laughing. _That's good, right?_

The silver-haired ninja drifted across the sidewalk until he was close enough to smell the green apple and vanilla scent of Hanare's hair. Then he slipped his arm around her, and waited to see what kind of rebuke he might've earned.

 _A lecture, perhaps. Or a kick in the shin._ Kakashi smiled thoughtfully to himself. Either would be fine. He deserved both and it could be worse. He could be back in Konoha getting chewed out by Tsunade… or alone in his flat, reading porn, again…

Hanare leaned into him, and lay her head against his shoulder. Kakashi blinked and let it sink in slowly. It was, perhaps, the best feeling he'd ever experienced in his life.

Gently, Kakashi tightened his grip around the green-haired woman. He felt her slide her arm behind his back, and secure her fingers through one of the belt loops at his hip. _We're attached_ , Kakashi marvelled. _And I didn't even fall on her this time…_

They walked up the boulevard in the early evening glow. Neither said anything, in a sort of game-of-chicken where the first to speak might ruin the moment. The going-home crowds were starting, heading for train platforms and bicycles after work. No one paid them much attention. They could just be themselves-Kakashi and Hanare, nothing else. Without the uniforms, deception, bingo book enemies and jutsus they were just another couple out for a relaxing evening...

Hanare broke first. "Oh my god-there are _GENGAR_ in that UFO machine!"

"Hm?" Kakashi was jarred out of enjoying their walk by the fact that Hanare had torn herself away from his side in order to run over to the ground floor frontage of an arcade and peer into a prize game. He ambled slowly over to where she appeared to be basically salivating over Pokémon toys.

"Lend me some money," she said, holding out her hand. Kakashi hesitated, staring at her open palm. He didn't have very much cash, given that he'd returned what was left of Asuma and Guy's. He already owed them for what he'd spent Sunday night-on the necklace, Rei's time, dancers' clothes, karaoke, and dinner-and there was also the secondary small "loan" Asuma didn't know about yet…

Kakashi dug a coin from his pocket and reluctantly handed it to Hanare, who zealously fed it to the machine and proceeded to try and catch a Gengar.

"Damn!" Hanare cried, pounding her small fist on the console when the claw came back empty

"Dollar," she said, again holding out her hand. Kakashi sighed.

Ten minutes and twenty bucks later Kakashi had had enough. Hanare was nearly in tears and swearing like a sailor at the UFO game. Families were in this part of the arcade, and he saw parents protectively steering their children away from the Gengar machine.

Kakashi cleared his throat. "Hanare." There was no answer. His petite green-haired date was aggressively stalking around the machine, squinting and staring trying to get a bead on a better angle for her prey. And she was still muttering expletives.

"HANARE," Kakashi said, cringing inwardly at having to raise his voice in public. She looked up, surprised and a bit bewildered, like a deer in headlights.

"Look, Kakashi! Don't you think that's where I should aim next-right at the intersection of where the-"

"You're finished," Kakashi interrupted smoothly, gliding around the corner of the machine and firmly taking hold of Hanare.

"What?! Not yet! It's only been like what, a minute?" Hanare grabbed the machine and hung on.

"Hanare!" Kakashi reprimanded. Then his voice changed to a low growl. "Let. Go. Come stand over here." Reluctantly Hanare obeyed, and Kakashi guided her away from the game with an imprisoning grip on her upper arm. She was pouting and looking sadly at the grinning Gengar trapped behind glass.

Kakashi sighed. "Don't move from this spot," he ordered, standing her in a safe location next to a directory sign for the arcade. "Don't move, or no Gengar for you. Got it?"

"Wha-what?" Hanare looked up at him in confusion. He glared down at her. "Um, ah-okay, Kakashi," she managed, still trying to peer around him at the Pokémon.

Kakashi dug around in his pocket for one more coin. _Good_ , _got one_. He walked over to the UFO and studied the mechanism inside the glass.

Hanare was anxious. "What are you-"

"Stay!" Kakashi warned. A quick glance told him she was; for the moment, at least.

Kakashi sighed again because he hated gambling. _But it's not really gambling if i'm sure I can get the prize, right_? He appraised the machine and the layout of the toys once more. Then he slipped the coin into the slot.

"OH MY GOD KAKASHI! You did it! You're the best!" Hanare hugged the Gengar and jumped up and down in a little dance.

"Sshhh! Sssh." Kakashi scratched his head self-consciously. He looked bored, but inwardly he was rather pleased. Perhaps it wasn't as difficult to make Hanare happy as he'd previously thought. He watched her admire the silly toy, a bright flush on her face. "Well," he said, "Glad I could be of service."

Hanare glanced at him and grinned. She came over and threw her arms around his waist in a gigantic hug. "You don't know, Kakashi-I've been trying to win a Pokémon from these machines ever since I came to the city! I've probably spent hundreds of dollars…" The pleasant feeling of being squished between Hanare's bosom and Gengar's butt evaporated as her words sunk in. Kakashi blanched. _Hundreds… of dollars…?!_

…

The café wasn't very crowded and they had a nice coffee break with some dark chocolate love letters served by a very cute maid. Hanare ate most of the dessert. Kakashi drank his coffee twice as fast as she did, so he had to get another one. Try as she might, Hanare couldn't catch him pulling down his mask to eat or drink. Kakashi didn't have any trouble whatsoever catching Hanare with her mouth crammed full of cookie.

"Want to get a photo with the maids?" Hanare asked, chewing love letters.

"...Sure. If you want to," Kakashi said unenthusiastically. Hanare clapped her hands. They paid a little extra to get the photo-which Hanare said would be a nice memento she'd keep by her vanity or on the fridge.

…

The next part of the date was to go to the manga store, because Kakashi figured he might find something he was actually interested in and hopefully nothing would be so expensive that if Hanare wanted something he couldn't buy it for her.

Everything was fine and going according to plan, until Hanare wanted to go in the XXX-rated section.

"Ah… um…" Kakashi paused and scratched his head.

"Huh?" Hanare said. "Oh! Are you not into it? I thought, because you mentioned _Paradise Lost_ -"

"No, I'm totally into it!" Kakashi said defensively. Hanare narrowed her eyes at him.

"So… what's the problem?" she said, putting her hands on her hips.

"There's no problem." Kakashi shouldered past her and walked into the Adults-Only area.

Hanare was delighted. "I… I've never been able to just _do this_ with someone else before!" She flitted from rack to shelf. She picked up things and showed them to him and asked his opinion. Kakashi adjusted his jacket. He felt a little warm under the collar. He tried to respond to Hanare sincerely-after all, if she'd never done this with anyone, didn't it mean she must've always done it alone before? Kakashi had often wished he had a companion for any number of activities…

"Is this too much?" Hanare was holding something up. She winked at him. Apparently this comic shop didn't have just manga in this section. It was a mix of costumes, toys, collectors' items…

Kakashi swallowed. "Well, it depends," he said, eyeing the item Hanare was holding and adjusting his own shirt again. "Where, ah, would you be wearing it? Hypothetically." The metal-studded red leather catsuit certainly wasn't "day at the beach" or "grocery shopping" material.

Hanare gave him a look. "At… at the club?" Kakashi guessed, looking at the item again. It had holes in… places… "Like as a work outfit-?"

"No!" Hanare said, exasperated. She shoved the thing back on the rack and sulked. Kakashi was confused. "I was-" she started and stopped. She bit her lip. He looked closer. She was blushing. She turned away and picked up a manga with schoolgirls on the front. The cover illustration showed them all sitting in ways that showed their panties, and the panties were wet. Hanare quickly became engrossed in the comic. Kakashi found himself staring at _her-_ in the tight pale blue dress that clung to her body all over-as she stared at the smutty manga, and he had to look away.

He tried puzzling out what had made her so irritated about the red catsuit conversation, while he simultaneously imagined Guy clipping his toenails. Just to keep a lid on things.

Kakashi focused all his powers of deduction on the problem of Hanare. Well-not that she was a problem-but being able to understand her at all in such a short time frame was certainly problematic. A challenge. Wouldn't it be easier if she'd just say what she meant? Kakashi scratched his chin through his mask and surreptitiously peeked over at his date. She was several pages into the schoolgirl manga, reading at a furious pace. Her lips moved slightly as she read. Her eyes were bright and her cheeks just slightly flushed.

 _I am picky._ Kakashi admitted. She was the prettiest girl in the store. She was reading porn, and she was with him. _I don't mind a challenge… What if this was a scene in Tactics? What would Tadashi do…_

"Hana." There was a tap on her shoulder.

"What… Kakashi…" Hanare said distractedly, not looking up from the manga. The Copy Nin reached out and grabbed the comic. "Hey!" Hanare cried, turning around with a cute angry glare on her face. Kakashi held the manga up and away from her reach.

"Tsk, tsk," he said, dangling it in front of her like a carrot. "If you want this, you're going to have to do something for me."

Hanare crossed her arms. "Oh really? That's ridiculous, Kakashi, there's an entire rack of them. I can just-" Hanare stopped cold, her hand outstretched over an empty display rack. Where all the copies of the schoolgirl manga had been a moment ago there was now _nothing_. Just empty space. The entire rack was bare. Hanare turned slowly, eyes squinted in suspicion at her "date."

"Kakashi-!" she glowered.

"Well, do you want to see what happens in this story, or not?" Kakashi held the manga up to his face, out of her reach, and opened it to the middle of the book. "Oh, mmm hmmm… this looks _good_ ," he murmured, dark eye flicking over the page. "Maybe I'll just get it for myself… yes-Oh! That's very nice…"

"Kakashi!" Hanare wailed, her voice soft and tortured. "Stop that! Let me see, at least-ooohhh, I hate you! What's happening?! Aaargh! Fine. Fine! What do you want from me?"

Kakashi's eye slid to the side to gaze at her from over the top of the book.

"You're not going to like it," he said, his voice a teasing lilt.

"I can handle all your foolishness!" Hanare retorted. "The faster, the better. Then I can get back to reading and actually doing _something interesting._ "

 _Ouch_. Kakashi decided to ignore that. The kunoichi's face was pink and she was obviously flustered over the manga. _Right where I want her._

"Come on, then," Kakashi said, extending an arm. "I'll buy this for you, and then you can earn it." Hanare bit her lip and hesitated. But her curiosity won out and she took hold of him-albeit with a haughty, cold expression on her face. They went up to the cashier.

As Kakashi paid for the book he leaned over and whispered a question to the salesgirl. "Excuse me, I'm not from here-could you point us in the direction of the nearest-"

…

"I'm not coming out in this, Kakashi."

"Yes you are, Hanare."

"No, I'm not-"

"Wow, on page 49 there is a huge plot twist-you really should see this."

"Kakashi! STOP READING MY MANGA!"

"Well, if I had something else to look at, I wouldn't have too."

There was some minor swearing and then a sigh from the dressing room. The curtain pulled back a tiny bit. A green-haired head popped out.

"Why are you sitting so far away?!" Hanare hissed irritably. There were two very pink circles on her cheeks. Kakashi tried to look stoic.

"Because this is where the chairs are," he replied. Hanare rolled her eyes and glanced around nervously. "We're the only ones here," Kakashi assured her. Hanare still hesitated.

"Are you sure… you want to see me in this,Kakashi," she mumbled at the floor. Kakashi felt guilty for a second. But only a second.

"Of course. I have to see if I want to buy it for you," he said matter-of-factly. Inside, his heart was racing. And there was definitely perspiration under his headband. Hanare nodded in resignation and disappeared back into the dressing room. Kakashi heard another sigh (and possibly a muffled growl) from behind the curtain as Hanare adjusted (he guessed) some things. There was the chime of a little bell.

The curtain swung open so suddenly that Kakashi jumped a little in his seat. His eye widened. The manga slid off the seat onto the floor.

"This is ridiculous," Hanare said flatly.

Kakashi couldn't agree more. It was ridiculous. _Ridiculously amazing_. The man who copied a thousand jutsus just sat there, staring in a daze. When they'd entered the lingerie shop Hanare had been embarrassed and surly, and Kakashi had just grabbed whatever looked like an over-the-top hassle for her to put on. It was definitely _not_ the same high-end French lingerie store Vega had taken her to-this one was a lot more… uh, frivolous… and Kakashi was sure he wouldn't even _want_ to get her anything, in the end-

But now… Now Kakashi was only sure that he didn't know a damn thing about the mysterious ways of lingerie. Hanare was refusing to make eye contact, standing on the dressing room platform fidgeting and looking angry and blushing in turn… in a sort of cycle that was making Kakashi very uncomfortable… in certain _places._ When she moved the furry little tail thing moved, and when she tilted her head to roll her eyes the bells on the furry ears jingled. When they jingled, Hanare blushed more. Kakashi pulled up his mask a little higher.

"Well?!" Hanare demanded. She finally slid her gaze over to meet his. Kakashi just raised an eyebrow. Hanare threw up her hands-er, _paws_ -in disgust, which set off a whole new round of jingling. Hanare turned bright red and put a paw on her hip, which was just too adorable. The bells reminded Kakashi of the genins' Survival Test…

"Maybe I'll have you try to keep those bells away from me," he mused aloud. Hanare looked at him in alarm. "Turn around," he ordered. Hanare clasped her paws over the ruffly apron that said "Room Service" and did as she was told, trying to make as little _ringing_ as possible. The back view wasn't bad, either. The entire thing was lace, and low-cut, and short, too. It really was obnoxious and Kakashi had been so sure he was going to hate it. After all, he didn't particularly like cats _or_ maids… Why would a cat be working as a maid, anyway? And what would cat room service entail? Tail, ha, ha! _Hanare's butt sure looks cute…_ A vision of her curled up on the bed in just the ears floated into Kakashi's head...

"Are you just going to stare all night?! Hanare snapped. Kakashi blinked, coming back to reality. She was looking over her shoulder at him, glaring.

"No, you can take it off now. Let's go eat sushi." That put a smile on Hanare's face, and she bounded into the dressing room like an actual kitten, in a symphony of jingling.

…

Hanare was happily ensconced in a corner seat at the izakaya, with the bag of cat maid costume on one side of her, Kakashi on the other, and schoolgirl manga in hand. There was a half-eaten order of uni in front of her. Kakashi refilled their saké cups.

"Oh my gosh, this is filthy!" Hanare giggled as she turned the page. Some of the other patrons were giving them looks but Kakashi didn't care. He just looked at them right back and hovered protectively over his smut-reading date. He did, however, gently adjust Hanare's hold on the book so the wet-panty cover wasn't flashing everyone in the restaurant.

Hanare took a break from reading to take a bite of uni. "Wantswum?" she offered. Kakashi shook his head. Hanare looked disappointed.

"It's not my favorite," he explained.

"Really? I love it," she said. She washed down the bite with a big swallow of saké.

"It's a texture thing," Kakashi blushed. He stirred more wasabi into his shoyu.

Hanare shrugged. "You know what they say, though."

"What." Kakashi picked up a piece of saba in his chopsticks.

"You can tell a lot about a man from what he eats." Hanare waggled her eyebrows. Kakashi just looked at her. "It's true," Hanare insisted. "There's a Filipino saying: _if he can eat balut, he can go down on you._ "

Kakashi frowned. "What's that got to do with uni…"

Hanare just laughed.

…

The boardwalk was quieter than a weekend night, but there were still a lot of people out. More locals, less tourists. The sun had just gone down, closing out its shift for yet another long summer day. The sky was purple and carmine from the afterglow. The waves lapped gently onto the shore. Hanare was leaning over the rail of the viewpoint, her green hair moving softly in the sea breeze. She was watching the people below them on the beach intently. Kakashi stood near her with his hands in his pockets, enjoying the scent of the saltwater and sand. This city was a nice change from Konoha, when he wasn't fighting baddies. The climate certainly had things going for it… _Or maybe…_ he took a furtive glance at Hanare; _maybe it's the company_. Her face was focused but peaceful, the dark-honey eyes flicking back and forth. She stood with her feet up on the bottom of the boardwalk railing, like a kid. Hanare was a lot different from Rei, it seemed. Yet, there were also similarities… many facets to be found, in the same woman.

Kakashi leaned back a little and looked up at the sky. There were lots of clouds, but the stars were starting to peek through. The shapes in the sky ranged from navy blue to soft lavender. Kakashi thought he saw a blob that resembled his parents' house. And over there… Hana, perhaps.

"Truth or dare, time, eh Kakashi?" Hanare's softly-spoken statement cut in on his thoughts like one of the Seven Samurai Swordsmen.

He looked at her quizzically. She was leaning on the rail, facing him now, eyes downcast. The lights of the city outlined her hair in aquamarine. The breeze lifted and brought a hint of vanilla and apple to him. Kakashi was filled with a strange sense of déjâ vu. "Ask me anything," Hanare said, "and then, I'll ask you something."

Kakashi thought. A part of him was warning him not to play. His heartbeat ticked up. _But it seems… she has something to ask_ … Everything had gone so well. Now… he had to risk it all in this one moment? _Just like that day in Konoha_. Kakashi's palms sweated in his pockets. That day, she'd opened up, come around-then, the damnable trade for Reichi (idiot was always getting captured, anyway!)... and it all escalated. Kakashi's mind scrambled for an out- _if I could have done it differently, what would I have done? What other choices did I have?_ Kakashi was certain that _talking_ here was a bad idea. _Maybe I can rig some kind of disruption_ \- he glanced at the telephone wires above-

"Kakashi!" Hanare scolded. "Don't try and get out of it. You go first. Ask. Or I'll go first, and you'll miss your chance." Hanare was looking at him sternly, a smirk on her lips. Kakashi scratched his head guiltily. He sighed. There was only one question, obviously, that he had… after all these years.

"Did you really delete the intel on Konoha from your brain?"

Hanare looked surprised. Then she frowned. Kakashi's face was composed and unreadable. After he'd broached the question, he'd had a violent inner cringe and his heart had started thumping obnoxiously. _Why did I ask that… does it even matter_ Kakashi thought angrily. _Konoha can just go to hell for once_ \- the sense of déjâ vu was overwhelming…

"No," Hanare said simply. "I did not."

Kakashi felt like his heart stopped. He had expected her to be angry… at him, for asking-angry that he doubted her. She'd be angry of course that he brought up the past, but… _she didn't delete the intel?!_

"You didn't. Delete it." Kakashi's voice was robotic, his face, shocked for a split second, was now devoid of visible emotion. He nodded woodenly.

Hanare looked down and shrugged. "I had a job to do."

Kakashi stared.

Hanare swallowed. "My turn. Why didn't you come after me? Try to find me? I hoped you would, for a long time."

Kakashi was silent. The scene played back in his head like it was yesterday.

 _Use your Sharingan. Please. I want you to. Do this so I know that you'll believe me-_

Hanare's tearful face was burned into his memory like it was a polaroid picture.

"You… you played me," he said softly, after a moment.

"Is that why you never came after me?" Hanare said, looking up at him. Her eyes were clear, golden; her tone unapologetic.

Kakashi didn't answer. He looked out over the sea. His hands balled into fists in his pockets.

"I guess I made the right decision," he said.

Hanare waited for him to say more. When he didn't, a shadow of sadness passed across her face.

"I guess so," she said. "So, from what you've said-and haven't-and other information I've gathered… You came here for your birthday weekend, and _happened_ to see me at Paradise, when Guy and Asuma took you there."

Kakashi looked down at her. He inclined his chin just slightly. Another flicker of something crossed her face, but he wasn't sure what it was. Kakashi's insides felt wound tight, like a steel chain. He didn't know how to undo "it"-whatever it was. He felt like it was choking him… with anger, disappointment, loss, and bleakness- _how could I compromise the village like that?! People might have died! How could I choose so wrongly?! How could I… how could_ she…

"I see," Hanare said in a whisper. She looked away for a moment, and when she turned back and smiled at him it was a smile of resolve, nothing else.

"I know I hurt you… about the intel. To this day, I can't figure out why you let me go… if nothing was to come of it. But… I think you made the right choice the first time, Kakashi. In not coming after me. You were right. Thank you for everything, for tonight. I had a lovely time. Please… don't worry about me, and don't feel badly. You were right to let me go. Goodbye, Kakashi."

Hanare picked up the shopping bag and turned away. She walked south along the boardwalk, hair blowing in the night breeze. She didn't look back. Kakashi watched until she disappeared into a crowd near the stair that led down to the beach. Then he turned, and walked in the opposite direction.


	23. Chapter 23

The night had turned hot and sticky. The air was still, heavy, and stifling, and even with the lanai doors open Hanare felt like she was suffocating.

For what seemed like the millionth time she flung the sheets off her body and got up. She couldn't sleep. She kicked her bed in frustration on the way out.

"Ouch! Dammit," she swore, rubbing her stubbed toe and then limping out of the room. _You shouldn't be so childish,_ she scolded herself.

It had been a long walk home. She'd taken a roundabout way to discourage Kakashi in case he was following her, but she hadn't sensed him at all. Eventually her feet got tired and she called a cab. She could've taken the train… but she'd just been there with Kakashi, and didn't want to trod on the memory, yet.

Hanare headed to the only cool place in the apartment: the fridge. It felt like the longest Tuesday of her life, like she'd been running sprints repeatedly-up, down, high, and low… Hanare wasn't sure she'd ever been more tired. She shuffled across the living room. Her feet touched the cool kitchen tile, and even that small change was welcome in the stuffy heat.

When she'd finally gotten home after the boardwalk conversation with Kakashi, Hanare had sat-just sat-curled up on the couch for over an hour. She wasn't even crying. She just felt dead inside. _I was right-it was a coincidence. He didn't come looking for me. I just happened to be here._ Hanare wondered why that mattered so much to her… it did, but why? _Does it even matter now?_

She pulled open the fridge door slowly. Cold air wafted out and she felt better. The rest of the apartment was dark. She briefly wished the fridge was a portal to somewhere else. Anywhere. Else. _I'll just pack up again and move,_ she thought. _No one will really miss me. I don't have any deep ties here… Yuki is gone, there's no reason to stay._ The image of Kakashi standing in her kitchen came to mind. It hurt. Hanare moved a cabbage aside and pulled out the bottle of vodka hidden behind it.

She shut the fridge and stood in the dark, clutching the cold bottle but not drinking it. She walked into the living room, saw Gengar grinning at her from the couch (in his spot next to Hello Kitty) and turned around and walked back into the kitchen. She wanted to go out to the lanai and watch the night traffic, just so she wouldn't be so alone, but she was wearing only a nightgown and was too lazy to get her robe from the bedroom. She boosted herself up and sat on the kitchen counter instead, slouching comfortably with her legs apart. _No one's watching_ she thought, gleeful and morbid at the same time. She cracked the vodka.

There was a _clang_ from outside. Hanare froze. _Could it-_ she didn't move, listening. Then she heard a familiar voice. She sighed. The morons on the fourth floor were still awake and at it again, apparently. She could hear them bumping into stuff on the patio above hers. Hanare took a huge swig of vodka. _You're a moron too,_ she told herself. _It's not him. He's not going to be here. You just_ wish _it was him._

"Hi."

Hanare screamed.

Her first instinct was to attack, and she raised the vodka bottle like a weapon. Then the outline of the intruder came into focus. Her second instinct was to attack with the bottle _anyway_ but that would make a huge mess…

"It's me. Kakashi."

"I _know_ ," Hanare nearly shouted.

"Are you usually this loud? Will the neighbors think something is wrong?"

"SOMETHING IS WRONG."

"Well, wouldn't want them to call the cops or something-"

"I wouldn't mind if they did! Then they'd arrest you for _breaking into_ my apartment and I'd finally be free of you!"

"Only if they could catch me."

"Aaaargh!"

"One minute." Kakashi's silhouette disappeared from the kitchen doorway and Hanare heard him step out onto the lanai.

" _Don't worry-uh, sweetheart-I got the rat!_ " she heard him yell.

Kakashi reappeared in the kitchen entry.

"Great. Now the neighbors think my apartment has rats!"

"Do you care what the neighbors think?"

"Do you care about anything that's not about _you_ personally?'" Hanare snapped. _Maybe I really should call the cops on him. That'd serve him right._ The thought of Kakashi having to hightail it outta there put a smirk on her lips.

Kakashi stared at her in silence. He had his arm up, leaning against the doorframe like he was too tired to stand on his own. He'd changed into a hoodie at some point, and his hair was mussed over the plain headband. He still had his mask on, but right at that moment he reached up and pulled it off. He tossed it on her kitchen table.

Hanare looked at him in surprise. It was odd seeing him with the Sharingan covered but not his face; and here in her home, not on the battlefield. He looked like he didn't get quite enough sun to be healthy. Definitely starting to get circles under the eyes-probably from reading in low light. She'd seen his face as Kenta, but without the youthful floppy brown waves to soften things… Kakashi's face looked much older. The silver hair and gray-black eye color were harsher than their sable-hazel counterparts in his disguise. Hanare swallowed. He looked a lot more intense this way, here in the dark with her, and once again she was faced with the cold reality that she didn't know him very well at all. His pensive lips twitched beneath the strong but elegant nose.

"My father committed suicide," Kakashi said. "I don't know if that gossip reached all the way… to Jomae."

Hanare hesitated. "The White Fang of Konoha," she said softly. "Yes, I heard but was very young. I didn't realize it was your father until much, much later… when I-" Hanare stopped abruptly.

Kakashi regarded her with one dark eye. "When you what?"

Hanare fiddled with the vodka bottle. _Ah, might as well tell him. Nothing to lose at this point anyway. It's over._ She sighed. "I, uh, may have done a little… research… on you. Over the years." She felt the weight of his onyx gaze on her and knew the flush on her cheeks wasn't just from the vodka.

"A little research?" Kakashi sounded truly surprised. "Like for a bingo boo-"

"No! Like… personally… like on the side. A little. Like a whole file's worth." Hanare looked at the far wall. Kakashi was quiet. "You know, like a crazy stalker kunoichi!" she threw up her hands. His silence was driving her nuts. She felt herself just turning redder and redder. "Anyway-this isn't what we were discussing. You… brought up your father's death. Which-I'm sorry, Kakashi. I really am. I imagined what I'd say to you about it many times, but now that I'm here… well, nothing is sufficient, really, is it? I'm so sorry."

Kakashi shrugged. "He missed my mother too much, I guess. Wanted to be with her. He figured… that I… could manage."

Hanare felt a sharp pain in her chest. She gritted her teeth against all the urges she was having. "Why… are you telling me this, Kakashi." His hair had a halo of platinum from the street lights. His head was slightly bowed.

"I don't know," he said. He closed his visible eye. "I remember… you telling me… that you never knew your parents. Was that true, Hanare? Was any of it true?"

His dark eye opened and looked up at her, full of sorrow, and a glint of anger.

Hanare glared. "It was all true, Kakashi, except that I didn't delete the intel on Konoha."

"You said it was your home," Kakashi growled. "How could you do that, to the place you call home?!" The shadows fell across his face but his voice was clear. The familiar words brought tears to Hanare's eyes but she held back. "You made a complete fool of me," Kakashi glared.

"You're still a fool," the kunoichi retorted, "If you think I owe you something- _anything_ -from a year-old mission during which we _were on opposing sides_."

"I believed you," Kakashi said, voice low with emotion.

"You told me you wanted to fight to the death, but that I'd lost my honor as a ninja! Was _that true?!_ Was that really what you meant, Kakashi?! I mean, let's go, then, we can finish it right here! You know now I _didn't_ lose my honor at all! I just did my job. I made Kakashi, the great Sharingan Warrior of the famous Leaf Village-screw up and _let an enemy ninja escape._ You let me go. _You_ made the decision. Now I'm supposed to be grateful to you for that?! And _guilty_ that I wasn't what you thought I was? Well, _I'm not._ I only wish I'd never told you you were in my heart in the first place! I wish I'd deleted _you_ from my brain as soon as I'd met you!"

Hanare moved to jump off the counter but Kakashi was there in an instant, blocking her way. "We're not done yet!" he said, planting an arm on either side of her and effectively pinning her in place. Hanare recoiled and glanced around for a weapon. A stale baguette would have to suffice. Her hand darted out like a snake-

"Don't even think about it," Kakashi warned, clamping his hand over her wrist.

"Kakashi-" Hanare said angrily, but she had to shut up and stop talking because it seemed, surprisingly, that the Copy Ninja was _kissing_ her…

He tasted like clouds.

…

Hanare smelled like springtime. It was trees in the orchard… apple trees. Vanilla. From baking. Kakashi had a faint memory float to the surface-his mother, baking? It was more like a feeling than a memory. _And is it totally creepy I'm thinking of my parents right now…_ Kakashi figured it probably was at least a little creepy.

He ran his hands up Hanare's arms. Her skin was smooth and silky; her lips, soft. She wasn't fighting him anymore. She twined her fingers in his belt and pulled him closer. Her mouth was open and welcoming. She leaned back, trusting him to hold her as she caressed his shoulders, his hair….

Kakashi was amazed at the change. _Was this what she wanted, all along?_ He would never… have been… so… forward…

Under…

Normal…

Circumstances-

The blood was rushing to the Copy Nin's temples and elsewhere on his person, too. Kakashi felt like his shirt was too hot… that all his clothes were in the way. He had one hand tangled in Hanare's hair at the nape of her neck. He pulled her head to the side as he kissed along her jaw and neck. She moaned softly. She might have whispered his name. His other hand slid up her outer thigh until his fingers ran into the line of lacey stuff that crossed her hip. He wrapped his fingers around the fabric and pulled slightly, wanting it gone. _Would it be rude to just… rip it…_ Kakashi had a strong urge to do it, but hesitated. They might've been expensive underwear, after all-

"Kakashi," Hanare's voice was breathless in his ear. " _Why are you here_?... _What do you want from me_?"

He hadn't expected that. He paused. He looked at the woman in front of him. Her cheeks were pink, her light brown eyes sparkled up at him. Her hair was messed up, and he realized he was fond of it that way. He thought of carrying her on his back through the valley… of fighting at her side in the arena. He remembered her pulling Asuma up on stage, when she wore the yellow ruffles… and then, the red dress, with Vega… Suddenly, it hit Kakashi clearly: _all those times, it was me. I've always been in her heart-she told me the truth, but I've never admitted… that she's always been in mine. All I had to do was meet her halfway._

"I'm here, Hanare," Kakashi said, "To take you home."

Hanare's eyes widened slightly. She stared up at him, and he found her expression beautiful and fathomless. Kakashi didn't falter. His exposed eye was dark, unflinching. He met her gaze head-on.

Hanare bit her lip. "I… I'm not looking for a fling, Kakashi…"

The silver-haired jonin paused. His mask twitched slightly. "Neither am I."

Hanare gasped, a flush of pleasure spreading across her face. She bit her lip. "Then… then there's something I need to tell you-I never deleted the intel, but I didn't do anything with it, either. It never went anywhere other than right here." She tapped her temple. She smiled hesitantly. "It was the least I could do… not much, but all I could contribute to keeping _you_ safe, too… I, I'm sorry if-"

The Copy Ninja interrupted. "Sssh. Now we're done. Talking."

Hanare had to comply-after all, Kakashi really was a good kisser.

…

Gengar and Hello Kitty tumbled to the floor, rudely displaced. They rolled to a stop on the carpet, Hello Kitty firmly on top.

…

Hanare blinked. What time was it? There was a sliver of light cutting across the floor of living room. She could see it from where she was lying in the bed.

In. The. Bed.

The green-haired kunoichi's mind flooded with memories of the night before, mixed in with memories of the weekend and everything that had happened. _Oh my god_ she mouthed in silence, cheeks flushing. Her head was angled to the side of the bed, almost over the edge. She was twisted, partially on her hip, partially on her stomach. Her arm was asleep, and…

There was something between her legs.

Hanare reached her free hand back, cautiously doing an exploratory _pat, pat, pat_ of her surroundings. The thing between her legs was hard and well-muscled. Another leg. Someone else's. _Kakashi. Hatake's._ Leg.

Her hand confirmed what her legs knew; Kakashi Hatake was lying behind her. There was a firm hip attached to the leg, there was a torso attached to the hip and an arm coming from the torso that was wrapped possessively around her shoulders and neck. Everything was naked. Kakashi's skin was cool but sweaty and warm where it was touching hers. She turned her face slightly. He was breathing onto her neck, snoring a little. His hair tickled her nose. It smelled like… generic shampoo.

Hanare grinned. Then her stomach growled. She bit her lip and shifted, trying to untangle her foot from the sheet and air out the part of her back that was burning up from being pressed against the Copy Nin… _I don't need to wake him up-I'll just run into the kitchen and get a snack._ Hanare edged forward, trying to ease some distance between her and Kakashi. _I'll just freshen up, too_ , she thought, surprised at the pleasant soreness when she moved her thighs. She scooted toward the edge of the bed.

A hand clamped down over her hip bone. "We're not finished yet," a sleepy voice mumbled into the pillow.

"Kakashi? Good morning! I didn't mean to wake y-"

" _Ssshh_." Kakashi's arm around her shoulders tightened as he dragged her back toward him.

"Kakashi! I'm just hungry… and I need to go to the bathroom…" Hanare resisted, but the stronger ninja pulled her close until she was pressed up against him again.

"Oh!" Hanare exclaimed, feeling him behind her. He mumbled something unintelligible into her hair. His left hand curled around her bosom and he started groping her. "Kakashi-hey, are you even awake?' Hanare hissed. There was no answer. Kakashi moved his hips and Hanare gasped. The thing between her legs was now certainly _not_ another leg…

Hanare felt her face getting warm. She was gross and sticky and wanted to hit the reset button but-

It felt _so good_ being cuddled by Kakashi. Their size difference was just right. His body curved protectively around hers as he sought to take her again. The feeling of his strength wrapping her up made Hanare want to fight against it and just give in to him at the same time. She honestly couldn't tell if he was awake or not, and she didn't care. It was _Kakashi._

"Ooh," escaped her lips as his hand pressed down on her hip, guiding her into position so he could enter her. "Kakashi-" she whispered. Still no answer. "You silly shinobi, you're not even awake are y-"

Hanare's words were cut short in a gasp as Kakashi pushed himself inside her again. Hanare gave in to the sensation of being his as he began to thrust slowly. "Ah!" she breathed. Hanare couldn't believe how good it felt. She'd had plenty of lovers. Kakashi wasn't even consciously making love to her, and it still felt better than when she'd been with anyone else.

"Kakashi…" Hanare moaned softly, pushing her hips back against him reflexly. Kakashi growled into her neck, pushing himself deeper. Hanare gasped again; reached back and grabbed his hair, encouraging him.

"Hanare?" she heard him mumble.

"Oh, Kakashi, I… you…" Hanare fumbled for what she wanted to say. He felt so good inside of her. She couldn't think straight; didn't want to think straight.

"Hana!" Kakashi exclaimed. For some reason, Hanare thought he sounded… _relieved._ "Sshhh," he said as he grabbed her hips in both hands to pull her down harder onto him, kissing the nape of her neck at the same time. Hanare felt faint.

"Kakashi, please-"

The silver-haired ninja moved inside of her rhythmically, until Hanare's eyes were half-closed and she couldn't speak. Then he rolled her over onto her stomach, still inside of her, and thrust even deeper. Hanare clung to the mattress with both hands. Each movement of Kakashi's hips forced her against the bed in an excruciatingly good way, and all Hanare could do was mewl. She was making a mess, she could feel it…

Suddenly Hanare reached her peak and it seemed Kakashi did at the same time-he growled and Hanare whimpered in a mixture of pleasure and pain as he finished. The sensation rolled through the green-haired kunoichi like a wave, each aftershock of her climax a ripple in the water.

"Guhhh." Hanare's forehead flopped down to the mattress as she went totally limp. Kakashi grunted and similarly plopped down over her shoulder. He didn't even roll off-he was still attached to her, completely relaxed, using her body as _his_ mattress. Hanare squinted an eye open to peek at her lover's face, so peacefully resting half on her shoulder, half on the bed. The silvery hair was dark gray with sweat in some places. His eyes were closed. He still looked tired-but at least now he looked… tired _and_ happy…?

"Kakashi," Hanare whispered reluctantly. The dark eye opened. He held the Sharingan side shut.

"Sorry," he said. He extricated himself from her gently, rolling off to the side with an apologetic smile on his face. "You're just so damn comfortable. I could stay inside you forever."

Hanare blushed into the mattress and giggled. "No, I'm sorry-I'd gladly let you stay on top of me, but I couldn't breathe."

"Breathing… overrated," Kakashi murmured. He had a goofy, blissful expression on his face.

"Kakashi. That is pure kink," Hanare teased. She leaned over and kissed him on the cheek. "I'm going to get up and go to the bathroom now-but don't worry, I'll be right back."

Kakashi's right eye cracked open a slit and gleamed in the morning light as he looked at her. "I've got a perimeter set up and there are paper bombs in the hallway so don't get any-"

"Kakashi! That's a safety hazard."

"Safe is overrated."

"What if they go off and damage the building-I'll lose my security deposit."

"Better a safety hazard than sorry."

"Kakashi!"

"Better a lost security deposit, than sorry."

"Aargh!" Hanare smashed a pillow on top of the Copy Ninja's face to muffle the annoyance.

Kakashi pulled the pillow down so it was just covering the bottom of his face. He spoke through it like was a mask. "Sorry, Hana," he said. "I'll take the bombs down after breakfast."

Hanare's stomach growled on cue. "Ooh, breakfast! What's for breakfast?" she mused rhetorically, thinking of all the delicious things they could-

"Uni," Kakashi said, eyes crinkling at the corners.

Hanare frowned. "Uni? Kakashi what are you talking abou-OH no! No you don't; Kakashi, no, that is just too gross-aiieee!"

Hanare tried to run, but she was just no match for Kakashi of the Sharingan, the man who copied a thousand jutsus.


	24. Chapter 24

The letter lay open on the table. The Hokage's stamp glared up disapprovingly in angry red ink, threatening Konoha's finest with court martial and more. Kakashi regarded the document with mild disdain.

"It's only been a week," he murmured self-righteously. It was true. Barely 6.5 days ago Guy and Asuma had kidnapped him, forced him into celebrating his birthday in one of the sinfulest resort towns there was, and now that he was finally enjoying himself-everyone was mad at him.

Tsunade made it sound like the village was going to burn down while Kakashi was "playing hooky" (which it very well might)... but even if he were there it didn't guarantee anything. Half the time he fought he felt like it made little to no difference. Plans failed, he made the wrong call, he exhausted his physical capacity and hit a wall, it was a bad matchup, etc etc. In his younger days Kakashi wouldn't ever have been able to live with the idea that he, Kakashi of the Sharingan, wasn't perfect when it came to preparation and execution… that the outcome of a battle wasn't focused solely on him and his prowess. But genin teams and mentoring taught you a lot-as did romance. Both were sure to bruise your ego… many times over.

Kakashi scratched his head with chagrin. It was Friday morning. He could hear Hanare singing in the shower. She had a very nice voice… but unfortunately for Kakashi she loved to sing _country_ …

The silver-haired jonin folded up Lady Hokage's latest missive and put it in the pocket of his jeans. Romance. That was what this was, right? Kakashi assumed so, because they'd been having _a lot_ of sex. The bookstore section was labeled "Sex and Romance"-proof that the two did (or should) go together. Somehow this felt different than with Kurenai… or Yugao. He supposed that was just sex, though he held both women in high regard. Many feelings Kakashi had with Hanare he recognized as feelings he usually had with _male_ comrades-like Tenzo or Guy-closeness over dirty jokes, or arguments, or exchanges on philosophy. Or random, silly competitions. He supposed he could've tried having sex with Guy or Tenzo-he'd never really thought about it-but Hanare just seemed naturally more appealing, for him.

Kakashi shrugged off his deep thoughts. Hanare had started in on a new song and it brought a smile to his face as he thought of her using up all the hot water. Since Wednesday, they'd fallen into an enchanting civilian routine of eating and sex. Kakashi cleared the dishes off the table. Today they'd had omelettes, after having sex right when they woke up. After they'd eaten Kakashi had offered to let Hana have the first shower because of this damn letter that had _poofed_ into his mail-scrollcase in the middle of the night, that he knew he should read sooner rather than later. Kakashi put the dishes in the sink, nearly forgetting the problem of the letter while he considered whether to interrupt Hana in the shower to have sex with her again.

 _The letter_. The enticing image of naked country-crooner Hanare. _The letter._ If he made love to her, she'd have to stop singing… Kakashi's feet headed toward the bathroom. _I'll make her moan and whimper and say 'Kakashi' instead of using her breath on this 'I hate my job and my wife left me' business…_ No. The letter really did need attending to. Kakashi gritted his teeth and picked up his mask from the table. He took a sharp left to go out onto the lanai, pausing briefly to adjust his jeans so the beginning of his arousal wasn't showing.

The morning was a little cool and people were at work so it wasn't very busy out. The pigeons were making the rounds. Kakashi leaned his elbows on the rail and looked down at the street, contemplating his next move.

Everything had happened so fast.

" _I'm not looking for a fling, Kakashi."_

The Copy Ninja sighed. _I should've kept her in Konoha the first time_. It would have been complicated… asking Hiruzen to grant her temporary immunity… souring their relations with Lock… trying to acclimate her, get people to trust her… _And why would we have trusted her? She didn't even delete the intel,_ Kakashi thought darkly. But then another voice chided, _you can't fault her for doing her job just because you didn't do yours._

That was also true. The truth was, Kakashi had multiple reasons for not wanting to keep Hanare in Konoha that day. He'd fully intended to go through with the plan of recapturing her after the Reichi exchange-until they blew the bridge, and he realized as they fell that he was more concerned with Hanare's safety than with the mission objectives. _I think my exact thought was 'gee, hope she doesn't slip, turn her ankle or tear her dress… well I guess I could buy her a new one… but better be ready to catch her anyway-' jeez, it makes me cringe even now,_ Kakashi thought, cringing. And then of course Hanare had flipped into kunoichi mode and the world turned upside down.

 _Nothing I told her at the cliff made sense. Because it_ didn't _make sense_. _I just couldn't risk having her stay. Sure… they might've wanted to execute her, and I'd be in a terrible position… but that would be unlike Hiruzen. If she'd stayed, I knew it meant everything would change. I'd have to at least take responsibility for her capture, and I couldn't even look at her without thinking of the kiss. I'd be stuck seeing her around, maybe in the prison, either just watching from a distance or worrying about what Inoichi and Ibiki were doing to her. I'd have to admit to Hiruzen, and Iruka, and whoever else on the committee… my feelings…_

Kakashi shook his head at the memory. It had been too much to ask at the time. _It was a cowardly choice. I abandoned her, because it made it easier for me. I tried to tell her, at the cliff, in my own convoluted way, but that probably just caused problems for her after she left… Inexcusable._

A car honked somewhere. Kakashi looked up at the sky. _The clouds._ ' _The clouds will give you hope'... I must've heard that somewhere. There's no way I made that up myself, at fourteen. Maybe it was in a manga. But she credits me with the advice... I'm twenty-five now. What are my hopes, now, anyway? What do I want?_

The clouds shifted in the sky. _Mmm. Yeah. That would make it impossible for Tsunade to refuse._ The clouds moved again. Kakashi nodded to himself. A pigeon landed on the rail next to him.

"Might as well," Kakashi shrugged at the bird. It cooed back. "Right," Kakashi said. "Nothing to lose."

…

"Kakashi, why won't you tell me what we're doing?" Hanare giggled. Kakashi glanced over at her. She looked really cute in the blindfold. They were in the back of a cheap limo, Kakashi having used up the rest of his secret and final "Asuma loan" a few hours earlier. Kakashi figured he had just enough after this for fare back to Konoha… for two. If all went as planned.

It could all backfire, after all. Kakashi's hand curved over Hanare's on the seat; his grip tightened slightly as he thought of all the spaces in his life in the Leaf, and how Hanare might fill them… if she wanted to, of course.

"How much further?!" Hanare said, being sulky. Kakashi wanted to do it in the back of the limo-she looked so sweet in the lace dress she had on-but he figured that was just a little too trashy. Still, he indulged in some imaginary action… picturing pulling the dress further down and exposing her bosom… spreading her legs on the seat and inserting himself between them… There was a similar scene in _Icha Icha_.

"Not much further," Kakashi said, loosening the collar of his shirt and his tie. It was just too damn warm around Hanare. _How am I going to deal with this?_ Kakashi fretted as he looked away from his blindfolded date and stared out the window. _How will I ever concentrate on the team… on training…_ He imagined trying to do the most banal things with Hanare, like file a mission report. That brought to mind Hanare in a Konoha uniform, and Kakashi had to adjust his _pants. Exactly. The problem_. Kakashi sighed. No way to figure it out ahead of time. He'd have to come up with something. Later.

The limo pulled to a stop. "Wait here," Kakashi ordered. Hanare frowned but nodded. Kakashi got out and paid the driver. Kakashi glanced at the building they'd pulled up in front of. Aoki and Misty gave him a thumbs-up from the doorway. _It's all set_ , Kakashi thought, pausing next to the limo door. _This is it. I can still walk away now…_

Walk away, to what? An empty apartment. A lifetime of solo challenges with Guy. Walks in the dog park with Pakkun. Hours in solitude at the Memorial Stone. Reading, alone, until the sun came up. Kakashi recalled the entirety of his life in the space of a few heartbeats. A game of go with Sakumo at sunset. A white sheet at a funeral. Rin's and Obito's faces. The echo of his own footstep in an empty house. Guy's smile. Guy's tears. Sweat. Training. Lightning. Rin and Obito again, in blood. Kushina, heavy with Naruto. An anbu mask. Fire, rumbling… and Minato's smile, crumbling away. Jiraiya, laughing, handing him a book. A book with a green-haired girl on the cover. _Where had I seen that before?_ The book, in the dark. Everyone was gone. _Just me and the book, in the dark._ Kakashi closed his eyes. The loneliness hadn't made him cruel, or crazy-yet-and he felt lucky that way. But it was empty. _A lifetime of solo challenges with Guy. Because…_ I'm. Empty. Kakashi felt his heart pound and he knew, somehow, that if he walked away from this there would never be another _this._ In his mind's eye the vision was so clear: he was lying alone, reading in bed… but when he turned his head, suddenly there was Hanare, asleep, her head on his shoulder… a schoolgirl manga open and fallen from her hand, splayed on the covers…

Kakashi opened his eyes. He walked over to the rear passenger door and bent down.

"Hi. You can get out now," he said to Hanare. "Oh, and you can take off the blindfold."

…

" _Vanilla Vanilla?!"_ Hanare gave him a skeptical look. "You told me to dress up-"

"And with good reason!" Kakashi pushed her forward ahead of him into the karaoke bar. Sweat dripped from his temple. _Worse than goading Orochimaru at the Chunin Exams_ the silver-haired jonin thought. He felt his pocket. Kakashi watched Hanare walk into the lounge in slow motion. Leilani and Bonnie were first to jump out, but the others followed suit, surprising her. Hanare turned back to him in surprise, her expression a mixture of amusement, suspicion, and happiness. Her emerald hair bounced over her shoulders as she turned back toward her friends. The loose black lace dress she had on left her shoulders bare and he longed to reach out and take hold of her so he could kiss her there on the perfect skin. But… Kakashi kept his hands firmly in his pockets, a dark specter on the edge of the party. _She's happy. That's all that matters. Even if I wasn't here to be the one for her, I'd want her to be happy._

Kakashi watched as Hanare finally saw Yuki-er, Officer Li. She was standing toward the back of the group, next to the buzzcut soldier. _Date… or bodyguard_? Kakashi mused to himself. The minutes were flowing slowly together, like honey dripping from a waffle (breakfast yesterday)... and Kakashi worked to keep his nerves together. Danté was in position at the table they'd reserved in the main part of the lounge, right at the front. The bouncer from Pink Paradise was there too, he saluted when he saw Kakashi looking. Kakashi gave a discreet nod to Danté and the bouncer (who's name was Kimo, apparently) to let them know all was a go. Kimo, according to Danté, had a voice "like angels and syrup." Kakashi hoped Danté was right, because even in dire circumstances Kakashi Hatake did _not_ do karaoke.

"Kimo the Karaoke Shadow Clone," Kakashi muttered to himself, and smiled under his mask at his own joke. The girls had kidnapped his Hana away from him for the moment and were busy plying her with drinks and catching up. Kakashi glanced around. All in all there were about 20 people in their party, and it _was_ Friday so Vanilla Vanilla was starting to fill up. Kakashi felt a bead of sweat roll down the other temple. Hanare glanced back at him. She smiled. _No time like the present._ Kakashi gave the signal to Danté and to Officer Li.

The aqua-haired host went up to the karaoke DJ and explained the situation. Kakashi felt bad for initially disliking Danté at Paradise-the Assistant Manager who happened to be fond of silk shirts was actually down to earth and helpful, agreeing to Kakashi's scheme even after Asuma had stolen his bike. Officer Li was hugging Hanare. The buxom agent then guided her friend to the first chair at the front of the table, a seat close to the karaoke stage. They were in the main lounge, drenched in magenta lights. No private room this time. Balloons covered the high ceiling and people were crammed in at every glittery table and chair. Kakashi watched as the DJ handed a mic to Danté. Kimo looked calm and ready. Kakashi's hand clenched in his pocket. _The first step of a multi-part gambit…_ the jonin thought with dire heartbeats. _I sure hope Phase 1 is a success…_ Kakashi swallowed. By his calculations, his actual success rate on mission plans wasn't as high as people thought it was…

The music of the previous song faded and the DJ made a quirky scratch. Danté lifted the mic. "Good evening patrons of Vanilla Vanilla! Our group is celebrating a special occasion tonight and I want to announce a very special performance for that occasion. First I need to introduce Rei. Or Hanare, as some people know her." He motioned Hana to stand up. She did, after Bambee poked her… a confused expression on her face. "Rei here has been an awesome friend to all us strippers. Yes, that's right folks. Strippers in the house!" The lounge patrons good-naturedly clapped. Hana looked around and her gaze fell on Kakashi back in the shadows. He have her a reassuring thumbs up. She raised an eyebrow and sat back down.

Danté beamed at everyone. His good nature was infectious. "Rei has the worst luck with romance," he said in a stage whisper. The entire bar laughed. Hana blushed, looking slightly peeved but Barbie handed her a martini and Hana shrugged and played along. "But tonight I think her luck has finally changed," Danté continued. "This song is specially dedicated to Hanare, from a certain gentleman. However, that gentleman can't sing-his exact words were 'no one wants to hear me sing, trust me!'-" The audience cracked up. "So _Kimo_ here will sing the song instead, as the stand-in for Rei's admirer. Let's hear it for Kimo!"

There was loud clapping from everywhere. The huge bouncer stood up and waved, taking the mic from Danté. His deep speaking voice filled the lounge as he glanced at the piece of paper in his hand and said, "This goes out from Kenta to Rei, but also from Kakashi Hatake to Hanare."

The DJ started the track.

SIMPLE SONG

THE SHINS

To the surprise of many, Kimo sang much higher than he spoke. It was, indeed, a voice of angels and syrup.

Kakashi looked at the back of Hanare's head. He smiled in the dark.

 _Well this is just a simple song  
To say what you've done  
I told you about all those fears  
And away they did run  
You sure must be strong  
When you feel like an ocean being warmed by the sun_

 _When I was just nine-years-old  
I swear that I dreamt  
Your face on a football field  
And a kiss that I kept  
Under my vest;  
Apart from everything  
But the heart in my chest_

 _I know that things can really get rough when you go it alone  
Don't go thinking you gotta be tough, and bleed like a stone  
Could be there's nothing else in our lives, so critical  
As this little home_

 _My life in an upturned boat  
Marooned on a cliff  
You brought me a great big flood  
And you gave me a lift  
Girl, what a gift!  
You tell me with your tongue  
And your breath was in my lungs  
And we float up through the rift_

 _I know that things can really get rough when you go it alone  
Don't go thinking you gotta be tough, and bleed like a stone  
Could be there's nothing else in our lives, so critical  
As this little home_

 _Well this would be a simple song  
To say what you've done  
I told you about all those fears  
And away they did run  
You sure must be strong  
When you feel like an ocean being warmed by the sun_

 _Remember walking a mile to your house  
Aglow in the dark  
I made a fumbling play for your heart  
And the act struck a spark  
You wore a charm on the chain that I stole  
Especial for you  
Love's such a delicate thing that we do  
With nothing to prove  
Which I never knew_

The track started to fade. Kimo was amazing. The crowds were applauding and whooping it up.

Hanare hadn't looked back through the entire performance. Kakashi wasn't sure of that was good or bad. Her head seemed slightly bowed. Was Barbie handing her a napkin? Was that good or bad? His heart thudded. _Phase 1. Stay on mission. Time for Phase 2._ A hand sign flashed in the shadows.

 _POOF._ Kakashi appeared directly in front of Hanare. The other patrons gasped. She startled and nearly dropped her drink, glaring at him. _Good, that's normal for us,_ Kakashi thought in sort of a giddy haze. There was more scattered applause around the bar-no one minded a free magic show at karaoke. Kakashi felt in his pocket.

He slid an object out, carefully.

He held it out to Hanare.

It was a copy of _Icha Icha Paradise_.

The green-haired woman blinked. She handed her drink to Grace, and reached out to take the book from Kakashi's outstretched hand, because it seemed he wanted her to. The book cover showed a green-haired woman… running away from a… Kakashi?! Hanare looked closer-there was white hair and a dark mask doodled on top of the original art. A carefully drawn Konoha forehead protector covered the man's left eye.

"Open it," Kakashi said.

Hanare hesitated. There was a bookmark in the novel. She opened to the marked page. The bookmark was plain, but attached to it with a bit of red ribbon was a ring. A gold ring. In the familiar shape of a leaf.

Circled on the page right next to the bookmark, were the words

 _Tadashi got down on one knee. He held the velvet box open in front of Kaori. Inside was the biggest diamond she'd ever seen. "Will you marry me?" Tadashi said._

Hanare looked up with a frown.

Kakashi hadn't said a thing and he was standing. Just staring, looking down at her with that sleepy eye, one hand in his pocket. The nerve.

She jumped up and threw her arms around his neck.

"Of course I'll marry you!" she nearly shouted, planting such a huge, unexpected kiss on the Copy Ninja's face that Kakashi lost his balance in the shock of it all and fell…

Crashing backwards onto the karaoke stage…

With Hanare on top of him.

Everyone in the lounge went absolutely nuts.

"I'm here to take you home, Hana," Kakashi murmured, "To Konoha."

Hanare pulled down his mask, but Kakashi didn't mind because she covered his face with her own in another kiss. Their kiss. Except this time, with nothing between them… but love.


	25. Epilogue (Phases 3-5)

Guy ran, breakneck and breathless, through the streets of Konohagakure. His orange legwarmers were making his tuxedo pants ride up but at least they perfectly matched his orange tie. There was only a short break scheduled for between the wedding photos and the start of the ceremony seating and Guy needed to get back to the festivities before he was missed.

The note had said to meet at the training grounds. Guy's feet pounded the street. The note had been signed, _Yuki._

"Why did the photos have to take so long?!" Manly tears streamed from Guy's eyes as he imagined missing out on his chance because of tardiness. _It would be just like my Eternal Rival to somehow engineer a way to make me, Might Guy, the timeliest shinobi in Konoha, LATE to meet Miss Yuki!"_

"I'll make Kakashi twice as late on MY wedding day!" Guy shouted to no one. He tripled his pace in a burst of zeal and a cloud of dust streamed out in his wake.

…

Kakashi lay on a chaise lounge kindly built by Yamato as he pretended to read. He knew Hana would yell at him about rumpling his suit but he didn't care-any attention from her would be good compared to the last month of barely any attention at all. Kakashi sighed. He placed full blame on Lady Hokage. Just like a real meddling grandma, she'd managed to influence his marital affairs.

The meeting with Tsunade had been as good as one could hope for, though, considering the situation. Kakashi gave most of the credit to Hanare's charms, but he felt his plan had contributed too.

Phase 1 and 2 had been successful. Kakashi still felt mild shock that the public proposal gambit had worked, which offset his great discomfort with such things. Just in case Hana had been reluctant, he'd calculated that having all those people around would make it harder for her to turn him down. Luckily, his fears seemed to have been unfounded since she was so enthusiastic… but one could never be too careful with these things…

Phase 3 was to get Hana to the Leaf Village. That had been easier than expected. Phase 4 had been to get Tsunade to grant Hanare a trial visa. "Lady Hokage," Kakashi had used his most formal and polite manners and bow, "Allow me to introduce my _fiancée,_ Hanare."

Tsunade had been tough but the plan had worked. "Cute, Hatake. That even rhymes. Want to tell me what the hell is going on?! What are you playing at, anyway?" Tsunade had glared over her desk. In the end though, it was hard to deny the prospect of matrimonial bliss to a comrade. Hanare had made a good impression thanks to a sincere interest in Tsunade's favorite brands of saké. Tsunade had agreed to all of Kakashi's requests, on one condition:

"You'd better be married in a month, Hatake! And this young lady will need to prove herself. Do you plan to get back into Hidden Village work, Hanare? Special Jonin in Konoha is a lot of work. You'd need to retake all the standard tests, plus prove equivalency in our espionage division…"

Kakashi sighed again at the memory. He hadn't wanted to be rushed into the actual wedding. It was like Tsunade thought he was bluffing and had called him. And it had also put a rush on his and Hana's discussion of her work situation. He was fine with her in a Konoha uniform, of course-but back in espionage? He'd pictured something more like teaching at the Academy…

"Kakashi they're ready for you," Asuma said, ambling over from the pavilion. He puffed a smoke ring at his silver-haired friend. "You did good, Kash."

"Thanks for fronting me the money."

"Don't mention it. You're paying me back with interest, anyway."

The wind rustled the trees. Some leaves dropped, fluttering on the breeze. They were the same color as Hanare's hair. Kakashi peeked up over the edge of _Tactics_ to look at the sky. The clouds were perfect. Even with all the hassles, Kakashi was still happier than he'd ever been.

…

Guy panted to a stop in the training grounds. He was only tired for a second, though, before zipping into perfect posture and smoothing his bowl cut with a palm-lick and practiced swirl of his hand. "The Green Beast has arrived!" he said, flashing a pearly grin around the training yard. "I am at your disposal, sweet Yuki! Wherever you are," he said loudly.

"I was kinda hoping for the Pikachu jumpsuit," Officer Li said, emerging from behind a tree. She was wearing an ivory lace dress that had an uneven hem and showed her cute feet. A sun hat covered her hair, which was down in two pigtails instead of up in two buns.

"I will commission a Pikachu tuxedo IMMEDIATELY," Guy said, bowing six times.

"You're adorable," Officer Li laughed. "Now show me to the shindig, jumpsuit-sama."

…

 _Phase 5_. _Rushed, but… whatever_. Kakashi's eye crinkled at the corner as he watched Hanare walk down the aisle.

…

"It had to be a country song, didn't it," Kakashi complained as he twirled Hanare and dipped her low during their First Dance.

"Keep it up and you'll be singing about how your wife left you and you hate your job and the only ones who love you are your dog. I mean dogs," Hanare giggled.

"Hmm. That sounds just like me," Kakashi mused. "Do you think I'd be good at that? Maybe I chose the wrong career."

"We'll be traveling street performers together!"

"No one wants to pay to see me dance," Kakashi laughed.

"You just need a skimpier outfit," Hanare winked. Kakashi's left eye widened. "Maybe some leather? Bonnie could teach you how to line dance like she does in her-"

"No," Kakashi said emphatically, wrapping his arms around Hanare and crushing her to him so she had to stop talking.

"Fffwine," Hanare sighed in disappointment.

"Mmm. This is nice," Kakashi said as they swayed together. "You were too far away earlier." The song was almost over. Hanare tightened her grip on his suit.

"Is Master Kenta satisfied with what he asked for?"

"Very." Kakashi kissed the top of her head.

"Good," Hanare nuzzled her face into his chest.

"But Rei, I might need you to dance with me again, to a different song, since I wasn't that fond of this one. And also, I might need you to be naked."

"Kakashi! Sssh, people will-"

"The customer is always right… right?" His half-lidded eye glinted down at her.

"FINE."

...

Tsunade sipped her spiked tea, contentedly reading the daily bulletin and perusing the file of Hatake wedding photos Shikamaru had brought over earlier. She stuffed a crème pan pastry in her mouth and grinned, amused at how the shinobi had all insisted at wearing their trademark items even at such a formal event. Kakashi, with his mask… Asuma, Guardian Shinobi bandana looped at his waist… Guy with his leg warmers! Tsunade laughed. She poured more saké into her teacup.

Hanare had chosen a very odd color pairing for the event… orange and purple. It was an autumn wedding though, and the orange did look nice with the leaves turning color. Tsunade had no idea why purple… Hanare did have an avant-garde sort of personal style, though, so maybe that had something to do with it.

The bride's dress was off-white and off-shoulder, with long sleeves and a huge bow in the back, tied from an orange-and-purple embroidered obi. Hanare had chosen to wear her hair down, with some traditional ornaments and a comb worked into the style. No veil. Kakashi stood comfortably next to her, one hand gently curved around his bride, the other in his pocket. The Lady Hokage could tell he was smiling under his mask.

She flipped to the next photo. It was a candid-Asuma in the middle of frantically ditching his cigarette, Guy giving a double thumbs-up, Kakashi scratching his head and Hanare glaring at him. Plus, the genin doing a bunch of random stuff including Sakura punching Naruto in the face. Tsunade took that photo from the stack with a chuckle and propped it up on her desk. _That'll give me a much needed laugh in dark times._ She reached for another cream pan. _Look at all those kids. Just getting started..._

Tsunade _hmphed_ like a proud granny. "Looks like Hatake wasn't faking it after all. Nice to see him finally settled down."

...

[Phase 6?!...]

Kakashi's eye widened. He looked a little faint. Hanare rolled her eyes. They'd talked about it for months.

"Are you okay?" Hanare raised an eyebrow. All she wanted was a teriyaki and katsu XL bento and her husband couldn't go get her one if he was passed out.

"I guess I need to start working on a… Diaper Change Jutsu…" Kakashi scratched his head.

"How about you start working on _names_ ," Hanare said. "Or the spare room. Or the back deck. Or the roof. Or the…"

"Names sounds great," Kakashi said smoothly. "Guy's baby will have two names, he tells me, so ours should have at least three."

Hanare thought a moment. "Cloud."

"Sky," Kakashi said.

"Leaf..."

"...Hatake."

…

 _KONOHAGAKURE NEWS_

 _ **World and Politics**_

 _-Naruto Defeats Dangerous Missing Nin_

 _-A Sarutobi Legacy: Remembering the Third and Jonin Asuma_

 _-The State of Sunagakure_

 _ **Entertainment**_

 _-Icha Icha original series to air on Netflix_

 _-Yukie Fujikaze Quits Icha Series Amidst Contract Disputes_

 _-International Casting Call for Actress to Play Kaori in Icha Icha Adaptation_

 _ **Local**_

 _-New Ichiraku Location Opens This Summer_

 _-Debate on Maid Cafés in Konoha Rages On_

 _-Lost Cat: Tora, Large Reward_

 _ **Obituaries, April**_

 _None_

 _ **Births**_

 _Kumo Sora Asuma Rifu Hatake_

 _April 27_

…

 _ **The End**_

 _(and the beginning)_

 _Hope_

 _You_

 _Enjoyed_

 _The_

 _Story_

 _Thanks… for… playing!..._

 **Soundtrack**

1 Welcome to Tokyo / World Order

2 I Took a Pill in Ibiza / Mike Posner

3 Uptown Funk / Mark Ronson feat. Bruno Mars

4 Call Me Maybe / Carly Rae Jepsen

5 Shot at the Night / The Killers

6 This Is What You Came For / Rihanna

7 The Night is Still Young / Nicki Minaj

8 Again / Janet Jackson

9 The Way I Are / Timbaland

10 Ballroom Blitz / The Sweet

11 That Don't Impress Me Much / Shania Twain

12 Riptide / Vance Joy

13 Simple Song / The Shins

14 If I Die Young / The Band Perry

15 Sugar / Maroon 5


End file.
